Of Friends And Lovers - Dark Version

Of Friends And Lovers - Dark Version 11-21

Rating: PG for this part

Dedication: to Hannahbee for the support with this baby, it´s good to know I´m not alone with my little, twisted mind *huggles* Also: HAPPY NEW YEAR everyone!!!

Feedback: especially for this one, please?

If you´re still with me I hope you enjoy this part. Feedback is, as always, appreciated and dearly loved.

Important Note: Ok. The Original "Of friends and lovers" is complete and posted. However I couldn´t help thinking about the "what if…". This one IS the "what if…". This Part 11 continues the original story in another way. Up to Part 10 this DARK VERSION (as I call it) and the ORIGINAL are the same. So I guess you should read those before starting on this ;o)

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Part 11 - Family

Buffy opened the envelope with trembling fingers and there it was. The results were clearly identifying Holland Manners as Buffy´s biological father.

Nobody bothered to give Adam a call. Buffy didn't know whether she should cry or feel relieved that she finally had proof. Holland was her father. Angel was her brother.

The letter was left on the table, the silence in the living room filled with shock and despair. Without a word she stood and walked up the stairs. While Buffy was upstairs, rocking back and forth on her bed in an almost catatonic state, Darla tried to explain things to Maggie. But it was useless, Maggie was finally falling apart and nothing that Darla said or did was helping to calm her down. For more than 20 years her companion, her love had lied to her, cheated on her and build an essential part of their relationship on betrayal. They had wanted a child together and since Maggie couldn't have children after Ben's birth Darla had agreed to get a donation. Buffy had been born and how couldn't she love her from the second she saw her? Buffy was her daughter, too. And yet, now that Maggie knew the truth, Buffy was a constant reminder of Darla´s betrayal.

Sadness was quickly followed by anger and after an hour Maggie had made her decision: she wanted Darla to move out. Her lover cried and begged her to understand but nothing could soften Maggie´s heart. Enough was enough. It would be better for all of them to part ways, even if their ways would be plastered with broken hearts.

Darla climbed the stairs to her daughter's room, having to tell her not only to leave her home but her family as well. Buffy´s broken voice answered her knock on the door:

"Yeah?"

"Buffy, sweetheart...I need to talk to you..."

"Okay..."

"Uhm...Maggie...she wants me, us to move out."

"What?"

"We're gonna move out. It's hard and it's sudden but I'm sure it's just for the best..."

"Yeah.", Buffy snorted.

"Buffy, I know you're angry. I understand that. Please, believe me, I never wanted things to turn out this way."

"Right. You wanted to continue lying to Mag and keep fucking my ´father`..."

"Don't talk to me like that!"

"Darla, do you realize what you've done? For your happiness and convenience you're let people suffer. People who love you. Your family!"

"Buffy...I know I've made mistakes. But I can't turn back time. I...we have to be mature and deal with the situation. We're gonna move out today. We're gonna stay at a hotel until we have an apartment. Sweetheart, please don't look at me like that..."

"I'm not going with you."

"You have to...it's Maggie´s wish...you can't stay here."

"I'm not gonna stay at the hotel with you."

"What do you mean?"

"I'm gonna stay at Faith's. I'm not going with you. Mom, you lied to me. I...I just don't want to see you right now..."

"Ok...ok. I understand that. Stay at Faith's, I´ll get a room at a hotel until we have an apartment. I´ll look after your things, have them moved and..."

"Mom, leave me alone, please..."

Darla turned towards the door. Behind her, Maggie stepped into the room with a soft knock on the door.

"Buffy..."

"Maggie...", Buffy was close to tears again.

"I heard what you said and I want you to know that my decision has nothing to do with you. I love you. You're my daughter...I just can't stand all this anymore."

"I know, Mag. I understand. And I love you, too. It's just like this bomb gets dropped on me and I...I don´t know what's real anymore..."

Sensing that there was more than just the news about her father and her moving out troubling Buffy, Maggie closed the distance between them and hugged Buffy closely. Both were fighting tears again, knowing that this was goodbye.

"I want you to know that even if it´s hard for me right now, I'm always there for you.", Maggie told her.

"Thanks."

Soon Buffy was left alone in her room again, trying to deal with the events of the past hour. Having to accept that Angel was really her brother was nearly killing her. But being ripped from home made her a wreck. Dialing Faith's number with trembling fingers, she crouched on her bed again.

"´Lo?"

"Faith..."

"Buffy? What's..."

"Could you come over, help me pack my things?"

"Sure... are you ok?"

"No..."

"I´ll be there in a sec."

Faith listened to the news, nearly unable to follow Buffy´s babbling.

"He's my brother and...I...Mom's at a hotel...move out, Maggie...could I...with you?"

She pulled the blonde into her arms, stroking her hair.

"Buffy... I'm so sorry...", she tried to soothe her. "You can stay with me as long as you want. We'll work something out. I know it's hard but we'll deal. Okay?"

Buffy smiled at her gratefully.

After a while they packed some of Buffy´s clothes and other stuff into two large bags. With one last look back, Buffy pulled the door shut behind her, knowing that she wasn't coming back. The room bore so many memories she, at least partly, needed to shut away. Both girls hugged Maggie and said goodbye.

It was a silent ride to the Matthew's house.

Even after she had left home, the image of Angel kept coming up in Buffy´s mind.

Darla dropped her suitcases and took a look around the room. It wasn't one of the finer hotels in town but within the acceptable range. After all, she wasn't planning on staying there for a long time.

She sighed and sat down on the bed. Maggie had really kicked her out. Buffy was blaming her and she had every right to do so. Darla knew she had screwed things up big time but after living the lie for more than 20 years it surprised her that it had lasted so long. She loved Maggie but still couldn´t keep herself from going to Holland again and again. She had wanted it all and now she ended up having nothing. Not the best way to feel. She didn't deserve this.

Before she knew it, she had picked up the receiver, dialing the familiar number.

He picked up on the third ring.

"Manners."

"Holland, it's me."

"Darla." Why did she call him? "Is everything alright?"

"I'm calling from the hotel. Maggie kicked me out."

"Really? Why did she...".

"The results came today. You are Buffy´s father."

Well, that was something he didn't expect. And yet he couldn't help instantly liking the thought of having another daughter with the woman he, even after the chaos of the past weeks, still loved.

"Darla, I...and she didn't take it well?"

"Buffy?"

"Maggie."

"No. She said it was too much having to look at Buffy all the time, knowing you are the father."

"And where is Buffy now?"

"She's staying with a friend. It was all too much for her."

"I wish I could do something for the two of you." After all, it was his fault, too, that Darla and Buffy were homeless now.

"That's sweet. I knew you were going to understand. But really, we're ok."

"Where are you staying?"

"At the hotel near my office."

"I´ll pay your room. Take the best you can get."

"Holland, really, it's ok...even if I feel...never mind."

"You must be feeling horrible. Would you mind me coming over?"

"Holland you don't need to..."

"But I want to. What room is it?"

"314. And thank you."

"I´ll be there in 30 minutes."

"Okay."

Putting the receiver down, Darla smiled. Holland was coming. Everything was going to be alright, he would take care of her.

She hastily unpacked and changed and then he was already knocking on the door, a bunch of flowers in his hand.

She opened the door and kissed him on the cheek.

"Why don't we go to the bar?", she suggested after accepting the flowers.

He nodded and led her out of the room.

After a few days with Faith, Buffy finally opened up to her. She told her best friend everything about the letter, Holland being her father, Angel as her brother, Maggie wanting them to leave and Darla´s reaction to it.

"She just didn't seem so shocked...", she ended her speech.

"You mean like she suspected it or like she didn't care?", Faith asked her.

"She was just so...calm. Cool. The woman she spent the last 20 years with kicks her out and she just takes it..."

"Maybe she knew it'd be useless."

"Or maybe she already had other plans?", was the question Faith didn't utter.

"I know she feels sorry for what happened or how things turned out.", Buffy nodded. "She wouldn't call every day if she didn't."

"And did she find an apartment yet?"

"No, she's still at the hotel."

"Oh and your father, does he know?"

"She called to tell him. I think they might have met..."

"And he wants to see you some time? Wouldn't you like to? I mean...he's your father and all..."

"Yeah. I think I want to meet him. Just not now."

Faith nodded.

"And what about Angel? You think he knows?", the brunette asked.

"I dunno.", Buffy shrugged.

"And what about the two of you?", Faith kept digging just a little deeper.

"There is no ´two of us`. We're over. He's my brother. I dunno what'll happen if I meet him. Right now it's all just too blurry..."

"You need time. Maybe some day you'll talk and everything's gonna be alright.", Faith offered her support.

"Yeah...", Buffy nodded absently. Once she didn't start crying every time she thought about Angel, maybe they'd be alright then...

"Ok. Ice cream now.", Faith hopped off the bed and pulled Buffy with her.

They were sitting in one of the finer restaurants in town, enjoying themselves. During the last week they'd met every day, having dinner, talking. However, today was a little different. While Darla was talking about the difficulties of finding an apartment, Holland was unusually quiet. When dessert arrived, he watched Darla happily digging into her Mousse au chocolate until she suddenly flinched and then pulled something out of her mouth. Something that looked like a ring. Her eyes widened in shock and flickered over to Holland. Only that Holland wasn't sitting at his place but kneeling at her side.

"Holland?"

"I know it might not be the best moment but I wanted to do this for so long. I love you and I want to spend my life with you. I want to know our daughter and I want you to meet my children. Darla Summers, do you want to marry me?"

Darla looked down at him and thought about it for a second. There was a man who loved her, who knew her and who wanted her. He offered her a life together, a house and a position in society. He was Buffy´s father. She knew him. She'd be safe with him. A smile crept up her lips and looking down at Holland, she nodded. Like in a trance he took the ring and placed it on her finger. Only then did he kiss her while the other occupants of the restaurant started to applaud.

"I love you, Darla."

"I love you, too."

"I can't wait to tell the children.", Holland was stroking her hand. Darla smiled at him again.

"When do you want the wedding?", she asked.

"As soon as possible. I hope that's what you want, too."

"Of course.", Darla nodded. "Oh my, there's so much to do! The wedding, we have to move, when do we tell the children?"

"Don't worry, darling. Everything's gonna be fine. Just calm down. You'll get all the help you need."

"Angel? Is your sister there?"

"Hi Dad. Yeah, she's here. We're just having breakfast."

"Listen, I want you two to meet me for dinner tomorrow night. I've got something important to tell you."

"Uhm, fine. Are you ok?"

"Don't worry, it's good news."

"Ok, I´ll tell Lilah. Bye Dad."

"Pedro´s. 7 p.m., tomorrow. Bye Angel."

Holland leaned back into the pillows, handing the phone to Darla.

"Your turn."

She propped herself up and dialed Faith's number.

"Hello Faith. Is Buffy there?"

"Sure. BUFFY! YOUR MOM!!"

"Mom? Hi."

"Hi, sweetheart. Listen, I want you to meet me for dinner tomorrow night. I've got good news."

"Uhm...ok...where?"

"You know Pedro´s? Tomorrow night, 7 p.m.. And honey, pick a nice dress or something."

"Mom? What is going on?"

"Nothing...just make sure you're on time."

"Oh-kay..."

"Sweetheart, I gotta go. See you tomorrow..."

"Bye Mom."

Handing the phone back to Faith, Buffy shook her head.

"Now she's lost it..."

Faith shot her a questioning glance.

"Darla wants to see me ´punctual and in a nice dress` at Pedro´s tomorrow. Says she got good news."

"Maybe she got an apartment?", Faith took a guess.

"Good idea...but what's with the dress?"

"Oh...maybe she's introducing you to your dad?!"

"Oh god...right! Oh my god...what am I supposed to wear?"

"Go with the simple but striking.", Faith patted her on the arm. "Don't worry. It's gonna be fine."

"I need one of your dresses. Mine are all still at the house..."

"That or the mall.", Faith grinned.

Checking her appearance once again, Buffy sighed and pushed the door open. She knew the dress suited her. It was knee length and the lighter blue fabric was covered with a floral print in a darker blue, underlining her tan. She wanted to look good when she met her father, even if she wasn't sure why she wanted to impress him. She wasn't even sure what she expected from this meeting.

As soon as she had entered the room, Darla came rushing towards her, greeting her more heartily than usual.

"Sweetheart, there you are. Oh and how good you look, why don't you leave your jacket here we're sitting right..."

"Mom, it's ok. I'm here. Calm down."

"Sorry, I'm just so excited."

She started to lead Buffy over to a table in the more quiet area, stopping in front of a man in his fifties. He smiled at her and stood up.

"Buffy, I want you to meet your father, Holland Manners. Holland, this is Buffy."

"Hello Buffy.", he held out his hand. "I'm glad we finally meet. I've heard so much about you. And may I say you're even more beautiful than on the pictures." He smiled.

Buffy blushed and hesitantly took his hand.

"Uhm...Hi."

So this was her father. He looked good. A friendly smile upon his face and sparkling eyes. Eyes she had definitely seen before. Quickly she pushed the thought away.

"I hope we'll get to know each other a little better with time, only if you want to, of course."

"Uhm...sure.", Buffy smiled.

"She's not that quiet usually...she's just surprised, I guess", Darla jumped in as they sat down.

"Mom, please.", Buffy pleaded. What the hell was going on here?

"Oh look, Holland here they come!", Darla chirped.

Holland stood up again, leaving the table. Buffy couldn't follow him with her eyes because Darla started talking again.

Holland returned after a few minutes with two other figures in tow. Buffy shortly glanced up and then stared at them in total shock.

"Well, Lilah, Angel...this is Darla. And this is your sister, Buffy. Darla, Buffy, this is my daughter Lilah and this is my son Angel."

Darla and Lilah shook hands and exchanged the usual pleasantries while Buffy and Angel just stared at each other. A turmoil of feelings was running through them and when they locked eyes, they both knew the other was feeling exactly the same.

Finally Buffy was startled out of her silence when Lilah approached to hug her.

"Buffy, I'm glad to meet you.", she smiled at her and Buffy couldn't help but return the gesture.

Angel finally remembered his good manners an shook hands with Darla. Then he, too, approached Buffy. Should he shake hands with her? Hug her? She looked awesome and despite the situation all he wanted to do was kiss her. When he stood before her, they locked eyes again and finally hugged tightly. It felt so good to be able to touch each other again, it lasted a little longer than usual.

"Hi.", she finally whispered.

"Hey.", he replied softly.

They all sat down and ordered something to drink and picked their dinner. Buffy and Angel dared not to look at each other very often and the table remained in a somewhat awkward silence until Holland cleared his throat, took a sip of wine and started to talk:

"I know it is a strange situation here. But believe me, we wouldn't have called you together if it wasn't for a reason.", looking at the puzzled faces of his children, he turned to Darla who now stood up as well, pressing her hand.

She got the implication and opened her mouth to speak: "We're gonna get married."

Silence followed her words.

Lilah was the first one to react. She knew about the affair between Darla and her father but it was obvious that he loved her. If she made him happy, it was fine with her. And with Buffy she got the little sister she always wanted. She walked around the table and hugged both her father and Darla, congratulating them.

Angel sat there in utter shock. Finally he dared looking at Buffy and the sight of her broke his heart again. She simply stared at the table, fighting breakdown. After a while she met his gaze and softly shook her head. He mirrored her movement. All he wanted to do was pull her into his arms and make the pain, hers and his own, disappear. Lilah nudged him in the ribs and he realized he needed to react in a certain way.

"Well...good for you.", he forced a fake smile on his face, shaking hands with his father and Darla.

Now it was Buffy´s turn to face her parents. Unable to speak she simply hugged both her mother and her father.

Darla and Holland would get married and she knew that meant they were moving in with the Manner's family. The consequences of the announcement were becoming more clear to her with every second.

"When do you want the wedding?", Lilah asked to break the silence.

"In two weeks.", Holland smiled at her, not realizing the shocked gasps from both Buffy and Angel because the waiter had chosen to deliver their food that very moment.

"And we need for you to do us a favor.", Darla added. "Buffy, I wanted to ask you to be my maid in honor..."

"...And Angel, I want you to be my best man.", Holland concluded her sentence.

That was too much for Buffy to stand. She broke into a run as she left the table, fleeing from the restaurant. For a short moment, Angel was tempted to follow her example but then thought better of it. He couldn't follow her. Just like he couldn't be with her. They were family...

TBC... After all we have a wedding to attend…

Tell me what you think of this, please? :o)

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Part 12 - Hell's Bells

Rating: This part is NC-17

Feedback: yes, please?

Important Note: Again: Ok. The Original "Of friends and lovers" is complete and posted. However I couldn't help thinking about the "what if…". This one IS the "what if…". This Part 11 continues the original story in another way. Up to Part 10 this DARK VERSION (as I call it) and the ORIGINAL are the same. So I guess you should read those before starting on this ;o)

Dedication: to my wonderful-best-twin-ever Hannahbee! *smooch* Thanks again for having me over on New Year's :o), to Tim because it's so much fun shocking him (and boy, you really DO look good *lol*), to Leni, in hope for Yummy Angelus ;o)

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After the initial shock had faded, Buffy headed straight into a state of both numbness and denial. She avoided seeing Darla as good as possible, afraid of her inquiring looks and questions she couldn't answer. Faith was doing her best to be supportive and tried to distract her, but even she couldn't bring the blonde to smile very often.

Buffy and Angel met twice during the next week.

The first occasion was another family dinner, this time at the hotel that would host the wedding the following week. Darla did most of the conversation while both Buffy and Angel remained unusually quiet. Lilah was exceptionally kind towards Buffy, trying to get to know her new sister and Buffy couldn't help but liking her instantly. She reminded her of Angel more than once and even their difference in age didn't hinder them in making small talk about all kinds of things. Angel was a whole different chapter. Though he wasn't cool, he barely exchanged more than a 'hi' with Buffy. It hurt more than she'd imagined that he ignored her, but still she felt grateful, unable to think of a way to start a "normal" conversation with him. So they exchanged a glance every now and then, feeling caught every time their eyes met. Soon it became obvious to the other family members that Buffy and Angel seemed both to have difficulties with the situation. While Darla was rather worried about that detail, Holland managed to soothe her nervousness, calming her down with suggestions that "the children" needed time to deal with the situation and needed to get to know each other.

The rather awkward dinner was followed by an even more awkward scene at the bridal shop. Surely on purpose, Darla had the both of them ordered to the place to look after Buffy's dress and Angel's tuxedo at the same time. After talking Buffy into one dress after another, Darla pushed her in front of the big mirror. While Buffy glanced awkwardly at her reflection, Angel stepped out of his fitting room, coming to stand beside her. Their eyes met in the mirror, overflowing with a mix of sadness, longing and uneasiness. Before either of them could say a word, Darla's voice once again shook them out of their trance.

"Oh dear, look at the two of you! You look so cute together!", she chirped.

Buffy blushed immediately and after meeting Angel's glance for a second turned around to face her mother.

"I'm not sure this is the right dress, Mom." Was it just her or did her voice sound hoarse?

"It's a shame you two don't seem to get a long...", Darla ignored her daughter's remark completely, pulling at the dress here and there. Angel shot them a look and returned to his fitting room, suddenly feeling weak in his knees.

Horribly embarrassed, Buffy yanked her arm from her mother's grip.

"Mom! Dress! Can we just get this done?", she almost barked.

She turned on her heel and headed to her own fitting room. By the time she stepped in front of the large mirror again, Angel had already left the shop.

When the big day was finally there, Buffy felt as if it had only been yesterday that her world had started to fall apart. She got up way too early, unable to sleep, needing something to do, something that would keep her busy because if she stopped, she didn't know how to stop from shaking.

Faith asked her over and over if she was okay, feeling helpless at the sight of her best friend walking around like a ghost. Of course it had to be hard, having this whole new life all of a sudden. Not to speak of having the guy you were in love with only a few weeks ago as your new brother. Poor Buffy...

The girls got ready, Buffy's dress on the back seat, and headed for the church about noon. There were already a few cars lining up, reminding Buffy once again of how her life was going to change, now that she was officially the daughter of Holland Manners. When they stepped out of the car, Lilah came rushing towards them. Angel was nowhere to be seen.

"There you are!", Lilah smiled and hugged her sister.

"Hi Lilah.", Buffy smiled back. "Oh. Lilah, this is Faith, Faith, meet my big sister, Lilah."

Faith and Lilah greeted each other with an open smile.

"You better go inside, get dressed. If you need help...", Lilah was still smiling. "Angel's somewhere in there, too. I think he's maybe struggling with his bow tie."

Buffy nodded and headed towards the church with Faith in tow. She needed to find Darla first, then get into her dress and do her hair. Avoid Angel as long as possible and everything will be fine, she thought to herself.

Darla came rushing towards her, already in her dress.

"Sweetheart, there you are! Hello Faith...", she hugged both girls and ushered them into the next open door.

Buffy fell into a trance, acting like on auto-pilot. She got dressed, pinned her hair with Faith's help and checked her reflection in the mirror. Darla and Faith kept talking and seemed to be content with a nod from Buffy every now and then. But suddenly she was once again startled by Darla touching her arm.

"Buffy?"

"Yeah?", she asked, puzzled.

"I'm gonna ask you to do me a favor...", Darla started.

"Sure, whatever it is...", Buffy managed to smile.

"I know you and Angel don't seem to get along that well." Before Buffy could object, Darla continued: "But it's a family day, Buffy. Our wedding. So I really hope the two of you could at least try to be civil...".

Faith and Buffy exchanged a short glance behind Darla´s back before Buffy nodded.

"Sure." Civil. Whatever that meant.

Faith decided to save her friend, asking if anything else needed to be done. But Darla couldn't think of anything and so Buffy and Faith were free to go out and have a look at the increasing number of guests.

The church was crowded with people Buffy had never seen before. For a second or two she caught a glimpse of Holland and Angel talking but quickly turned into another direction. When Lilah started directing people towards their seats, Buffy started panicking and before Faith could do so much as blink, Buffy had made up an excuse and disappeared into an empty room. Trying to calm down and even her breath, she opened the window. She'd never thought this would be so hard and yet running away wasn't an option. She had to be mature. Step by step was the way to go.

Her attempts of denial were suddenly interrupted when the door opened again. Whirling around to face whatever was coming, she looked at the only one she wasn't prepared for.

"Angel.", she gasped.

"Buffy.", he echoed. God, she looked beautiful in the sunlight, the light pink dress underlining both her tan and her curves perfectly. He didn't expect meeting her when he went in search of an empty room to calm down. The whole day he had fought the urge to run away, trying to be mature and help both Lilah and his father. His own feelings certainly weren't something he wanted them to notice...

They stared at each other for a while before Buffy finally spoke.

"Is it time?", she asked, taking a few steps towards him.

"No...uhm, I dunno...", he admitted, gesturing towards the door.

"I was just trying to find a quiet place to...struggle with that damn bow tie.", he grimaced.

She smiled and walked across the room. Quit being such a damn baby, Buffy. You've done this for Ben a dozen times, she mentally scolded herself. Finally she stood in front of Angel, looking up at him.

"Need some help?", she grinned and when he returned the smile and nodded his head, she reached for him. Dammit, he looked absolutely gorgeous in his tux, his shoulders seemed even broader than before. 'Stop drooling, Summers!'

She was, however, both shocked and surprised when Angel reached up to tuck a stray of hair behind her left ear.

Her eyes flew up to search his face when he almost whispered:

"You look beautiful...". His hand lingered on her shoulder and neither of them noticed that his bow tie was now perfectly bound.

"You look good, too.", she whispered, her hands still resting on his chest.

"Oh God", he groaned and closed his eyes for a second. "I never thought this would be so hard." He opened his eyes again.

"What do you mean?", she replied.

"I never thought it would be so hard, seeing you but not being able to talk to you, to touch you...", his fingers stroked her bare shoulders, raising goosebumps.

"Touch me? I'm right here...see?", she cupped his face with her hands.

"Not in the way I want to touch you...", he croaked out and pulled her a little closer.

"Every time I see you, all I want is to take you in my arms and kiss you. God, Buffy, I'm starving for you!"

"I know the feeling...", she whispered.

The next seconds seemed like an eternity to them. Their gazes locked and seemed to be on fire. The moment Buffy stood on her toes, Angel pulled her into his arms. They moved closer and closer until they were separated by mere inches. When their lips met everything seemed to fall apart.

The kiss tasted of desperation, forbidden lust, love and the need to take comfort in each other. The tension of the past weeks fell away from them and all that was left was them. Tentative and gentle at first the kiss grew more intense with every second. Their bodies intertwined, their tongues dueled, making love, both of them were content and at peace for the moment until the need for air became a serious issue and they finally and reluctantly broke apart. Still in each other's arms the first waves of shock came crushing down on them. Buffy searched for his eyes, panting.

"Oh God.", she breathed heavily, tears welling in her eyes.

"Oh God.", he echoed, still not letting go of her.

They gazed at each other while their breathing evened out, trying to understand what had just happened between them.

Suddenly the door burst open, causing them to jump and finally let go of each other, facing the intruder.

"There you are!", Lilah exclaimed with a mix of joy and anger. "Everybody's waiting for you, what the hell have you done?"

Buffy blushed slightly and looked at Angel.

"Uhm, bow tie. I needed help with my bow tie.", Angel stammered out.

Lilah shot him an amused look.

"Get out of here. And Angel, try to smooth your hair a little. You look like a mop."

Angel nodded and shot Buffy a glance when Lilah went out of the door again. But Buffy didn't return his gaze.

Lilah led them to the chapel where she stopped once more and turned to look at them.

"You know what to do, right?"

The blank expression of her siblings caused her to roll her eyes.

"You're going to walk down the aisle together as soon as the music starts.", she declared and with a last look at them walked to her seat.

The moment she sat, the organ started to play. Buffy saw Holland standing in front of the altar and heard Darla´s dress rustling behind her. She glanced at Angel, the tears in her eyes mirrored by his.

He offered her his arm and felt her trembling. Slowly they started to walk, both begging their legs to carry them far enough.

Walking down the aisle together was both perfect and the worst torture. During the ceremony they ran on auto pilot, listening to the priest and their parent's vows, never daring to look at each other for too long. It was as if the priest addressed not Darla and Holland, but them. As if this was the wedding both of them dreamed of deep within their hearts.

All of a sudden the ceremony was over when the priest announced the bride and the groom.

Following their parents down the aisle they were the first ones to congratulate them outside the church, expressing their happiness and best wishes.

After the numerous congratulations, the pictures were taken and finally the limos arrived to take them to the hotel. Holland and Darla took, of course, the first one. Buffy, Angel, Lilah and Faith shared the second one. The tension between Angel and Buffy was so somehow less evident with the two others distracting them.

Soon they arrived at the hotel and were led into the restaurant where their parents were already waiting for them. Buffy was relieved to find out that Faith would join them at the family table to dine with them, even as she discovered that she had been placed between Faith and Angel.

Dinner was incredibly good - in more sense than one. They ate until they could barely move and, encouraged by Faith and maybe a little alcohol, Buffy and Angel were able to make the easy kind of conversation Darla seemed to want from them.

After dinner it was soon time to dance. The small band started to play and Darla and Holland shared the first dance of the day. Soon the other guests joined them on the dancefloor. Angel asked Lilah to dance and so Faith and Buffy were sitting alone at the table.

"Are you okay?", Faith asked her.

"Yeah, sure.", Buffy smiled at her and returned to watch her parents.

"He seems nice, your dad.", Faith started again.

"Yeah. He really is. I mean, I don't know him that well, but...", Buffy replied.

"Of course. But nice is a good start.", Faith glanced at the dancefloor, too.

After a while Holland led his wife back to the table, a little exhausted from dancing.

"I have to take a short break for a while before I can dance with my two beautiful daughters.", he smiled at Buffy.

While Buffy returned the smile, Angel dropped himself on another chair.

"Holland, with this marriage you got a little more than you maybe wished for.", Darla chirped.

While Buffy and Angel shared a shocked glance, the blonde went on:

"This is Buffy's best friend, Faith Matthews and I have to say, she's like a second daughter to me. I expect we'll see her at the house quite often.", she winked at Faith, who grinned back.

"If it is like you say, dear, maybe I should welcome you to the family, Faith.", Holland shook her hand and gave her a warm smile.

"Say, do I know your father?"

"Uhm, Hank Matthews. He's a lawyer...", Faith told him.

"Yes, of course.", Holland nodded.

"Say, Buffy. Have you danced with your brother, yet?", Darla made herself known once again.

Buffy blushed and shook her head, once more horribly embarrassed by her mother's bluntness.

"Angel, really. Haven't I taught you anything?", Holland scolded his son in a playful manner.

"It's the tradition that the best men dances with the maid of honor.", Darla pushed a little further. And Buffy was sure that if it hadn't been tradition, Darla would have invented another excuse.

"Well, we can't turn our backs on tradition...", Buffy muttered.

Angel cocked an eyebrow, the only one at the table having heard her.

"Shall we?", he stood up and did a little bow.

She took the hand he offered and followed him to the dancefloor. This didn't feel real. When, of course, a slow tune started and Angel pulled her a little closer, both their hearts seemed to skip a beat. Being so close again, being practically pushed towards each other, the music, them dancing, made them both dizzy. They moved closer and lost themselves in both the music and the moment. Heaven knew where they were going from here.

While Darla and Holland watched them, content with their day and their family, Faith observed them more closely. They looked so right together it was nearly impossible to think of them as siblings. She really hoped Buffy could deal with this. Perhaps time would help her with that. For now the only thing Faith could do was to be there for her friend if she needed her.

Buffy and Angel shared another dance, glancing at each other from time to time until the band took a break and they were forced to part.

"I wish this would last forever.", before he could stop them the words had left his mouth.

"Me, too.", she whispered.

Both shared a last, longing look.

"Let's just have fun today, ok?", Angel murmured behind her. They could deal with themselves another day.

Buffy grinned at him playfully before plopping herself on the chair and taking a sip from her glass.

Fun it was.

And fun it really was.

By and by Buffy was introduced to her father's friends. She and Faith spend some time trying to analyze people, their game becoming even funnier when Angel joined them. After the gigantic cake had been brought in and eaten, people started to leave one by one. It was already past 8 p.m. when the band left and Faith decided to take leave as well. She didn't want to somehow crash into the family day. So she hugged her friend and promised to call her the next day.

Darla and Holland soon excused themselves, not without reminding their children of the family breakfast the next morning.

"Oh God.", Buffy groaned. "I don't think I can ever eat anything again!"

Lilah smiled and nodded. "I'm rather tired...", she yawned. "I think I'm gonna go up to my room and take a long, hot bath."

So the only ones left were Buffy and Angel.

"Uhm, you wanna go upstairs, too?", she asked him.

"Not really. You?", he asked back.

"No. So...you wanna go to the bar?", she suggested.

"Okay.", he nodded.

They found a small table at the bar of the hotel and soon were sipping on their cocktails. After the first taste they both made a face.

"Not good?", he asked her.

She shook her head.

"Wanna try?", she offered her straw.

After tasting her drink he smiled and offered her his glass.

"Mmh, yum! Wanna switch?"

He grinned and soon both of them were sipping on their cocktails again.

And neither of them had missed the spark when their hands had touched accidentally.

They talked for hours, the feeling of intimacy becoming more and more evident. Just the fact that they were together again, without the events of the day nagging them or other people expecting them to act according to their roles. They were just Buffy and Angel, the chemistry they had from the start slowly returning. He told her anecdotes from his past, about Holland's and Lilah´s little ticks and about the house. She told him about how it was to live with Darla. They talked about their classes for the next semester and the upcoming parties. Both felt like on a first date, getting to know each other all over again. All the tension between them was gone, their body language becoming more playful with their occasional touches and looks. They were so lost in the magic of the moment that they forgot everything around them.

Finally, it was way past midnight, a waiter approached their table.

"Sir, Ma'am, I'm sorry, but we're closing now."

"Oh, yes. Of course.", Buffy replied and took Angel's hand to look at his watch.

"Oh boy...", she exclaimed.

"Shall I put it on the bill?", the waiter asked, gesturing at their empty glasses.

Angel nodded.

They walked together towards the elevator after getting their keys at the reception.

"Which floor?", she asked.

"Uhm, four.", he replied and pressed the button.

Buffy leaned against the wall, yawning.

"Tired?", he grinned.

"Yeah, a little. And God I need to get out of these shoes."

"They look good on you, tough.", he told her. Hell, everything looked good on her.

"Thanks.", she smiled. "They hurt like hell nevertheless."

"Women!", he exclaimed in mock desperation.

"Hey!", she smacked him on the arm playfully.

The elevator stopped and they entered a dark hallway.

"Ok. I have 419.", she checked the number on her key card. "You?"

"417.", he replied and pointed to the hallway on their left. "This way."

They walked together in silence until they stopped in front of his room. Both didn't want the evening to end and so they stood for a while until it became awkward.

"Thank you for the nice evening.", she finally whispered.

"The pleasure was mine.", he managed a half smile.

She was still looking at the floor and so he took a step forward and lifted her chin to meet her gaze.

"Hey. We'll be okay.", he told her gently.

She leaned into his touch.

"How can you know that?", she asked, meeting his eyes.

"I don't.", he admitted. She smiled weakly.

"Maybe we should go to bed now...", she sighed, taking a step backwards, breaking the contact.

But he stepped forward again.

"Good night to you then.", his voice sounded hoarse.

Like in slow motion his hand reached out to tuck a stray of hair behind her ear.

The memory of what had happened earlier that day came crushing down on them and before they knew it, they were in each other's arms, clinging together like they were drowning, kissing like there was no tomorrow. All their bottled up feelings and passion came to life when their lips locked and their tongues fought for dominance.

She gave a small sigh when he pressed her against the door, the kiss becoming more feverish with every second. There was no right or wrong, there was just their need for each other. Before he knew it, Angel had unlocked the door and they stumbled inside. Someone kicked the door shut and then Angel was kissing a wet trail down her neck while Buffy unbuttoned his shirt to feel his bare skin again. Both were panting and unable to stop what they had started.

Angel shrugged out of his jacket just to pull her back into his arms again, his hands roaming over the small of her back. He pulled the clips out of her hair to comb through her long, blonde tresses with his fingers, relishing in the silky feel of them. He breathed in her perfume and groaned. She smelled like heaven.

Buffy had finally managed to undo his bow tie and was now peppering his chest with tiny kisses, her hands tracing the cording muscles on his back. She reached up to kiss him again and he complied willingly. He felt a short pang of guilt when he reached for the zipper of her dress but his body betrayed him when he heard her breathy moan of appreciation. Her hands found his belt and he tucked down the straps of her dress, leaving her bare to his gaze except for her bra and thong panties. She stepped out of her dress, kicking off her high heels in the process and he marveled once more at how tiny she was.

Reaching for her again, he kissed her, her bare skin against his chest now, her hardening nipples teasing him. He kicked off his shoes when she started to work on his pants again as soon he stood before her, wearing nothing but boxers.

"So beautiful...", he murmured into her ear when his hand reached for the clasp of her bra. She rubbed her breasts against him, softly tracing his evident erection through the silk of his boxers.

He pushed her backwards until they reached the king sized bed and gently lowered her onto the mattress. She pulled him down with her and started to moan when he lowered his mouth to her left nipple. Her fingers were tangled in the spikes of his hair as she held him in place until he treated her other breast with the same attention. One of his hands ventured lower and found the waistband of her thong while he pressed against her leg.

"Please...", she moaned and blushed furiously at her wanton behavior. She didn't have to beg twice, he hooked his thumbs under the waistband to pull the thong from her. His boxers followed shortly afterwards and they were finally skin to skin, kissing and caressing each other with fever.

His fingers parted her outer lips and gently he dipped one finger just barely inside of her. She spread her legs wider and at the same time started to run her hand over his long, hard shaft. Both moaned between their kisses and when he finally pinched her clit hard, she exploded, muffling her cry by sucking his tongue deep into her mouth while she unconsciously squeezed him, hard. He almost lost it, too, and he knew he needed to be inside her, soon.

"Need...you...", she panted, her body flushed pink from her recent orgasm. Some part of her knew she was still a virgin, but she also knew that she needed him, now.

"I...", he needed a condom now. Glancing at the nightstand he spotted one and instantly grabbed it. He rolled it over his aching member and mumbled nonsensical love words into her ear.

Finally he was ready and poised at her entrance. He felt the goosebumps on her skin and gently caressed her face. Looking deep into her hazel eyes, he waited for her ok.

TBC...

I know I'm evil. *smirk* Promise to update very soon! Tell me what you think of this, please???

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Part 13 - Passion

Rating: NC-17

Feedback: please, please....did I say please?"

Dedication: HAPPY 1ST BIRTHDAY DENIALHAVEN!!!!! Ohgod, I can't believe it's already a year...thanks to all of you who visited the site and especially to those who took a while and gave us such lovely feedback! *hugs* Oh, and of course thanks to all those wonderful authors allowing us to post their fics :o)....to Hannahbee, my sister in crime ;o) You're the best! *smooch*, to everybody sending me feedback on this, THANKS!!!!

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She looked back at him and felt tears welling up in her eyes. In a moment of clarity she knew what they were about to do.

She nodded.

Angel let out a sigh of relief. He hadn't been sure what he would have done if she had denied him. He kissed the tears from her cheeks and then settled his lips on hers as he started to move. Careful not to cause her more than the inevitable pain, he massaged her clit as he broke through the barrier of her virginity. She tensed with the sharp pain that shot through her and he stilled, giving her time to get accustomed to him. With another look he confirmed if she was ok and as she started to move herself, he began a slow and tantalizing rhythm.

Soon they created a faster pace, the need overwhelming them once again. Angel felt that he wouldn't last much longer and wanted to take her with him. He angled his moves slightly and she gasped as new sensations washed over her. She thrust her hips up to meet him and with a final thrust he let go, feeling her muscles quiver around him as she gave a soft cry of pleasure.

He collapsed beside her, quickly tossing the condom away and cradling her close, peppering her face with kisses.

"God, I love you.", he whispered, his fingers tracing her damp skin.

"I love you, too.", she vowed, closing her eyes as he kissed her again.

They cuddled together in the aftermath of their lovemaking, a blanket now tucked safely around their intertwined bodies, falling asleep in each other's arms.

Buffy woke up the next morning when the telephone started to ring. Before she had time to realize that her back collided with a hard and muscular chest, that a leg was thrown over hers and a hand was sprawled possessively over her abdomen and intertwined with hers, the figure behind her shifted and pulled her with him.

"Yeah?"

"Good morning. This is your wake up call. It's 9 a.m."

Plop. The receiver was dropped and Buffy became fully awake. Her eyes opened and the shock in hers was met by dark brown ones holding the same expression. The realization of last night's events dawned on them and they broke apart.

Buffy clutched the sheets around her to cover her nakedness, even though she remembered that it might perhaps be a little late for that. Burying her face in her hands she rocked back and forth.

"Oh my god, oh my god...", she whispered.

Angel had fled to the other end of the bed, simply staring and softly shaking his head. Finally he dared looking at her again and their gazes met hesitantly.

"What have we done?", she asked after a while. She had really had sex with Angel last night. No, made love to him. Oh god, he was her brother! Even if she had been longing for him deep in her heart she should have stopped it! And she hadn't. Neither had he. Not even the excuse that there was alcohol involved would work, not even for herself. Neither of them had been drunk, barely tipsy maybe.

"I don't know.", he replied. How he have done this? Ok, he was still in love with her, but she was his sister for god's sake!

Buffy fled into anger.

"You don't know?", she spat. "I think we both remember what happened last night!"

"No, uhm, yes. Of course I remember.", he felt tears welling up inside him.

"How...how could we let this happen?", she begged him for the answer she couldn't find herself.

"Buffy, please.", he begged her to stop.

"God, Angel, do you realize what we have done?"

"Of course I know! God, Buffy, I know what we did. We made love. And we both wanted it. I know you're my sister but I know I would do it again!"

"STOP!", she yelled.

"Angel, please stop...", she whispered. She knew he was right. "This won't happen. Ever again. We can't!"

"I know.", he replied. "We can't do this. No matter how much I love you, I know I can't have you."

She cried hard by now. "How am I supposed to stay away from you?"

He made a move towards her, the need to comfort her, to take her into his arms overwhelming. But she flinched away from his touch.

Both fell silent again, trying to calm down. They had to forget what they had done. Even if it would cause their hearts to break.

Buffy jumped as the phone ran again. Angel took the receiver, answering with a hoarse voice.

"Angel? This is Holland. We're already downstairs, waiting for you."

"I´ll be down in a sec, Dad."

Buffy´s eyes flew up to him again.

"Oh, Angel? Could you check on Buffy? The manager said she didn't answer the phone."

"Sure.", Angel mumbled and put the receiver down absently.

"Ohgod, the breakfast!", Buffy´s eyes widened. How was she going to meet her family now?

Angel nodded. "Dad wants me to check on you, they know you didn't answer your phone."

"Oh god, they'll know...", she whispered.

"They won't. How could they?", he tried to reason her.

"I have to get dressed.", she remarked.

Both scanned the room, wincing at the sight of their strewn clothes. Angel discovered his boxers next to the bed and jumped into them. He quickly crossed the room and tossed his shirt towards her. She shrugged into it and joined his search. Finally they had found everything and got dressed in opposite corners of the room.

"Let's go.", he suggested.

"Are you mad?", she shot him an incredulous look.

He looked back at her, puzzled.

"I, we need to change! I can't go downstairs in this dress!"

She was probably right, Angel admitted. Nobody would expect it to be possible they had chosen to wear the same clothes they had worn yesterday.

"Go downstairs.", she advised him. "I´ll go change and follow you." Without another look at him she slipped out of the room. Tears threatened to come again but she mentally scolded herself and tried to calm down. Last night was better forgotten sooner than later. From now on, Angel was forbidden territory.

She started to undress and walked towards her bag, still untouched in the corner of her room. Quickly she put on a long black skirt and a baby blue shirt. She thanked the heavens for her choice in clothing as she discovered the love bite on her shoulder. Checking her reflection in the mirror she quickly washed her face and brushed her teeth. She needed to get the taste of his kisses out of her mouth. A little make up here and there would hide her slightly swollen eyes. She pulled her hair up into a casual pony tail and started for the door when her eyes settled on the bed. Quickly she ruffled the sheets as if she had slept in them.

"Oh god, what am I doing...", she thought.

Hugging herself tightly she stood for a while, a rush of images running through her mind.

Before she started to cry again she pulled herself out of her numbness and headed for the door. If she could get this breakfast just over and done with, she'd be fine.

First, pretending that everything was fine to her family had absolute priority. She stepped into the elevator and pushed the button. Her stomach suddenly went crazy and she had to concentrate hard not to throw up. Way too soon the doors opened again and Buffy started for the restaurant.

She slowed down a little when she saw the others sitting there. Darla and Holland were sitting next to each other on one side of the table, Lilah and Angel opposite to them. Buffy reached the empty chair at the short end of the table, coming to sit between her mother and Angel.

"Morning, sleepy.", her mother smiled at her. She looked good, Buffy had to admit. Happy.

"What?", Buffy replied, confused.

"Angel told us you overslept. You must be the hell of a sleeper if you can sleep through the ringing of that phone!", Lilah grinned.

Buffy blushed and quickly glanced at Angel, who avoided her eyes.

"Now that we're all here I think we can start.", Holland took his plate and walked towards the buffet. Lilah and Darla followed him.

"Thanks.", Buffy whispered quickly, when she and Angel got up as well.

He just nodded and turned around. After what happened earlier he had to admit that Buffy looked amazing. But he mustn't look at her, he scolded himself. They had to get through breakfast.

Soon they were all happily digging into their food, except Buffy who claimed that she wasn't that hungry after the tons of food the other day. Only Angel noticed her hands shaking when she lifted her cup. Darla, once again, did most of the talking, remembering yesterday and pointing out little details.

"Uhm, Buffy? Could you pass over the sugar, please?", Lilah interrupted Darla´s talk for once.

Buffy and Angel both reached for the sugar and their hands brushed against each other. Both practically jumped and pulled back immediately, causing Holland to laugh. Angel's eyes met Buffy´s for a second and then he passed over the sugar to Lilah. Darla observed the scene closely. She pulled Buffy with her to the buffet again.

"Buffy, I really appreciated you behavior yesterday.", she started. "You and Angel seemed to get along so well! It's a pity you seem to have pretended it all. Why can't you two seem to get along?"

Buffy, already having to deal with a turmoil of feelings, felt herself getting angry. Well Mom, you know, we got along so well yesterday that we ended up in bed and spend the night together, you know what I mean..., she thought. Avoiding Darla´s gaze, she shrugged, mumbling: "Dunno."

"Buffy, really. You two have to change that.", Darla more demanded then asked her.

"Geez Mom, I´ll try, okay?", Buffy shot out.

Her mother looked at her more closely.

"Sweetheart, what's wrong? You look different today...", she finally asked.

"Nothing. I'm fine.", Buffy croaked out, set her plate down on the table, causing Angel to jump both from her actions and her words. Did Darla say something to Buffy?

"Excuse me, bathroom.", Buffy mumbled and almost fled from the table.

"She never was a morning person...", Darla chirped while Buffy finally reached the bathroom and threw up the little she had forced into her stomach earlier. Ohgod. She couldn't do this. She couldn't go out there again. The whole situation was so unreal to her she felt like in the wrong movie.

She leaned heavily on the sink, rinsing her mouth and looking at herself in the mirror. Strangely, she felt a little better now. Gathering the last bit of her strength she walked to the door and entered the restaurant again.

Everybody seemed to have waited for her, again. Holland cleared his throat and started to talk: "I´d like to say a few things. First I want to thank you for the wonderful day, yesterday." He took Darla´s hand and smiled. "Darla and I are going to start our honeymoon in an hour. We'll be going to Hawaii for about three weeks. In the meantime Lilah will of course take care of the business." Lilah nodded. "You'll be in L.A. most of the time, I assume." Lilah nodded again.

"Which means that you and Buffy are going to have the house all to yourselves.", Holland addressed Angel with a smile.

Angel shared a short, shocked look with Buffy. Of course they were going to be alone, why hadn't he thought about that?

"I think you're old enough to know what this means.", Holland went on. "Angel, you will help Buffy to make herself at home, of course. One last thing for the both of you: do whatever you want, just make sure the house is still standing and clean when we get home." He smiled.

Buffy and Angel nodded automatically, even though a party was probably the last thing on their minds right now. Everybody else thought of it as a good idea that Buffy and Angel would have some time alone to get to know each other better. Maybe they would be able to become friends despite their obvious difficulties with each other. Sooner or later they would surely get the family vibe.

Breakfast was soon finished and Darla and Holland took off for the airport after a few more words of advise for their children. Another cab arrived and took Lilah, Angel and Buffy to the Manner's mansion.

Buffy was impressed by both the size and the style of the house. Compared to this the house on Revello Drive looked like a cabin. They took their bags and Lilah opened the front door. Angel immediately climbed up the stairs and disappeared.

"Come on.", Lilah smiled at Buffy. "I´ll show you your room. Or do you want the tour first?"

Buffy replied it was fine both ways and so they left their bags in the hallway and started the tour.

The interior of the house was even more impressive than the outside and Buffy couldn't help but feeling at home despite the enormous size of the rooms.

"Here we have the living room", Lilah continued after they had taken a look at the dining room, the kitchen and the library. "Oh and here you'll go outside to the pool."

A pool! Sure, Buffy thought. Of course such a house would have a pool. And a rather nice and big one, too, apparently. Really not that bad... They returned to the hallway again and picked up their bags before going upstairs.

At first, the first floor seemed to be one large hallway, stretching to both the right and the left side of the stairs. Lilah started for the right and dropped her bag once again. The first door on the right turned out to be a guest room and so they quickly passed on to the next door.

"This is my room, when I'm not in L.A. or somewhere else on a business trip.", Lilah smiled and Buffy took a curious step inside, trying to find out what the room might tell her about what kind of woman Lilah was. It was large with carefully selected furniture. In front of the window was a large desk full of papers and on the nightstand was a picture of Lilah, framed by Holland and Angel. The room suited Lilah, it was very clean and no stuff was lying on the ground or the bed, Buffy observed.

"It's nice.", Buffy turned around to smile at Lilah.

"Thanks."

The next door led to Holland's private study, dominated by an enormous desk and simple, brown, wooden drawers.

The door on the end of the hallway led into a room that was more like a suite. Obviously this was going to be Holland and Darla´s. The room was divided into two smaller ones, the first a living room with a sofa, a TV and bookshelves, the second one a beautiful bedroom with a king-sized bed. The suite might perhaps lack the touch of a woman, but Buffy was pretty sure Darla would take care of that. Another door led from the bedroom to a spacious bathroom.

"You think your mother's gonna like it?", Lilah asked.

"Absolutely!", Buffy assured her.

They returned to the hallway and until they reached the stairs again only took a short look into a broom closet full of boxes.

The left side of the house looked almost similar to the right one. Next to the stairs was another guestroom.

"This is Angel's room.", Lilah paused at the next door. "I think he's probably sleeping, so we better not disturb him."

Buffy could barely hide her relief. Somehow she didn't feel up to another encounter with him, yet.

On the other side of the door, Angel listened to Lilah and was glad he would be left alone.

The next door, the one opposite to Holland's suite at the far end of the hall, turned out to be another bathroom.

"This is the one you're going to share with Angel and me. I assure you, he's able to behave himself, so this shouldn't be the biggest problem."

Buffy grinned involuntarily. It had been a while since she had shared a bathroom with a male person. The bathroom was big. There was of course a sink, a shower, a toilet and a giant tub that looked rather like a whirlpool.

"Wow.", she remarked.

Lilah skipped the next door with a wink and Buffy felt her curiosity double up. Soon she would see her new room.

The room next to the one they left out was, to Buffy´s surprise, a small gym. Obviously the stuff had just been moved in there, since it looked a little chaotic. Sure the stuff had once been in another room.

"I found it quite handy, not having to drive all the way to a gym.", Lilah told her. "Makes it harder to invent excuses for not going. So...you like the house?", she asked anxiously.

"It's...wow. I'm really kinda speechless.", Buffy started. "It's great. I feel like in a small palace or something...it's...wow."

She smiled at Lilah who returned the gesture.

"Ok, then let's take a look at your room.", she left the gym, Buffy following her closely.

"Go ahead.", Lilah stopped. "Open the door."

Buffy stepped forward and turned the knob.

She opened the door and had to stand still for a while. The room was flooded by light through the large windows. There was a beige carpet on the floor, obviously new, the walls were simply white and the curtains at the window were of a light blue shade. Her own bed stood on the left side, a large closet on the right side of it. Buffy recognized her own desk and shelves, as well as the numerous boxes all over the room.

"I hope you like what I picked?", Lilah asked carefully as Buffy started to walk into the room.

"It's wonderful.", Buffy almost whispered. The room was big. And she instantly liked it. Relief flooded her by the thought of calling this place her home, only now did she realize how worried she had been.

"You're of course free to change whatever you like!", Lilah quickly added.

"I love it, really.", Buffy smiled. She was already thinking about how to arrange the furniture and her other stuff.

"I´d really like to help you.", Lilah said. "But I have to go to L.A. today and I need to pack my things..."

"No biggie.", Buffy tried to assure her. "I´ll just call Faith..."

"Oh, of course.", Lilah smacked her head. "Here's your phone...". She went over to the nightstand. "I wrote down your number, in case you want to give it to your friends. And here are your keys."

"Thanks.", Buffy repeated once again. "How long will you be gone?"

"It's hard to tell right now. All week most definitely, and next week, too. I´ll try to come back for the weekend but...".

"Oh, you have a lot of work?", Buffy asked. So she and Angel would indeed be alone most of the time.

"You betcha.", Lilah grimaced. "But I like going to L.A., so it makes up for the work."

"Uhm...I don't wanna keep you...", Buffy continued hesitantly.

"You're not. I´d really like to spend the day with you but...duty calls.", Lilah apologized.

"Ok. I´ll just get my bag and then see if Faith wants to come over."

Lilah followed her back to the stairs and then disappeared into her room. Buffy wandered back to her room and paused for a minute, looking at the closed door to Angel's room. Then she went into her own room, sat down on the bed and dialed Faith's number.

Faith arrived a short while later and Buffy now gave her the tour through the house. Her friend was just as impressed as Buffy had been or probably still was.

"Wow, this place rocks.", she observed in typical Faith-fashion.

"Oh yeah.", Buffy could only add.

They went up to Buffy´s room and were soon laying on the bed next to each other.

"So, you already know where we start?", Faith asked her friend.

"Mmh, I was thinking about getting the boxes with all my clothes out of the way first...", Buffy replied. Since the closet was already there it'd probably be the best strategy.

Both hopped off the bed, pulling the numerous boxes next to the closet. While unpacking them, they chatted easily.

"So, what happened after I left yesterday?", Faith suddenly asked.

"Uhm, nothing...really. I had a few drinks at the bar with Angel and then went to bed.", Buffy answered hesitantly. And that was of course after one or two orgasms while I did him for a while. She felt bad for not telling her friend everything. She'd never kept secrets from Faith. She had been the one person she found she couldn't and wouldn't lie to, ever. But how could she tell her about what had happened last night? Faith would be shocked, of course, but perhaps understanding the whereabouts, knowing the history of Buffy and Angel as the only one. No. Buffy couldn't look her in the eye during her lies. And Faith didn't suspect anything, well, a little perhaps.

"You guys seemed to be pretty comfortable, yesterday.", Faith remarked. She had been surprised the two former lovers had gotten along so well. But there couldn't be more, right?

"You know what Darla wanted from me.", Buffy replied shortly.

"Yeah, of course.", Faith nodded. "I think it must have been tough."

"Actually, it was easier than I thought.", Buffy replied honestly.

"So you guys are five by five now?"

"Dunno. Haven't seen much of him all day."

"Maybe you just need some time...", Faith suggested.

Buffy nodded absently. Sure, time would solve everything.

The spent the whole day working, unpacking boxes, putting pictures on the walls, making Buffy´s room her home. In the end they collapsed on the bed, spent.

"I didn't know I had so much stuff.", Buffy groaned.

Faith snorted her agreement.

Suddenly there was a knock on the door.

"Yeah?", Buffy answered and was relieved when Lilah entered the room.

"Oh my god, wow!", Lilah exclaimed. "You're already finished. Hi Faith."

Faith smiled while Buffy awaited Lilah´s judgement.

"It looks so nice. Almost like you've been here forever."

"Thanks."

"I just wanted to say goodbye. I'm heading for L.A.", Lilah told them.

Buffy went over to hug her sister goodbye while Faith remained on the bed. Lilah was going to L.A., leaving Buffy and Angel all alone? Uh oh.

"How long will you be gone?", she quickly asked.

"Uhm, about two weeks, I guess. I´ll try to be home on the weekend.", Lilah replied.

"Call me if you have any questions.", she told Buffy. "And I don't know what's up with Angel but I assure you, he's usually not that grumpy. Maybe you can loosen him up a bit."

Buffy quickly smiled and then Lilah was out of the room again.

Angel heard a knock on the door and looked up from his book. He had felt like a coward, staying in his room all day. But he needed time to think about what had happened last night. He knew, he should probably ask if Buffy needed help with her room. Incredible gladness had swept over him when he had heard Faith arrive. So he had tried to distract himself by reading a book. Usually he'd found the lecture to be very interesting but somehow his thoughts constantly kept wandering back to last night. He had finally made love to Buffy and it had been perfect in every sense. But he also knew they had practically committed a crime. It had been incest and Buffy was still under 21. Dammnit, how was he supposed to have brotherly feelings for the one girl he was not only incredibly attracted to but deeply in love with? How could he get her out of his mind? The knock on the door startled him. Please let it be her, no don't let it be her...

"Yeah?", he finally croaked out. "Lilah.", he remarked with relief when the door opened.

"I just wanted to tell you I'm gone now.", his sister told him.

"Okay. Got everything?", he asked her.

"Yes."

"Be careful."

"Thanks, I´ll try.", she smiled. "And Angel?"

"Yeah?"

"Take care of Buffy, ok? I know it's not easy but she'll need you around the next days. Don't shut her out."

"I won't.", he replied. He just didn't know how to deal with her.

"Be good.", Lilah winked and closed the door. Angel heard her leave the house and listened to her car pulling out of the driveway.

"You didn't tell me you'd be alone with him for the next two weeks!", Faith looked at Buffy, not knowing whether to be surprised or to be angry.

"Guess I kinda forgot.", Buffy replied sheepishly.

"And you're ok with that?"

"What choice do I have?", Buffy asked back. "I´ll be ok."

"You sure?", Faith dug a little deeper. "You know I could at least spend the night....".

"That's sweet, but I'm sure it's ok.", Buffy hugged her best friend. "Angel and I need to get along. I can't always hide behind you or someone else.", Buffy hoped she sounded convincing. To be honest, she wasn't sure if she'd be able to sleep at all, knowing he was just across the hall.

"Ok. I´ll go.", Faith nodded. Buffy escorted her to the front door.

"Sleep tight. And you know that everything you dream the first night in a new home comes true.", Faith smiled.

Buffy hugged her tightly. "Thanks. For everything."

Faith hugged her back. "I´ll call you tomorrow."

"Bye."

Buffy closed the door and took a deep breath. Now they were really alone. Silently she trotted down the hallway to her room. She still needed to move her stuff into the bathroom. However this was done quickly and after taking a shower she decided to check her e-mails. Apparently a few of her friends had tried to contact her, asking for her new number and of course when the moving-in-party at the new house would take place. Ben wanted to talk to her. Buffy smiled and lost herself for a while, making a mental note to call Ben the next day.

It was already dark outside when her stomach reminded he that she hadn't been eating all day. Deciding to check if there was some food in the fridge she switched the light off and started for the kitchen.

She had barely entered the hallway when she suddenly collided with something that resembled a large, muscular and bare chest. Oh god, Angel! She quickly drew back and lost her balance. But before she fell, he caught her, steadying her with his hands on her upper arms. Just the mere contact of his skin with hers ignited a new turmoil of feelings in both of them.

"Sorry.", she mumbled, avoiding his gaze.

"Careful.", he replied softly, still not releasing her from his grip.

Oh god, there she was, dressed in sweats and a baby T-shirt, right in front of him. He had started working out when he heard her enter the shower and there she was now. Slowly, his thumb caressed her arm. Her eyes flew up to meet his for a brief second.

"Uhm...I...gotta go.", she stuttered and before he could stop her she had fled from him. Time for another cold shower...

Tbc.... Tell me what you think about this part?!

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Part 14 - Living Conditions

Rating: NC-17

Feedback: Thanks for all the wonderful feedback on this! You guys encourage me to keep this going! So, please...keep responding! :o)

Dedication: to my twin Hannahbee *smooch*, to Leni, because I miss her *hugs*

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It would have been the understatement of the year to describe the situation at the Manner's mansion as awkward. During the next few days Buffy and Angel spent a good deal of their time ignoring each other. The rest of the time they tried to get their thoughts sorted out. What happened between them at the hotel clouded their every move and thought, even followed them into their dreams. So they avoided each other, only exchanging the minimum amount of pleasantries or information. Every time one of them entered a room and found the other to be already there a lame excuse came up, giving one of them the reason and opportunity to leave.

Buffy was glad that Faith came over every day, either to pick her up or to stay with her, so she had someone to talk to. Together they tried to arrange their schedules for the upcoming semester, just hung out at the pool or met the others.

Angel stayed in his room, trying to shut out the sight and sound of her, pretending to be busy. He didn't feel like going out, he just wanted to forget. Lilah called at least once a day, asking if everything was ok, and he lied to her, telling her that they were fine and grown up and that Lilah didn't need to come home for the weekend. She fell for it, hook, line and sinker.

When Angel entered the kitchen one evening he found a battlefield. Every closet was opened, pans and pots strewn over the floor, Buffy in the middle of it. Angel stopped at the doorframe, once again captured by the sight of her. She was wearing thin cotton pants and a pink baby T-shirt that already bore marks of her attempt to cook. Shaking his head, he pulled his eyes away from her.

"Uhm, what exactly are you doing here?", he asked, trying not to sound too harsh.

She jumped, startled by his presence and words.

"Cooking.", she huffed at him, instantly regretting her tone.

"Oh. And here I was thinking you were searching for something.", he snorted, already turning around to leave the room.

"I can't find the flour.", she muttered, almost inaudible.

He smiled, imagining the pout that he was sure was on her lips right now before he turned around.

"You could have asked.", he told her as he reached up to one of the top shelves.

"Right.", she snorted. "Like I would dare disturbing you!"

"Look. You know Lilah told you to ask if you needed anything."

"I know what Lilah said.", she raised he voice a little. "But I think you also made clear that you don't want anything to do with me."

"Buffy, please...", he stepped forward, beginning to look behind her facade.

"What, Angel? You can't even stand the sight of me anymore? Am I that horrible to you, now that we...", she sobbed, but tried to stifle it immediately.

"Oh, like you weren't avoiding me...", Angel knew he was probably being unfair, but found himself unable to stop. "You didn't talk to me either!"

"I know. Because I didn't know what to say!", she almost shouted. "You made it perfectly clear that you don't want anything to do with me, now that you got what you wanted...".

A short silence followed her words.

"You think I just wanted to fuck you and then leave you?", Angel asked in disbelief. "Buffy, you're my sister! And I know it was wrong what we did. What WE did. God, the only reason I'm not talking to you is...", he stopped.

She looked at him, her big eyes blurred with tears. "What, what is it?"

"The only reason I'm not talking to you, that I'm avoiding you is...", he took a deep breath and looked at her. "...because every time I see you, all I want is to take you in my arms, to kiss you."

They stared at each other, the silence now thick and heavy between them.

Then she took a few steps forward while he crossed the last bit of distance between them at the same time. Before either of them knew it, they were in each other's arms, kissing like their lives depended on it. He pulled her closer while she twined her arms around his neck, trying to get closer, to deepen the kiss, to drink each other in with all the bittersweetness possessing them. Their tongues dueled seemingly endless until they broke apart, panting.

"Oh god.", Buffy gasped, stepping backwards until her back collided with the kitchen counter.

"Oh god.", Angel echoed, burying his face in his hands. He closed his eyes and then he heard her bare feet slowly retreating from the room until she fled upstairs and slammed the door to her room shut behind her.

After a few hours that she spent trying to calm down and once more sorting out the turmoil of feelings inside her, Buffy was lying on her bed, flipping through a magazine. She was startled by a knock on the door. It could only be one person.

"Yeah?", she called, hoping her voice sounded steady.

The door opened and Angel carefully stepped inside. He hadn't seen her room before and was taken aback by the sight of it. Looking around, he didn't realize what he was doing until Buffy cleared her throat.

"Uhm...did you want something?", she asked, frowning.

"Oh.", he felt caught and blushed a little. "I, uhm, I wanted to apologize."

"Apologize?"

"Yeah. For yelling at you, for avoiding you, for...you know...", he trailed off.

"Oh. Me too, I mean...I wasn´t exactly fair either...", she started hesitantly

"I know it's...difficult between us...but I don't want to ignore you.", he admitted. It was true.

"I don't wanna ignore you either.", Buffy felt close to tears again.

"Maybe, if we take things slowly, we...I´d like to spend time with you."

"Me, too.", she smiled. It was probably going to be hard but they both knew they needed to get along somehow. Being together like friends was better than not being together at all, right?

He sighed with relief.

"So...you got any plans tomorrow?", Buffy asked.

"No.", he shook his head. "Would you...maybe want to rent a movie and order pizza then?"

She smiled and nodded. He gave her one of his halfsmiles and started towards the door.

"I like what you did to the room.", he told her.

"Thanks. Good night, Angel."

"Good night, Buffy.", he replied before he closed the door.

That night both of them slept quietly, feeling incredibly relieved that they were good again, somehow.

The following day seemed to pass quickly and before Angel had time to wonder about what he had actually done all day he found himself once again at Buffy´s door. Just as he raised his hand to knock, the door opened and both couldn't help but laugh.

Chuckling, Angel finally asked: "I just wanted to go get the movie...do you have a wish or something?"

"That's what I wanted to ask you...", Buffy grinned. "Would you mind if I came along? We could pick one together then."

"Sure."

Half an hour later they were back in the living room, Pizza on the table, drinks ready.

"So, the lady chooses. Which one first?", Angel held up "Minority Report" and "The Fellowship of the Ring".

"Mmh, elves first, please.", she quipped and made herself comfortable on the large couch.

"As you wish...", Angel faked a bow and put the DVD into the player before he sat down on the other end of the couch.

Soon they lost themselves in the movie, the last bit of tension between them forgotten for the moment.

What others would have classified as a date was incredibly healthy for their relationship. When they had finished the second movie, Buffy almost fell asleep on the couch but both agreed to repeat the event as soon as possible.

The next two days seemed to fly by. Getting to know each other's routines better, Buffy and Angel soon spend much time together. They had breakfast together in the morning, spend their days as the pool and talked a lot. Although they were aware of avoiding certain topics or any closer physical contact, they found out they liked spending time together. The chemistry they had from the moment they met became more and more apparent each time they were together. Faith joined them from time to time, somehow glad to see that Buffy was looking better again. Perhaps the two of them had really found a way of getting along.

The first week of their alone-time was already over. Lilah called on Friday, telling them she needed to work and couldn't come home for the weekend.

During breakfast on Saturday morning it became obvious that they really needed something to eat for the next week. Hence a trip to the supermarket followed. Together they picked out everything they needed and wanted, laughing about their little habits and preferences until an old woman neither of them knew complimented Buffy about her handsome boyfriend while they stood at a counter. Buffy blushed furiously and before she knew it stuttered something about Angel being her brother.

"Really.", the woman asked. "What a pity. You two make such a lovely couple. I've watched the two of you and..."

Buffy excused herself and fled, dragging Angel along with her, who had managed to catch the last bit of the conversation. Both avoided to talk about it on their way home.

This night they went to the Bronze together, meeting Faith, Dawn, Gunn and Anya there. It wasn't as crowded as usual so there was plenty of space for the girls to take over the dancefloor while Gunn and Angel preferred to visit Oz at the bar. Even if he found out that he liked Gunn very much, it didn't escape Angel's notice that Buffy and Faith once more had the attention of almost every male in the place. Of course the pair looked stunning as usual. When he had seen Buffy in that white mini skirt and black halter top, he had sucked in a sharp breath. God, she was sexy. Faith of course didn't have to hide her body either, nor did she intend to do so. She wore low rise blue jeans and a red top that made Angel wonder for a second how it managed to hold everything in place. No wonder every man would probably kill to get a hand on them.

It wasn't like nobody dared trying, at some point of the night there were so many guys surrounding them, they were barely visible.

"Don't you worry `bout Anya?", Angel finally asked Gunn.

"Nah.", the man next to him laughed. "Not as long as she's going home with me. Besides I´d rather worry `bout our other girls." He winked. "Your little sister looks pretty hot tonight."

Angel nodded absently while his eyes settled on the dancefloor again.

When they were back in the car, Buffy didn't have to ask to know that something was wrong with Angel. But she did anyway.

"What's wrong? You seem a little grumpy...", she asked hesitantly.

"Nothing."

"Come on, you have something-face...", she knew she was pushing him.

"Why do you care anyway? I saw you making quite a few friends tonight."

"Oh please.", she sighed. "You're jealous?"

He blushed a little. "Maybe a little...", he finally admitted.

"Don't be...", she whispered barely audible and touched his shoulder lightly.

After letting Buffy out in front of the house, Angel parked the car and went inside when he heard music from the living room. Curious, he followed and found Buffy waiting for him.

"Can I have this dance?", she asked, her voice the one of a little girl.

Like he could deny her anything! Slowly, he walked up to her and touched her shoulders lightly. Smiling she pulled her arms around his waist as they started to move to the soft beat. They lost themselves in the moment and both were sad when the song ended all too soon.

"Thanks.", she whispered.

"Pleasure was mine.", he tried to sound playful.

She yawned and smiled sheepishly. "I´ll better go to bed now...".

"I´ll just get something to drink....good night.", he smiled back at her. "Breakfast at 10 tomorrow?", she asked.

He nodded and turned around.

"Sweet dreams.", she called, when she was already at the stairs.

Angel went to the fridge and after giving it a second thought grabbed a beer.

"Sweet dreams.", he whispered, leaning on the counter heavily.

Angel was up early, considering he'd gone to bed pretty late, or better make that early, too. He was already rummaging around in the kitchen when he heard the by now familiar padding of bare feet on the tiles.

"Morning.", a gruff voice greeted him.

"Morning sunshine.", he replied, smiling as he heard another yawn.

"It's raining."

He chuckled. "Want some coffee?", he asked and turned around.

Even if she was still rumpled from sleep, she looked gorgeous.

"Please." She climbed one of the bar stools at the big counter in the middle of the kitchen. She opened her mouth to speak again but stopped, amazed as he poured coffee into a big mug and added the exact amount of milk and sugar before handing it to her.

"Thanks.", she smiled brightly.

"I was thinking about pancakes, you want some?"

"Mmh, heaven...", she sighed dreamily.

"Pancakes it is...", he mumbled as he watched her drink her coffee.

"Dough or cream?"

"Huh?", she replied.

"Wanna make the dough or whip the cream?"

"Cream.", she decided quickly.

Soon they were both busy with their part of making breakfast.

"Wanna try?", he gestured towards the dough.

She dipped her finger inside the bowl and carefully licked the dough from it. It was probably the most erotic thing he'd ever seen. "Don't go there", he scolded himself inwardly.

"Mmh, good.", she purred, completely unaware of his stare.

She returned to the cream and Angel started cleaning some fresh strawberries. A sudden "oops" startled him out of his thoughts.

"What?", he asked.

"Uhm, I kinda slipped the sugar.", she grinned a little uneasy. "I hope it's not too sweet now...".

He cocked an eyebrow. "Define kinda.", he teased her.

"Uhm, wanna try?"

He gestured to his hand, red and covered with strawberry juice.

"Oh.", she dipped her own finger into the cream and offered it to him, once more completely unaware of what she was doing.

Angel on the other hand was fully aware of her offer and hesitated for a second before he gave in to temptation and opened his mouth. His tongue came out and swirled around her finger, tasting the cream that was horribly sweet. Not having the heart or the willpower to pull away, he licked along the finger, making sure he got every drop. He realized that she was staring at him now, but couldn't resist sucking her finger into his mouth before releasing it. Slowly, he licked his lips and dared to look at her.

Quickly she pulled her hand away and wiped it clean with a towel.

"And?" Pretend nothing has happened, Buffy. Great.

"Sweet." His voice sounded hoarse and he quickly cleared his throat.

"Ok...good.", she mumbled.

Buffy put out the plates and syrup while Angel was busy baking a pile of pancakes that was probably enough for a small army. Her stomach rumbled loudly and both had to grin.

"I think we should probably start, I can't risk you starving to death.", he finished another pancake, just as his stomach rumbled even louder.

"Look who's talking.", she teased him, glad that the moment of tension was over, before she hopped on her stool again.

The next minutes passed by silently while they were happily digging in. After the first hunger was stilled they started experimenting with the various syrups, marmalades and the cream, occasionally feeding each other little pieces of pancake. The intimacy of the situation went unnoticed by the two of them as they lost themselves in the moment once again.

"Uff, I'm stuffed.", Buffy finally announced, licking her fingers clean.

"You sure?" Angel loved watching her eat. Hell he'd probably love watching her doing the laundry!

"Hell yes.", she sighed happily. Then she realized the mess they left in the kitchen.

"This isn't gonna vanish, right?", she grimaced.

"Mmh, I tried a few times, never happened.", Angel shrugged.

Groaning in defeat, they started to make the kitchen presentable again. Not sure who started it, they were soon engaged in a battle of splashing water at each other from all over the kitchen. Soon they were both laughing, but almost completely soaked and the kitchen was flooded.

It took quiet a while until they were really finished, both exhausted from laughter and completely wet. Wiping some droplets from her cheek, Buffy was unprepared when Angel attacked her again. Before she could react he had grabbed her and poked her in the ribs.

She shrieked and fought to get free.

"Angel...that tickles!"

"That's the point, Buffy", he underlined his confession with a mischievous grin and another poke in her side.

This time she wiggled and laughed so hard she almost slipped and fell to the floor. He caught her and she used their new position to search for his vulnerable spot.

"Ah, you wanna do this the hard way!", he teased her and attacked again until she claimed she was going to die.

"Ok. Break.", he panted.

As soon as he released her, she had slipped past him and fled from the kitchen. He followed her immediately, but she had quite a head start.

"Just wait 'til I catch you!", he mock threatened while running up the stairs.

She didn't stand a chance and when she reached her room he was inside before she had the opportunity to lock the door.

She shrieked and fled, but in vain. He finally managed to grab her and together they fell on the bed. He landed on top of her and immediately had her squirming with his new attack. But then she surprised him by managing to get free and straddle him, grabbing his wrists, for a second thinking she'd actually be able to hold him in place.

"Ok. Definitely the hard way.", he grinned before he realized that the hardest thing right now was probably the growing erection pressed against her intimate places.

Within seconds the playfulness was gone and they stared at each other, dead serious. Their eyes met and both were unable to move.

Angel opened his mouth to speak but the only word that came out in a pant was her name: "Buffy."

"Angel", she echoed, slowly releasing his wrists.

Once again they both seemed to act on auto-pilot when their mouths met, teasingly at first, but soon with all the desperate longing eating at them. He pulled her flush against him, roaming his hands over her back, the damp shirt she wore. Her hands cupped his face, exploring every inch of it until he once again rolled them over. Loving the feel of his weight pressing down on her, she parted her legs so that he came to rest between them. God, had she missed this.

He moaned in appreciation, letting her feel how happy exactly he was by pressing closer. She once more squirmed beneath him, but this time she didn't want to escape. She wanted more of him, closer, now. While Angel kissed a wet path down her neck, she tugged on his shirt until he complied and let her pull it off. His hands found their way to her breasts, softly cupping them before venturing down, underneath her shirt that was gone an instant later. Almost skin to skin, they both moaned when he placed a trail of wet, open-mouthed kisses on every rib until he started suckling one nipple through the thin fabric. It hardened immediately under his talented ministrations and Buffy thrashed, moaning his name.

"Please.", she finally managed to get out and he reached to unclasp her bra, leaving her bare to his gaze.

"So beautiful.", he murmured against her skin, before moving towards the other nipple. "So soft, so sweet...".

Buffy´s hands were buried in his hair, caressing him where she could reach him until she suddenly pushed him away and on his back again.

"My turn.", she announced before she started kissing every inch of his muscular chest. Suckling at his nipples until they ached, she glanced down towards the bulge in his pants and felt a rush of heat run through her.

Her hands found the button and zipper and she watched his eyes widen as she slipped one hand inside to caress the throbbing erection awaiting her.

With almost a growl he flipped them once again, shucking out of his pants in the process, before he started to work down her own pants. Starting at her feet, he kissed every toe, wandered slowly up her legs until he reached the apex of her thighs. He looked up at her again, searching her face for hesitation but found it flushed and glowing with pleasure.

He moved up her body to kiss her again, his left hand tugging at her nipple once more, so that she moaned into his mouth. His right hand ventured lower and started to softly stroke her where her panties were already wet. She moved her hips against his hand, impatient, still wanting more of him. Carefully he pealed the material aside, dipping one finger inside her wet and still so very tight channel while his thumb lazily circled her clit. Every remaining rational thought fled from their brains with the sensation.

"Oh god, Angel.", she moaned, thrusting her hips up.

"Patience, love.", he whispered while he slowly build her up, adding a second finger in her tight heat but still denying her the release she begged for until her head was thrashing on the bed and she was almost sobbing.

"So sensitive, so responsive...", he murmured against her neck and finally added the pressure she needed on that small bundle of nerves, sending her into a powerful climax.

When she had stopped shaking, he withdrew his fingers, licking them clean while she watched him, her heavy lidded eyes widening again. He leaned down to kiss her, marveling at the wonder of her and she realized she was able to taste herself on him.

"I love you.", he whispered, while he pulled first her panties off and then shimmied out of his boxers.

"I love you, too. God, I love you so much.", she replied, once again spreading her legs for him.

Losing himself in her confession and the love in her eyes, he entered. He filled her perfectly and she closed her eyes at the sensation.

"Look at me.", he pleaded, waiting until she opened her eyes again.

"Make love to me.", she whispered. That was his undoing. Unable to wait anymore, he started to move, careful at first, knowing that she was still so new to this, but then passion overwhelmed them and they made love with all their desperation and love for each other until the world seemed to come crashing down on them. Clinging together like they were drowning, kissing, drinking each other in, finding a perfect rhythm that catapulted them into oblivion.

Buffy screamed as another climax rippled through her and Angel thrust once more before he filled her with his release.

He collapsed on top of her, caressing her damp hair until he suddenly started to pull away.

"Ohgod.", he groaned.

Buffy looked at him worried. "What?"

"We...we didn't use anything...", he stammered.

"Oh.", she said. "Uhm, I'm...I'm on the pill."

Incredible relief flooded him. The he looked at her again and asked: "Why?"

She blushed and tried to look away but he held her in place. "I...I started taking it when we...when we didn't know and...I kinda never stopped."

"I love you.", he told her. She hadn't thought about others.

"Love you, too."

They lay together in silence, trying to understand what just happened. They had done it again. Of course, there was shock about the forbidden lovemaking, but both couldn't help feeling that this was right. They loved each other, how could that be wrong?

TBC...

Oops they did it again....but how will they go on? Send Feedback and take a guess! Please? :o)

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Part 15 - Where the wild things are

Rating: still NC-17, oh yeah!

Feedback: thanks for all the great feedback so far *beams Please...don´t stop!

Dedication: to Netti cause I missed her very much last week, to Hannah, hoping to see you, soon! ;o), to all of you liking this!

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When he felt her shiver slightly, Angel pulled the blanket around them and together they lay in silence, occasionally dozing off. Both reflected about what had happened, sensing that their second forbidden lovemaking had changed something. The first time could probably be written off as an accident but both knew this excuse wouldn't work a second time. They had been perfectly aware of what they were doing. And as bad as they should probably feel about it, they weren't. Too much happiness about holding the love of their lives in their arms overcame the nagging guilt.

Buffy was the first one to speak after a while.

"Angel?", she whispered, carefully searching his face for a reaction.

"Mmh?", he rumbled, pulling her closer involuntarily.

"What happens now?" There. She did it. She had asked the question hovering above them.

"Do you regret what happened?", he asked, afraid of her answer.

"I know I should. I know I should feel guilty, because it's wrong. But I can't. All I can think about is that this, here and now, is the best thing that's ever happened to me."

He kissed her gently, pulling her even closer. "I know the feeling."

"So...", she started again.

"I don't know what to do, Buffy. I don't know...all I know is that I love you. And that I want this, with you. Some part of me tells me to run, to leave, but I know I can't. I can't just pretend to have brotherly feelings for you. I tried, believe me. God, I love you so damn much."

Once again they lost themselves in a long and deep kiss.

"So, we stay together?", she asked. "Even if that means to hide, to lie to our friends and family?"

"How could I let you go?", he whispered.

"Don't." She snuggled into him and together they fell asleep.

They woke again when the phone started to ring and as much as Angel tried to convince her to just let it ring, Buffy decided to answer it.

It was Faith.

"Hey, what's going on?", Buffy heard her best friend on the other end.

"Uhm, nothing...", she lied.

"Listen, Dawnie just called to tell me her parents decided to move back to LA. I called Gunn and we thought we could meet and talk about a going-away party."

"Yeah, sure.", Buffy tried her best to stay focussed on the phone and to ignore Angel's naked body next to her.

"Okay, I'm gonna pick you up in...let's say 30 minutes?", Faith asked her.

"Uhm, yeah...", Buffy replied before she knew what she did and hung up the phone.

As she was making a move to get out of bed, Angel pulled her back.

"Where are you going?", he asked, kissing her shoulders.

"Angel, please. Faith's gonna be here in 30 minutes. I have to take a shower and get ready...", she pleaded.

"Damn.", he muttered, turning her around to kiss her properly.

She moaned into his mouth, losing herself in his embrace.

"Keep that up and I´ll never get out of bed...", she sighed, finally.

"Oh. Good.", he grinned and kissed her again.

"Angel, please!", she whined. "Shower, now! Oh god...she'll notice...". Sudden panic welled up inside her.

Angel realized the gravity of the situation and pulled away from her. Handing her his shirt, he watched her rummage through the closet for something to wear.

"Come here...", he whispered.

She looked at him and couldn't resist the follow his plea. How could she resist him?

"I know we have to be careful.", he told her. "Go, shower." With a final kiss he pushed her off, towards the bathroom.

When Buffy returned from the shower 15 minutes later, the room was empty. Ignoring the ache in her heart, she smiled as she saw he'd made the bed and placed her clothes over a chair.

"Careful.", she whispered.

Quickly she got dressed and was ready when Faith was at the front door.

"Ready, girlfriend?", the brunette hugged her.

Buffy opened her mouth to say yes but ended up saying "In a second" instead. Faith watched her run up the stairs and grinned, wondering what her best friend had forgotten. She didn't see Buffy burst into Angel's room, where he was lying on the bed reading.

Angel looked up when the door opened and before he knew it, Buffy had kissed him passionately. He pulled her closer for another kiss, but she stiffened in his arms and didn't give in to it fully.

"See you later?", she asked.

Smiling, he nodded and before he could blink she was already gone.

"Ready.", Buffy announced downstairs and together Faith and Buffy ran towards the car through the pouring rain.

It was already dark outside when Buffy entered the house again. Faith, Gunn, Anya and Lorne had dragged her to the movies after they had organized the party. Buffy didn't come up with a convincing excuse to go home and ended up having fun as always when they were together. But now that she was home, all her thoughts returned to Angel again.

There was light in the living room and when she stepped closer she saw Angel sitting on the couch, watching a quiz show, obviously bored. He looked so adorable that she couldn't help but smile. Without giving it a second thought she walked to the couch and climbed into his lap as he finally looked up at her.

Angel's heart skipped a beat when he heard her come home, finally. When she snuggled up to him without a word, he was sure he fell in love with her all over again. He took her into his arms without hesitation, breathing in her scent.

"Hey.", she whispered against his neck after a while.

"Hey.", he replied, gently tracing her spine with his thumb.

She moved to lean her forehead against his, looking deep into his eyes. Her lips softly brushed against his before his hands came up to pull her closer, so that he could kiss her properly. For the next couple of minutes they rediscovered each other's mouths again, their kisses alternating between soft nibbling and a mating of their tongues.

How could he ever get enough of her? Angel didn't know. All that he wanted to do was worship her in every possible way just for her sweet, innocent "Missed me?" that she quipped when his mouth moved to her earlobe.

"Didn't you notice?", he teased her, pulling her against his hardening shaft, loving the way her face flushed when she got the hint.

"I think I'm getting your point.", she smiled impishly and kissed him passionately.

Her hands found their way underneath his shirt, softly scraping his naked skin. He moaned into her mouth and started to tug on her top, wanting to feel her soft skin again, too. Their mouths only parted long enough to let him pull the shirt over her head. His fingers gently traced her shoulders and then moved lower to the mound of her breasts, spilling out of the bra with every panting breath she made. Buffy pressed closer, wanting him to touch her, to ease the ache inside her that only burned for him. Her hands ventured lower and between their bodies to grip his hard cock through his pants.

"God, Buffy.", Angel moaned, knowing that he would take her right here, right now, in the living room, if she kept that up.

"You feel so good...need...", she panted, flushing with passion.

Angel lifted her to undo her pants but stilled when the doorbell rang.

"Let it ring.", Buffy mimicked his words from earlier that day. "We're not here."

Angel groaned when the bell ran again. As much as he hated doing this, he lifted her off of his lap. Handing her the shirt.

"I'm sorry.", he gave her a peck on the lips before he started for the front door. Willing his erection to go down, he yelled: "Coming!", making sure Buffy was dressed before he opened the door.

It was Giles, grinning at him. "Hi."

"Oh, hi!", Angel greeted his friend, stifling the urge to slam the door in his face, gesturing for him to come in.

Giles cocked an eyebrow, taking in his friend's rumpled condition.

"Uhm, is this a bad time?", he whispered.

"Huh?"

"Oh, nothing. I just thought I´d stop by. Didn't think about you maybe having company. Buffy chose this moment to reveal herself. "Hi, Giles."

"Hi, Buffy." He smiled. "How are you? Already feeling at home here?"

"Yeah.", she nodded. "It's been easy, you know, Angel's been showing me everything." She shot Angel a pointed look and a wicked grin.

"Giles just stopped by...", he started, feeling incredibly stupid. Was she trying to give him a heart attack?

"Yeah, you wanna hang with us?", Giles asked, completely unaware of the sexual tension in the room.

"I´d love to, really. But suddenly I feel very tired. Guess I'm gonna go to bed.", she faked a yawn.

"Oh, good night then...", Giles smiled.

"Thanks. You guys have fun!", she started for the stairs while Giles went towards the living room.

"Oh, Angel?"

He stopped dead in his tracks. Giles was sitting on the sofa and so he went to look after Buffy. He found her at the bottom of the stairs again and quickly moved towards her. She gave him a quick but carnal kiss, making him wish he'd never opened the door earlier.

"Good night.", she whispered and turned around, giving her hips an extra sway as she climbed up the stairs.

Angel groaned and turned away from her. Talking to Giles was fun but considering his options, it was really a poor substitute. Handing his friend a beer, Angel sank down on the couch.

"So, you guys are good again?", Giles started the conversation.

Angel took a look at his watch and yawned as he headed for his room. Despite his grouchiness about Giles unexpected visit he couldn't be mad as his friend. So they had talked and finally ended up watching a little TV until Giles decided to take off for home. Stopping in front of his door, Angel listened, hoping to find a sign that his love was still awake but finding none. With a sigh he entered his own room and undressed down to his boxers before he entered the bathroom.

Just as he was rinsing his mouth, he was startled by a high cry. Bumping his head, he cursed before he ran out of the bathroom. Buffy was crying, clearly terrified and he burst into her room without giving it a second thought.

Looking around he searched for an intruder or another reason she was in terror but found none. Buffy was thrashing on the bed, the sheets pooled at her feet, her shirt ridden up from her wild moves.

"No...no, please don't...", she cried, in the middle of a nightmare. Angel ran towards the bed, trying to touch her.

"Buffy? Please, Buffy, wake up!", he called without success. "You're having a nightmare, love, wake up!"

When she still wasn't responding, he shook her not too gently. Though he was afraid of hurting her, he knew she needed to wake up.

"No!", she screamed again and sat up in bed with a gasp. Angel leaned back, giving her the time to realize what was going on. Tears were running down her cheeks and finally she noticed she was awake and that Angel was staring at her, worried.

"Shh, love...it's ok.", he gently wiped her tears away. "It was all just a dream..."

She stared back at him and then suddenly flew into his arms that embraced her willingly. He rocked her gently for a while, murmuring sweet nonsense in her ear to sooth her. Finally her sobs ebbed away and she pulled away from his shoulder.

"Hey", he whispered, smiling at her. "What happened?"

Buffy tried to remember her dream but shook her head.

"Dunno.", she mumbled, suddenly feeling stupid.

"Must have been a real horror.", he gently caressed her hand with his thumb. "I heard you scream and I...god I was so scared. I thought something happened to you...", he confessed.

"It was just...a nightmare.", she wasn't sure if she was saying this for him or herself. "Sorry..."

"Hey, I was just going to bed.", he assured her. "No problem...".

"Oh, then...", she looked from him towards the door. He searched her face, looking through her facade, saw all the fear still lingering there.

"Would you...stay with me, please?", she finally asked shyly.

He gave her a warm smile and kissed her on the crown. "Of course."

Buffy watched him switch off the lights and close the door to her room, sighing with relief as he joined her in bed. He slid under the covers, cradling her close, spooning protectively around her tiny frame.

Feeling her relax against him, Angel kissed her bare shoulder and pulled her close.

"Sleep, baby."

Soon, they were both deeply asleep, dreaming peacefully.

Buffy had never slept this good before and that realization was only topped by the way Angel woke her up with soft, butterfly kisses that started on her face and soon ventured to more intimate places. He didn't pause his caresses until she came for the first time, her sleepy face flushed with pleasure.

"Morning, baby.", she smiled at him when he was lying beside her again.

"Good morning, my love.", he kissed her gently.

"Mmh...I could get used to this.", she purred when they finally broke apart.

He was just about to ask her if she'd slept well when she suddenly pushed him into the covers and worked down his boxers. His already hard cock jumped when she first touched him, setting a slow but incredibly erotic rhythm. Angel moaned, marveling at her perfect feel for him and pulled her shirt over her head to take advantage of her breasts. Now it was her turn to moan and after a while they both needed more.

Angel pulled at her hips, tossing one leg over his, so that she straddled him. Unsure of this new position, Buffy waited for him to guide her. Gently, he lifted her, so that she was hovering just above his now painfully aroused cock. He took one of her hands in is own and together they guided him just barely inside her tight channel before she slowly sank down on him. New sensations washed over them, Buffy gasped as she felt him fill her so impossibly deep. Not leaving her eyes for a second, Angel finally grabbed her hips and started a slow rhythm that Buffy soon picked up. When she started to rise and lower herself more naturally and faster, Angel's hands once more moved towards her breasts. Pinching her nipples while she rode him was almost enough to push him over the edge. Ecstasy she never thought was possible filled her and Buffy slammed down on him, harder, trying to take him even deeper.

Angel knew he wouldn't last much longer and when his hand found the tight, swollen nub between her thighs she screamed his name, taking him with her.

"Oh God, Angel....I love you...", she panted, splayed on top of him

"I love you, baby.", he replied, kissing her with all the feelings he had for her.

Their growling stomachs were probably the only reason that caused them to leave the bed at all. But as soon as they were in the kitchen they attacked each other again. Glad that she only wore one of his shirts when she jumped up and wrapped her legs around him, he easily ripped her panties and sheathed himself inside of her. He knew she was almost a virgin but she sure as hell didn't act like one when she told him to move faster, harder while she was pressed against the kitchen counter for support. Their climaxes came quickly and sated for the moment they enjoyed breakfast together.

Buffy was still partly shocked that they actually just had sex in the kitchen and giggled.

"I think I´ll never be able to walk in here without blushing.", she told him when he cocked his eyebrow questioningly.

"Probably not.", he agreed. "But I just don't know how to keep my hands off of you."

"As long as we're alone you won't have to.", she winked at him.

Both knew this was probably more true than they wanted to admit. Right now, everything was perfect. But hard times would surely come.

"Hey, Twinkie.", Faith hugged her best friend.

"Hey.", Buffy pulled her close.

"So, any ideas what to get her?"

Buffy shook her head no. Finding something for Dawn was probably not the easiest thing, even if she had really thought about it rather than having sex with Angel. Soon they were happily checking out the shops for a goodbye-present.

"You okay?", Faith asked, looking at Buffy with concern written all over her face.

"Yeah, sure.", Buffy smiled, trying not to shift from the slight soreness between her legs. "Why did you..."

"Dunno.", Faith frowned. "You seem to be different...like there's something bothering you."

"Sweetie, I'm telling you, it's nothing.", Buffy hoped she sounded convincing. She felt like shit, having to lie to her best friend. But she couldn't tell her everything either, right? You didn't just tell people about the sex you had with your brother, in the kitchen on top of all places. Not even if they were staring holes into you with their big, brown eyes.

"Mmh, okay...just thought...never mind.", Faith smiled. There was definitely something. She just couldn't put her finger onto it.

After hours of shopping they sat down for a cup of coffee.

"So, have you heard anything from your Mom and Dad yet?", Faith asked.

"Uhm, they called when we were at Gunn´s, planning the party. Angel talked to them. They're having a good time, according to Mom."

"Oh, good. So...you and Angel are five by five?" "Yeah, sure. Why do you always ask me that?", Buffy shot right back.

"I dunno, maybe I'm worried, just because of the history the two of you have...I´d think it's difficult getting along, no? I mean...before the wedding you weren't exactly happy." "I know.", Buffy remembered the nights she cried perfectly. "But...living with him is good. I mean, I know we have a history and all but still...we like spending time together, we just have a lot in common...". She felt like the biggest liar on the planet right now.

"Probably true.", Faith had to admit. After all, there had been this chemistry between them from the beginning.

"And sometimes he's just so sweet...", Buffy murmured, then becoming aware of just saying that out loud.

"Like when?", Faith instantly probed.

"Like...when he makes the best pancakes I've ever had or like when he woke me up from that nightmare last night...". Or like when he's doing that thing with his tongue.

"You had a nightmare?"

"Yeah...must have been pretty tough. Angel said I was screaming and all." But the sex in the morning pretty much made up for it, you know?

"But you don't..."

"Nope, don't remember.", Buffy shook her head.

Finally having the perfect gift for Dawn, the girls were lying on Faith's bed, enjoying a huge bowl of ice-cream each. Now it was Faith's turn to talk, things with Groo seemed to be kinda stuck. Talking endlessly, both forgot the time and when Buffy looked outside, it was already dark.

"Oh shit...it's already dark! I should really go...". Angel was probably waiting for her!

"Why don't you just stay?", Faith suggested.

Buffy looked at her, wrestling with the decision. "Oh, come on, B.", Faith pleaded.

She just couldn't deny her, not after everything Faith did for her. She knew Angel was probably sitting at the living room again, waiting for her, a fact that made her heart jump. But how explain this to Faith?

"Okay...", she sighed in defeat. "But I should call..."

"Yeah, sure. I´ll just check if dinner's ready, you call Angel.", Faith hopped up and out of the room while Buffy was already dialing the number.

Angel picked up after the third ring, his voice so smooth and sexy, Buffy wanted to run home and into his arms immediately. But instead of that she quickly explained things to him. He sounded disappointed, but understood her dilemma.

"I´ll miss you.", he whispered.

"I miss you already. See you tomorrow?", Buffy cradled the receiver closer as if she could feel him.

"I'm here.", he replied. "Have fun."

"You, too.", she whispered.

"Love you...", his voice was so full of longing.

"Love you, too.", she quickly kissed the phone and hung up when she heard Faith return.

"Everything okay?"

"Yup.", Buffy nodded, trying to push away the nagging longing inside of her. How could it be so hard to be separated from him for one night?

Faith ignored Buffy´s flushed face, pulling her best friend up from the bed.

"Come on. Dinner's ready."

When Buffy came home the next day, the house was quiet as usual. She closed the front door with a loud bang and added a loud: "Hello?!". Then she listened carefully for an answer, hoping that Angel was home and alone. She'd missed him terribly for the last afternoon and night and was anxious to see him. Mere seconds after her entry she heard footsteps upstairs and then Angel appeared.

"Hey.", she smiled.

He rushed down the stairs, swept her into his arms and kissed her like he'd missed her for weeks and with all the passion and longing that had filled his night without her. Buffy went into his arms willingly, molding into him, opening her mouth to his questing tongue, marveling once again at the perfect feel of him. When they finally broke apart, Buffy found herself backed against the front door, Angel hovering over her. He cupped her face in both hands, drowning in her hazel eyes and the love he saw there.

"Hey.", he finally whispered before he kissed her again, this time more sweetly, savoring every moment.

She looked up at him, playing with the hem of his shirt.

"So...watcha doing?"

"Uhm, I was just heading for the pool. It's so warm outside and I didn't know when you'd be back...", he tucked a stray of hair behind her ear. "Wanna join me?"

"Just gimme a sec and I´ll be back downstairs."

He kissed her again before she ran upstairs and then decided to wait for her in the garden.

Angel was already inside the pool, enjoying the coolness of the water surrounding him. When Buffy came out of the house, quickly tossing her sundress aside he was glad that he was at least partially hidden from her gaze, cause the second he saw her in her bikini he was rock hard. As if she had somehow sensed it, Buffy turned around, flashing him a radiant smile. God, he looked simply forbidden, all bare- chested and wet.

"How's the water?", she called, pulling out of her stupor.

"Wonderful. You have to come inside.", he replied. Wow, two complete sentences. Great job, Angel!

She carefully dipped a toe into the water and shuddered.

"Wow. Cold." "Come inside..", he repeated, this time more pleadingly.

"Okay...okay.", she gathered all her courage and then jumped.

"Jeeeeesus.", she shrieked when she came up, wiping her hair out of her face. When she opened her eyes, her gaze met dark brown ones. Angel, who was able to stand in the narrow area of the pool, pulled her towards him. Her struggle was short and when he started nibbling at her lower lip, she soon kissed him back. Clinging to him, her arms wound around his neck, she licked little droplets of water from his face while he still pulled her closer.

"God, I missed you.", he murmured, admitting his weakness, nibbling at her earlobe.

"I can tell.", she grinned, pressing against his obvious arousal, not without feeling proud of being able to affect him seemingly without effort. Suddenly she felt rather hot instead of shivering from the cold water. Their tongues fought a lover's battle and without realizing it, Buffy soon felt the wall of the pool against her back. Her legs were wound around his waist so that he pushed insistently against her intimate

places.

"Way...too much...clothing.", he mumbled between kisses and tugged at her bikini top. "Angel!", she was scandalized.

"So...beautiful.", he grinned with satisfaction when her breasts bounced free, floating in the water, her full mounds and erect nipples calling for his touch. Buffy moaned and instantly arched towards him, barely aware of the wet thud her top made when it met the tiles.

"Ohgod, Angel...", she gripped his shoulders for support. How could this feel so wrong and so right at the same time? A part of her was shocked at her own wanton behavior, in the family pool on top of all places but the bigger part of her didn't care as long as he didn't stop touching her.

"Angel, stop.", she nudged his chin up to look at his face.

"What is it, baby?", he asked, puzzled. "Don't you...?"

She stopped him by placing a finger on his lips.

"Shh...", she whispered. " I need you. Inside of me. Now. I just...".

As soon as she uttered the words she blushed furiously and Angel knew he just fell in love with her a little more. He kissed her passionately, hoisting her up a little before he pulled down his shorts.

Buffy watched him remove the last barrier between them, wondering what was coming next. Then he pulled her panties aside and slipped one finger inside of her. She mewled with pleasure, drawing his tongue deep inside her mouth.

"God, Buffy. I love you.", he panted, positioning himself at her entrance. "Love you, too. My Angel.", she whispered. When he finally pushed inside, she gasped at the new sensation. He felt so cold, a fact that was not at all unpleasant. As soon as they both had adjusted to the water surrounding them, creating a whole different situation from everything they knew so far, they set a passionate rhythm. Both felt like they had been separated for too long, so neither of them cared much about gentleness. Angel nearly lost it when she bit his neck, hard. He pushed even deeper inside of her, pulling her legs up to spread her even wider for him.

When he felt her climax approach, he kissed her again. Thrusting once more inside her fluttering channel, he moaned into her mouth, holding onto her for dear life.

Resting their foreheads against each other in their aftermath, both started to laugh with pure happiness.

"I never did it in a pool before", he finally admitted.

She grinned, feeling a little proud and needing to realize what had just happened.

"You're amazing, baby.", he nuzzled her nose.

"No, you are.", she kissed him tenderly.

Feeling the cold slowly getting to them, they soon left the pool, cuddling together on one of the deck chairs, dreaming the day away, talking to each other with both words and kisses.

Angel lay on the bed, watching Buffy pace the room. She had been nervous all day and even if he understood the reason of it, he couldn't stand to see her like this.

"C´mere.", he gently reached for her. She stopped in her tracks, looking at him as he padded the empty spot beside him. Sighing, she approached the bed.

"I'm sorry."

"I know you're nervous. Me, too, believe me.", he placed her hand over his heart so that she could feel it's beat. "But you have to relax."

Buffy shot him a dubious look but didn't protest as he pulled her into his embrace.

"Shh...relax...", he started to stroke her back. "Everything's gonna be fine." This better sounded comforting.

"You don't know that.", she refused to let go. They both knew this evening was going to be their biggest test, yet. Tonight, all their friends were coming over for Dawn's goodbye-party.

"You're right. We'll never know. We have to be careful.", he murmured, drawing circles on her back.

"What if we fail? What if they find out...ohgod, Angel, what...".

He cut her off with a kiss. Finally she started to relax.

"We're gonna be okay. Baby, we've been through this...", he started again.

"Right. No touching, no dancing. No nicknames.", she repeated once again. "Oh. And Faith's spending the night."

Angel nodded. Normal. They had to look like normal siblings, especially because everybody knew of their history. Though sleeping separately would probably be the hardest part. For the last nights they had slumbered peacefully in each other's arms after making love again and again. So. Try normal.

The party turned out the be a blast. Everybody was there, having a good time. Dawn actually cried when Gunn took the blindfold from her eyes, unable to believe that her friends had done all this for her. But soon she had recovered, determined to dance with every guy at the party. Not even Giles could deny her.

Buffy and Angel were trying their best to hold up, though it was difficult. Both were so determined to seem normal that they barely talked to each other. All Angel could do was watching her from a distance, looking incredibly sexy, laughing with her friends and glowing with happiness.

Doyle, who had volunteered as the DJ for the night finally played "All the things she said" and, at Dawn's request after various cheers, Buffy and Faith found themselves in the middle of the dancefloor. Buffy felt Angel's eyes on her when Faith grabbed her hip and ran a hand through her hair. Blocking out every thought about her lover, Buffy concentrated on Faith's brown eyes, losing herself in the moment. They ended the dance with a quick kiss on the lips and collapsed on the couch, laughing.

"Still not losing their touch, huh?", Gunn nudged Angel in the rips.

He faked a laugh and then quickly excused himself.

Buffy saw him disappear towards the kitchen and got up, mumbling something about helping Angel with the drinks. She found him, leaning against the counter and gently approached him, placing a hand on his arm.

"Hey.", she whispered tenderly.

He turned around, cupping her face in his hands and let out a loud sigh. "You okay?"

"I never thought this would be so hard.", he mumbled.

She leaned into the caress, closing her eyes. Seeing all the couples at the party was making it even harder to pretend. It hurt almost physically not being able to touch the way they wanted to. But this was the prize they had to pay, right?

Slowly they leaned closer, their lips met in a bittersweet kiss, trying to make up for everything they couldn't have. They broke apart, breathing heavily, drinking each other in with their eyes.

Footsteps in the hallway. Buffy looked at him, hoping he could read her feelings for him in her eyes.

Faith cleared her throat soundly.

"Uhm, am I interrupting something?"

Buffy turned around, plastering a smile on her face. "No, of course not."

"´kay.", the brunette replied, hesitantly. She knew Buffy was lying. But she could wait.

A minute later they were back in the living room, mingling with the other guests again.

The two guest rooms went unoccupied that night since everybody caught a ride home. So Faith, Buffy and Angel were the only ones left. Cleaning up the living room, they left the kitchen for tomorrow. Yawning they went upstairs, eager to hit the mattress. When they reached the end of the hallway it was time to part. Angel turned to the left while Faith opened the door to the right. "Good night.", Buffy said softly, making a move with her hand as if she was reaching out for him.

"Good night.", Angel whispered, his eyes full of longing.

"I love you.", he mouthed, catching a last look of her face before closing the door.

Buffy closed her own door, facing her best friend, trying to fight the sadness within her.

"Please don't get me wrong, Twinkie...", Faith started. "But...you and Angel..."

Buffy´s head shot up. "What?"

"I dunno.", Faith shrugged. "But are you sure he's over you?"

Buffy tried not to faint. Ok. Think, Summers.

"Faith!", she finally shouted, both accusingly and mocking her friend.

"Sorry.", the brunette replied. There was something going on. She just couldn't put her finger onto it. Maybe she was just seeing things...

While Faith was soon soundly asleep, Buffy and Angel lay awake, finding it hard to sleep without a pair of loving arms around them. But eventually even the both of them dozed off.

The last week of their alone time together passed all too soon and even if nobody was disturbing them, Buffy and Angel both dreaded the day their happiness would come to an end. They spent most of their days together, falling asleep together, making love as often as possible, trying to deny. Soon it was their last evening alone together. After making her dinner, Angel lead her to the big couch, where they were happily snuggling together, watching movies. Finally, he carried her upstairs, placed her on the bed, only allowing her to open her eyes when he'd lit like a thousand candles all over his room. They made love with special tenderness this night, trying to savor each moment. When she was finally spooned in his embrace, Buffy sighed sleepily.

"I wish this could last forever."

He pulled her closer, his nose nuzzling the crook of her neck, and together they dozed off.

"So...this is it.", Buffy stated, looking at him from across the kitchen as she watched Holland's car pull into the driveway. Honeymoon's over.

"That's it.", he murmured, crossing the distance between them. She turned round to face him.

Their eyes locked, their lips met in a bittersweet kiss, trying to forget the upcoming doom, trying to forget reality even for a moment. They held onto each other, kissing as if their lives depended on it.

"Hello! We're home!", Darla´s voice echoed from the hallway.

Slowly, ever so slowly, they broke apart.

"I love you. Never forget that.", Angel whispered.

"I love you.", Buffy echoed.

One last kiss and then they entered the hallway.

"Hi!"

Feedback: Love it, eat it, drink it....so, please? :o)

Dedication: to my twinly, cause she listens to my crazy ideas *g*...and I didn't make Tim blush for a while, maybe that'll help ;o) Marauders rule!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Part 16 - No place like home

The taste of Angel's kiss, coffee with breathmints, still in her mouth, Buffy didn't hesitate when her mother pulled her into a hug and held her on at arms length a few seconds later. A short look to the side told her that Holland and Angel were shaking hands and patting shoulders, too. Darla´s voice pulled her back into reality.

"Buffy." She smiled at her daughter.

"Hi, Mom.", Buffy smiled back. "You look good."

She really did. The tan made her look younger and her blonde hair seemed even lighter from the sun. Her mother looked... happy. Happy and relaxed.

"Thanks, sweetheart. You, too. Have you done something to your hair?"

Buffy shook her head no, wondering what to say.

"You look different...". Buffy tensed when her mother eyed her closely but relaxed again when Darla finally shrugged, giving up.

"Buffy." Holland advanced his daughter to hug her, too. He barely knew her but he knew he'd missed her nevertheless.

Angel leaned down to hug Darla.

A few seconds of awkward silence settled down after their initial pleasantries. Angel tried to ease the tension by asking about their trip home. Good, neutral ground.

"You have to be tired...", he suggested.

"Oh, not really.", Darla chirped. "Actually, we were planning on having a family-dinner later."

"But what about Lilah?", Buffy asked, not sure if she could stand the situation otherwise.

"I called her from the airport, she'll be arriving within the next hour.", said Holland.

Buffy and Angel shared a short glance, both glad not to be alone with their parents.

"Angel, why don't you help Holland with the suitcases, while Buffy and I pick out dinner.", Darla suggested and already pulled Buffy with her towards the kitchen, mumbling something about girltalk.

Angel saw Buffy´s rather shocked expression but was unable to help her. So he turned around to face his father again.

"Woman!", Holland smiled, looking after them. Angel nodded.

"You and Buffy are on better terms I assume?"

"What?", Angel asked, puzzled.

"Sorry for being so blunt. Darla´s rather worried the two of you don't like each other."

"Oh.", Angel tried to smile. "We're definitely better. In fact we have a lot in common, I guess. We get along fine."

"That's what I've been telling Darla. But you know how woman can be sometimes...".

Angel laughed and nodded at the right moments for the following hour. He knew he probably had the easier task. His thoughts kept wandering back to Darla and Buffy in the kitchen, hoping his love was alright.

Buffy knew Darla. She was used to her chattering about the vacation, the hotel, the weather and all the places they'd seen, so she smiled and said "ah" and "oh" at the right intervals. But as soon as she has started to relax a little, Darla once again took her by surprise.

"So...you and Angel.", her mother half stated, half asked.

"Huh?"

"How are you getting along? Come on, you know we're all worried."

"Oh." Great, Buffy. Think. "We're good. I mean, we really like each other, I guess." Like. Yeah. Sure.

"At last!", Darla smiled. "You know, I really want this to be perfect."

"This?"

"This new life, a family, married-life, children...", Darla explained. "I want to make it right this time. It'd be horrible if you wouldn't get along."

Buffy plastered her best smile on her face.

"I think you've nothing to worry about then."

"Oh, Buffy! I'm so proud of you.", Darla hugged her tightly and Buffy wanted to run. Could this whole situation get more horrible by any chance?

Again the front door closed with a bang.

"Hello! Anybody home?", sounded Lilah´s cheerful voice from the hallway. Buffy was sure she sighed with relief when she heard her. Quickly, she hopped off the barstool and followed Darla.

Holland and Angel were coming down the stairs while Buffy hugged her sister and when she stepped back, Angel's hand brushed the small of her back, almost like by chance, sending a shiver down her back. His eyes asked her if she was okay and she nodded, even if she didn't know when she'd ever been more far from okay. His halfsmile was bittersweet and she knew that he'd understood. But then the moment was over and he turned around to embrace Lilah.

Dinner was to be delivered in an hour and Buffy went up to her room to call Faith. Just as she'd picked up the phone, a knock on the door made her jump and a mixture of fear and anticipation flooded her.

"Yeah?"

It was Lilah. "Can I come in?"

"Sure", Buffy nodded.

"The others are still downstairs.", Lilah told her. "I thought we could talk a little."

Buffy smiled. "How was L.A.?"

"Busy.", Lilah sighed. "Look, I'm really sorry for not coming home on the weekends...but there was so much to do and I have friends there...".

"You don't need to apologize. We're all grown up, right? And I know you're working hard."

Soon they were deep into a conversation about the best shops in L.A., agreeing they needed to go shopping there, together, soon.

"So...", Lilah finally started hesitantly.

"So?", Buffy encouraged her to go on.

"So it was okay for you, here, alone with Angel? Did he..."

"Did he behave himself?", Buffy grinned as if the question was really funny.

"I assure you, he was the perfect gentleman. Really, he was...uhm...showing me everything. We spent a lot of time together." Wow. That wasn't even a lie. "Oh, good. He can be a little...grouchy sometimes.", Lilah sighed. "But I know he couldn't resist your charms."

Buffy blushed and was saved by the phone ringing. Even as she assured Lilah she'd just let it ring, her sister excused herself. Buffy picked up and was glad to hear Faith's voice on the other end, wondering if Darla was back already.

Lilah closed the door and went across the hall to talk to her brother. As much as she wanted to believe Buffy´s version, she wanted proof.

He didn't seem to be surprised at her question.

"We got along pretty good.", he answered. "I think it's impossible to not like her."

Lilah nodded.

"So, you took care of her?", she just wanted to be sure.

"She's not a child who needs a babysitter, Li!", he smiled. No. Certainly not a child.

"I know. But...I dunno...she has something hat makes me want to protect her, you know?", Lilah smiled, a little uneasy.

"I know what you mean." Believe me, I know.

Dinner was served in the large dining room, the family gathered around the big table. Holland sat at the head of the table, Lilah and Darla flanking him, so that Angel, who appeared last, was sitting across from Buffy. After they ate their Lasagna in silence, the dessert was served to Darla´s and Holland's stories from their honeymoon. Nobody else said much and Angel was glad about that. The new situation was difficult. Buffy was so close and yet so far away. They looked at each other from time to time but nothing else. His fingers ached to touch her, his lips longing to devour her sweet ones, all of his being cried out for her and he was so deep in thoughts that he practically jumped when Darla addressed him.

"And here's your present, Angel."

Everybody looked at him and laughed when he blushed softly.

"Hey, no fantasizing at the dinner table!", Lilah teased him and he blushed even more, avoiding Buffy´s gaze.

Lilah unfolded the paper first, revealing a pair of beautiful high heels.

"Oh, thank you!", she beamed, walking around in them.

Angel followed, revealing a new shirt that he held in front of him. Finally Buffy was left to unwrap her gift, producing a beautiful, softly pink sundress with floral print on it.

"Thank you.", she smiled.

"Go ahead, try it on!", Darla encouraged her. When Lilah joined her bid, Buffy finally surrendered and went to the downstairs bathroom.

Angel sucked in a sharp breath when the door opened again. The dress was perfect. It hugged her curves ever so softly, the neckline dipping extremely low. Her eyes found his for a second but drifted away when everybody else commented on her looks. After silence settled in, Angel realized that he was supposed to say something.

"Beautiful.", he smiled, leaving it open to decide if he meant the dress or the person wearing it. When Buffy returned in her normal clothes, Holland had started mixing drinks, signalizing that the evening was far from over.

By the time they all went upstairs to go to bed, Buffy´s need to talk to Angel or a least lean onto him for a second had become almost overwhelming. All the family harmony was just so unreal after the last three weeks. She caught Angel's eye, knowing he didn't do much better. Constantly surrounded by the others, they both knew there wasn't going to be a kiss goodnight. Not to speak of falling asleep together. So they went to their end of the hallway, Lilah joining them to use the bathroom first, and parted ways without a word. One last look, a soft "goodnight" and they were both left in their own rooms.

Angel sighed heavily, suddenly feeling very alone. For the last few nights they had been sleeping either in her bed or his, making love, falling asleep peacefully. It seemed so far away as if it had never even happened. He stripped down to his boxers and without bothering to wash or brush his teeth, slid under the covers. Tossing and turning around he was unable to sleep, feeling dead tired but unable to find peace.

Buffy returned from the bathroom and tossed her clothes onto a chair. Her bed seemed horribly large and empty all of a sudden. Sighing she lay down, trying to catch the scent of him on the pillows. Hugging herself tightly, she tried to pretend he was holding her, but it felt wrong. It wasn't until the first birds started to sing that she fell into a light slumber.

Buffy yawned as she entered the kitchen. After barely three hours of sleep she'd need a lot of caffeine to be able to communicate at all today. Waking up without feeling him at her side almost made her want to cry. What she wasn't prepared for was her mother bristling around in the kitchen. Pouring coffee into a mug she mumbled "Morning" and slid onto a stool.

"Good morning!", Darla sing-songed, completely oblivious to her daughter's need for quiet. Buffy was halfway through her coffee when Darla chirped:

"Angel! Good morning!"

Buffy tensed and hesitantly looked at him. He looked like hell. Usually the one of them to be ready to start the day, he almost fell asleep pouring coffee into his mug.

"Morning.", he muttered. His eyes came to rest on Buffy and he knew he wasn't the only one that hadn't slept last night.

"Oh my.", Darla went on. "Buffy, it seems like you finally found someone!"

"Huh?", Buffy almost choked on her coffee.

"Someone who's just as grouchy as you in the morning!"

Angel and Buffy relaxed again, both concentrating hard on the table in front of them.

"I know just the thing to get you started, sweetheart."

Buffy made a sound that would have made Angel laugh if it had been in another time and place.

"Shopping!", Darla exclaimed as if she'd just found a new cure for cancer. Angel expected her to shout "tada!" any second.

"Mom...", Buffy started to complain.

"No. Buffy Anne summers, you will join me on my shopping tour. I need your advise."

"You know how to dress."

Angel couldn't help but grin at that.

"This is different. You're father and I have decided that I´ll need to work less in the future. So I have more free time."

Buffy and Angel glanced at each other in shock. They had counted on Darla having to work as usual.

"And so I applied for another job at our firm.", Darla continued. "And I want to make a good impression. So, shopping."

Buffy shrugged, suddenly feeling very numb inside. Darla took that as a yes and shooed Buffy up to her room to get ready. Turning around to smile at Angel she chirped: "Has she always been like this for the last three weeks?"

"Mmh...not that bad.", he mumbled. Usually it gets better after one or two orgasms, you know? Shaking his head he too another cup with him to go out into the garden. Maybe the fresh air would help him wake up.

When Buffy returned from their shopping trip late afternoon she thought she was going to drop dead. Spending the day with Darla, who'd been talking almost nonstop, a serious lack of sleep plus the fact that she didn't have so much as a private word with Angel for the last 24 hours were making her dangerously bad-tempered and exhausted. She let Darla talk her into various pieces of clothing, desperate to get home but without success. Only the fact that there was going to be another family dinner tonight finally drove Darla home, so that she was now downstairs, preparing everything.

Dropping her bags, she looked at herself in the mirror. A knock at the door interrupted her hearty yawn. ´I´m not going to help her cook, now`, she thought.

"Yeah?", she called, preparing for a confrontation with her mother. However the head poking through the door wasn't Darla´s.

"Hey.", Angel whispered.

"Hey.", she smiled tiredly, but glad to see him.

"Where's your Mom?"

"Downstairs, cooking.", she rolled her eyes. As soon as she'd finished, he stepped inside, closing the door behind him.

"Good.", he mumbled. "Cause I've been dying to do this all day."

"Do wh...", she was cut off in midsentence when he pulled her into his arms and kissed her tenderly. All her resistance melted away as she leaned closer, allowing his tongue access to her warm mouth. They stood there, kissing and kissing, drinking each other in until the need for oxygen became a serious issue. Panting, she pushed him backwards until the back of his knees hit the arm chair. He sat down, pulling her with him until she was straddling him.

"Oh god, Buffy.", he sighed before his lips met hers again.

Neither of them noticed how much time passed, too busy with kissing, nibbling, sucking as if trying to make up for the past hours. Their hands roamed over their bodies but they didn't dare to give in to their need. For now, kisses had to be enough, even if their lower bodies were desperately seeking more than the friction their position could provide.

"I missed you.", he whispered when she snuggled against him.

"Me, too.", she replied. "I never thought this would be so hard." And it had been only a day!

He nodded and pulled her closer. "I love you."

"I love you, too.", she sniffled softly.

They cuddled together until it was time for dinner. Just moving to kiss one last time they heard Lilah´s voice.

"Buffy, Angel, dinner's ready!", just on the other side of the door. Gathering strength for another round of "we're a happy family", they went downstairs.

Hours later, Buffy once again snuggled into the covers. Still, she didn't get a kiss goodnight but dinner had been better. This time she'd been sitting between Holland and Angel whose hand occasionally had brushed hers under the table, helping her relax. Holland had talked almost exclusively to her today, trying to get to know her better. He even wanted her to meet him for lunch the next day. Trying to remember Angel's kisses from earlier, Buffy sighed. Time for another night of restless sleep.

When Buffy turned up at the firm the next day, she was nervous. It was the first time she was going to meet her father alone. As he had instructed her, she went to the gate keeper to be led to her father's office. There the secretary already awaited her and Holland immediately introduced her as his daughter.

On their way to the restaurant, Buffy got the impression that her father was a powerful, yet well-liked man. And he made no attempt of hiding her, on the contrary it seemed like he wanted the world to know that she was family now.

They talked easily all the way through dinner, Holland showing interest in whatever she seemed willing to tell him about her classes, her friends and her hobbies, but never pushing.

"Buffy, I wanted to ask you or rather tell you something.", he finally started.

She looked at him curiously.

"I know we don't know each other even half as good as I want to know you, but I wanted to tell you that, even if you might not feel like it, you're as dear to me as Lilah or Angel. Whether you call me "Dad" or "Holland", it doesn't matter. You're my daughter. I want you to know that there's nothing you can't tell me. I love you, okay?"

"Okay.", she sniffled. She'd never had a father. And this one seemed to be perfect in every sense. No wonder Darla had fallen in love with him.

The family settled into a routine during the next week, some not even noticing it, some content and some very frustrated as the time ticked by. Holland and Lilah usually left early, returning for dinner or a little earlier. Darla spent the week still at home, organizing her new household.

Buffy and Angel on the other hand were on the edge. They had been barely sleeping all week and even if both of them went out with their different friends, something important was missing. Besides there was the fact that they were practically never alone in the house. Every time they were able to steal away for a few minutes they were interrupted sooner or later. All they could share were kisses, some of them longer but most of them nothing to soothe their need for each other. It was like cold turkey, not being able to touch or behave like they wanted to, thousand times worse thanks to the fact they were sleeping separated only by two wooden doors. Every time they were alone in one of their rooms, Darla had a question or they thought they'd heard her steps in the hallway. When they were trying to watch a movie together in the living room, Lilah or Holland joined them. Their liberty to make love all day, if they wanted to, from the past weeks had been exchanged with celibacy.

"God, Buffy.", Angel moaned once again, panting from the kiss they'd just shared in the kitchen when they'd offered to get the ice-cream.

"I know.", she whispered. "I want you, too."

His groin jumped from the mere notion of it.

"We have to find a way...", he mumbled, nuzzling her earlobe. "I'm starving for you."

"I love you, my Angel.", she whispered and kissed him softly before they headed for the living room again.

The next morning, Buffy found a note in front of her door.

"We're going out. Tonight." A heart framed the words and she smiled as she opened the door to go downstairs. Angel was already sipping on his coffee and Buffy smiled at him radiantly before she said: "Morning, Mom."

Darla turned around. "Good morning, Buffy. So, you have any plans for today?"

"Uhm, I'm meeting Ben for lunch today."

Darla flinched slightly as she heard the name of her once-almost-son.

"Oh. Nothing else you two are planning on a Friday night?"

"We're going to a party tonight, nothing special.", Buffy announced, silently marveling at her growing ability to lie.

"Oh, I see. I'm sure you'll have fun.", Darla smiled.

"It's probably getting late, but there are lots of places to sleep at Anya´s.", Angel added. Buffy shot him an incredulous look. He nodded barely noticeable.

"Right. Remind me to bring my sleeping bag.", Buffy jumped in immediately.

"I will.", he smiled.

At seven, Buffy was standing in the hallway, a small bag thrown over her shoulder.

"I'm ready!", she called.

Angel appeared from the living room, as usually with Darla in tow.

"Sleeping bags?", Darla reminded them, eager to help.

"Already in the car.", Angel assured her.

"Okay, have fun!", the blonde called as Buffy and Angel walked out of the front door.

"Bye, Mom!", Buffy waved, following Angel to his car.

"Bye!", he echoed and took her bag.

As soon as the car was out of sight from the house, Angel stopped the car and leaned over to kiss her softly.

"Where are we going?", Buffy asked, once they were driving again. "I know that Anya and Gunn are both in L.A., visiting Dawn."

"You'll see.", he replied cryptically.

She glared at him before she started to smile, content to go wherever he was going, putting a hand on his knee.

Soon they arrived at a small hotel that looked rather comfy. Checking their reservation, they were soon let to their room.

"Wow...this is beautiful.", Buffy looked around. The room was held in pastel tones and dominated by the sight of a king-sized bed.

"Just like you.", Angel whispered in her ear, pulling her back against his chest.

"I can't believe it."

"What?", he started nuzzling her neck, making her mold into him.

"Everything. Us, getting away, the whole past week, this hotel...".

"Mmh...", he murmured, pulling her closer, kissing a wet trail up her neck to her face. She turned around and looked at him.

With one look into his chocolate eyes everything around them disappeared. Gone was the tension, gone their lack of sleep, gone all their frustration and all that was left was pure love. When his lips descended on hers, she sighed into his mouth, pulling him yet a little closer.

"I missed you.", she whispered.

"All this time you were right in front of me but I couldn't touch you.", he mumbled. "Not the way I wanted to."

"How?", she asked, playfully.

He tucked a stray of hair behind her ear.

"I wanted to kiss you.", he started to underline each statement with the action he described. "I wanted to hold you, to feel your arms around me. I longed to pull you closer, until you were able to feel how much I wanted you."

She squealed.

"I imagined taking your sweater off, so that I could see your nipples standing out through the shirt, begging me to touch them. But I wouldn't, not until I had taken your shirt off."

He sucked in a sharp breath as he saw her satin clad breasts, almost spilling out of the thin fabric with every heaving breath she took.

"I knew that as soon as I was touching your bare skin you'd start taking my shirt off, just like you do now. That you'd press against me as soon as I´d found the clasp of your bra, that I´d kiss you and then start to cup your breasts, because I love your breasts. They're so full and soft, I love the sound you make when I brush across your nipples the first time."

Buffy gave a shuddering moan.

"Just like now you'd start opening my belt, desperate to get it off as I work on your jeans." He pulled the fabric down her legs, staring at the very sexy, very small g-string covering her most intimate places.

"Jesus, Buffy."

"You didn't think I´d come completely unprepared, didn't you?", she grinned, pushing his pants down as she stepped out of her own.

He kissed her passionately, sweeping her up and placing her on the bed. He didn't stop his mouth's journey over her body until she was thrashing beneath him on the bed.

"You're so beautiful, so sensitive to every touch, everywhere...", he murmured, tugging at the waistband of her thong and pulling it off.

"You like it when I touch you, Buffy, don't you?", he dipped a finger between her legs, finding her almost dripping wet for him.

"Angel, please...", she moaned, trying to get more of him, to get closer.

"Please what, love?"

"No more games, please, it's been so long...I want you, I need you, inside me, now!", she blurted out, blushing.

Angel moaned at her words, pulling his boxers down and off, easing her legs apart with his knees. She opened them willingly, holding out her arms for him. Once again he marveled at the sight of her, flushed with passion, passion for him.

"Make love to me.", she begged, whispering.

"I love you, I love you so much.", he replied, kissing her passionately.

Both groaned when he slowly slid inside her slick warmth, filling her so perfectly, so fully. He started to move, savoring every moment, slowly increasing the pace thrusting into her forcefully when she lifted her hips to meet him, to take him even deeper, wrapping her legs around his waist.

Kissing and panting, murmuring nonsensical love words to each other they drifted on a wave of passion, coming closer to the moment of completion with every thrust. His left hand ventured between their intertwined bodies to the small bundle of nerves, pinching it softly, sending her into a forceful orgasm. Feeling her flutter around him, he thrust once, twice, until he shot his seed into her hot core.

"I love you, baby.", he nuzzled her neck.

"Love you, too.", she murmured, unbelievably sated.

The snuggled under the covers together, simply enjoying the fact they were together like this again.

"Angel?"

"Mmh?"

"Do you feel bad about this? I mean, we're constantly lying...", she asked hesitantly.

"Of course.", he replied. "I hated lying to your mom. I hate it that we have to hide. But we both know there's no other way. Or are you having second thoughts?"

"No, of course not. It's just...all these lies that are going to be, the hiding. It'll never end.", she sighed. "Alone the last week has been so hard...".

"I know, love. But it'll get better once we're having something like a family-routine. Right now they want us all to spend time together, to be a family. But that'll change. It'll become more normal."

"You think?"

"Dad, Lilah and I were never eating together every day. We were living separate lives, coming together occasionally. That's what's different now."

"Because of me."

"Yes...and no. Things always change, Buffy. So does family. And you're...", he smiled at her, pulling her closer. "You're the baby. Everyone wants to protect you."

"I'm not a baby.", she protested.

"I know, sweetheart.", he kissed her. "But to the others you're the little one, the baby sister."

"So, you're not mad at me for complicating everything?"

"I like the complications you bring very much.", he grinned at her, sneaking a peek at her bare breasts.

They both started to laugh.

"Enough family business for now?", he asked. "It really spoils the mood."

She kissed him, kissed away his sorrow and his worries as much as her own. Right here, right now was time for them. Things could wait.

The phone was ringing.

"Hello? Darla Manners speaking?"

"Darla? Hi! It's Faith."

"Oh, hi Faith! How are you?"

"Good, thanks. Is Buffy there? I tried her room and her cell but she's not picking up."

"Oh, she's at a party, with Angel. At...Anya´s, they said. But wait...why aren't you there, too?"

"I...umh...I have to take care of my Dad. He's sick.", Faith quickly lied.

"Oh, I hope he gets better, soon. It's nothing serious, right?"

"Oh no, he's gonna be fine. I gotta go."

"Okay, bye Faith."

"Bye, Darla."

While Darla went back to the living room, Faith sat and stared at the phone. Gunn and Anya were in L.A.. Buffy knew that. So...where was she? There was no party that she wouldn't know about, too. Why didn't Buffy pick up her cell? Quickly, she dialed Angel's number. Nothing. Where could they possibly be without telling her or anyone else? Why would Buffy lie to Darla?

Faith frowned. Things were starting to get very strange. She definitely needed to talk to Buffy about that.

TBC....

So...what do you think Faith´ll do?

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Part 17 - The Thin Dead Line

Rating: NC-17

Feedback: pretty please... :o)

AN: Sorry for the long delay but I had most of this part finished when my muse went on strike and decided to take a break from writing this. I had to decide how to go with this baby but here it is. Oh, one more thing: this isn't a fairytale...just wanted to say that because this part and the next one will probably get a little tough...

Dedication: to Hannahbee for being so supportive while I'm having troubles with this baby, I think I´d visit you more often, makes my muse all productive *G*

Anybody that's been asking about this. Enjoy!

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She woke slowly, slightly disoriented, her eyes still closed, waiting for reality to sink in. This could only be a dream. But the more awake she became, the more obvious was the fact that there really was somebody watching her. Chocolate eyes, only inches away, met hers and a smile spread across her face. No dream. Definitely better. Soft lips covered hers and she sighed as she snuggled closer.

"Morning, sleepy.", his soft and sexy bed-voice rumbled.

"Morning." Another sweet kiss. "How long have you been awake?"

"Dunno.", he nuzzled her face. "I kinda lost track..."

"Is that so...", she teased him, lovingly tracing his face. Time hadn't been on her mind since she entered this hotel room. The night had passed in a medley of wild passion and sweet worship. Free of all boundaries and worries, just the two of them.

"This is nice...", she sighed.

"It's perfect.", he pulled her even closer, almost crushing her.

This was what he wanted for the rest of his life: her, in his arms. The world be damned.

She kissed him again and he was lost. How could he ever get enough of her? They had made love all night and yet he was craving for more. They melted into each other naturally and without hesitation. Time again disappeared around them as they made love, hungry for each other, a part of them knowing this wouldn't, couldn't last.

He took a last look at the room they'd be leaving any minute. Their bags were packed and his hand rested on the doorknob. Everything inside him screamed no at the thought of walking through the door, into the real world. As if she'd read his thoughts her arms sneaked around his waist. Together they stood, gathering their strength to walk away from their haven of denial, their shelter, them.

"I love you.", she declared, gazing up at him. "Come what may."

"I love you, too. Come what may.", he echoed and their lips met in a desperate kiss. It took almost all their strength to finally break apart and walk out of the room. They couldn't stay any longer without arousing suspicion and questions.

While Angel paid the bill, Buffy checked her cell phone, frowning.

"Faith tried to call me...", she replied to Angel's questioning look. He checked his own

phone, matching her frown.

"Same here."

"Strange. I hope she's alright.", Buffy mused while walking to the car.

"Call her when we're home.", Angel pressed her hand reassuringly.

Their bags in the trunk they finally found themselves in his car. Time to go home. She leaned over for a quick kiss that quickly turned passionate and was only ended by the car honking behind them. They drove home in silence, both deep into thoughts.

There was their house, their garage.

"I don't wanna go inside...", Buffy admitted, leaning against the door.

"Me neither.", he put his bag down next to hers to pull her into his arms. Eyes locked, mouths met, their lips on fire, their tongues searching each other, still caught in the night's magic, never knowing when they'd get another chance for this. Reluctantly Angel pulled away, helping her straighten her clothes. She looked up, searching his face and he nodded. Together they entered the house.

"Hello! Anybody home?", Buffy called and Darla almost instantly arrived from the living room.

"Hey sweetie, hey Angel. I thought I heard something. Did you have fun?"

"Oh, sure.", Buffy nodded enthusiastically and Angel joined her praise of the party.

"Lacking some sleep though."

"Well, you'll have to delay your nap for a while cause lunch's about ready."

"Ok, I´ll just get my stuff upstairs..."

"You do that. I´ll call you. Oh, Buffy, Faith called last night...she didn't reach you."

"Was something wrong?", Buffy asked, worried.

"No. I told her you'd call."

"Okay, uhm, I´ll be back in a sec."

Darla hurried away so Buffy and Angel went upstairs in silence. At the end of the hallway it was time to part.

"Thank you.", Buffy whispered.

He just smiled, unable to speak.

During the next days it became a little easier for them to sneak away and they savored every minute of it. Darla´s eagerness to tighten the familiar bonds seemed to ebb away when she became busy preparing for her new job. Still, dinner was usually family-time.

They settled into a more or less comfortable routine, stealing kisses in the hallway, fooling around in the pool or cuddling on the couch while watching TV with nobody around, still careful to not let things go too far.

Dealing with Faith on the other hand wasn't quite as simple. Buffy was pretty sure her best friend had bought her lie about a night out drinking with Angel while Faith knew better, knew that Buffy was hiding something from her. It hurt them both but right now there seemed no way around it. Buffy forgot about her guilt in Angel's arms and Faith knew she couldn't do much more than wait for her to open up.

Angel was lounging on the bed, reading, when the door opened without a knock. He knew who it was before he turned around but when he did, he sucked in a deep breath. Buffy was leaning against the doorframe, giving him a carnal look, sensuously licking her lips once she had his attention.

"Hello gorgeous...". Even she was mildly shocked how hoarse her voice sounded.

Angel didn't wait to leave his book for good on the floor, crossing the distance between them by pulling her into his arms. He kicked the door shut, delighting in her squeal, carrying her to the bed. His lips were aching to explore hers, kissing her until they were both panting for air, breaking apart with laughter of pure happiness.

"Where is everyone?", he whispered against her neck, teasing her soft skin there.

"Holland and Lilah are working and Mom's out shopping for her new business look again.", her hands roamed over his broad back, loving the way his strong muscles were flexing under her touch.

"Is that so...", he smiled seductively, his hands now moving under her shirt, needing to feel her bare skin again. She was so incredibly soft it never ceased to amaze him. Starting to kiss around her belly, he chuckled at her soft mewls and pants.

"So we're", kiss, "all", kiss, "alone...". He pulled her shirt up and out of the way. She nodded and sat up to rid him of his own shirt, desperately wanting his skin touching hers again.

"I missed you...", he murmured, nuzzling the soft skin around her belly, kissing his way up until he reached the valley between her breasts. "You always taste so good."

"I missed you, too.", she sighed, pulling him up for a long, deep kiss. Rolling around in a passionate embrace their tongues dueling with sweet abandon they got tangled in the sheets and started to giggle again.

They kissed for a small eternity, languidly enjoying every second of their being together, taking their time to make up for all the kisses they had been denied during the last days. Hands traveled over bodies, stroking, caressing, teasing.

"You're so beautiful...", Angel whispered before their lips met again. "Makes me want you more, every day...it's getting harder."

"I know", she sighed. Living with him every day but having to hide every true emotion was hell. But moments like these reminded her that it was worth it. She'd rather live through this hell for the rest of her life than live without him. "I love you so much...".

"I love you.", he echoed, drowning in her hazel eyes. He'd noticed the gray shade of sadness invading them for a minute and he wanted to take it all away.

When they kissed again it wasn't gentle anymore but angry, desperate and full of need. Quickly their other clothes were gone, their bodies bared to each other like their feelings. His hands traveled down to her navel, venturing lower, smiling at the fact that his hands there still made her blush. Gently he traced her clit, finding her already wet and ready for him. Dipping one finger just barely inside, loving the needy little mewl she gave, he leaned down to capture one of her puckered, rosy nipples, gently sucking it. He intended to tease her mercilessly. She was already close to begging. Not that he would last any longer. They were so engrossed in each other neither of them noticed the footsteps in the hallway, dampened by the thick carpets, approaching.

While beneath the covers Buffy wiggled to get more of Angel's talented fingers a hand was on the doorknob and as Angel moved to start another attack, Darla´s voice burst through their bubble:

"Angel, could you give me a hand with these...oh my GOD!"

Various things happened at once, like in slow motion.

Buffy, before becoming completely petrified, dove under the covers completely, luckily blocked from her mother's view by Angel's broad back, Darla came to a screeching halt, a hand covering her mouth in shock, staring at her step-son and a glimpse of blonde hair.

"Oh god, I'm so sorry...", she finally decided to turn away and towards the door. "I...I didn't know...god, I'm so sorry..."

"Uhm, sure. Maybe you could just...", Angel croaked out, fighting breakdown himself.

"Oh...yes, of course. I'm sorry...", she babbled before she fled from the room. The door banged shut and Angel dropped down on the mattress, reaching out for the tiny bundle beneath his covers.

"Buffy?", he whispered, needing her to say something, anything to assure him she was okay. After a while her face appeared, tears in her eyes, shock written all over her face. He reached out for her and after a second's hesitation she fled into his arms, seeking shelter.

"Oh god...", she whispered, barely audible. "Oh my god..."

Angel pulled her closer, pressing a kiss to her forehead. The clung to each other, trying to deal with the realization of almost being caught.

"I thought...I thought she was shopping...", he finally stated, his voice shaking.

"Me, too...", she nodded, stifling a sob.

They needed to be more careful, lock the door, make sure they were alone, they both knew all that without saying it out loud. There were no words for what happened. Darla walking in on them had been a warning shot, next time, if there ever would be a next time, they probably wouldn't be so lucky. They needed to make sure that there wouldn't be a "next time".

Facing each other, still holding on for dear life, time drifted away around them.

"I should probably go.", Buffy whispered. Soon Holland and Lilah would be home, dinner would be served and they needed to pretend again.

"You probably should.", he agreed, although he didn't want her to go.

After another minute of basking in whatever weird afterglow they were in, Buffy started to move. There were her panties, her bra over there. Angel handed her her shirt and, finally dressed, Buffy looked back at him, sitting on the bed in only his boxers, his face in his hands, like was going to cry any second.

"Okay...", he croaked out.

"Okay...", she nodded. She couldn't just walk out of the door, leaving him, not when he was looking like this. Slowly approaching she captured his eyes with her own, drawn to them like a magnet until she came to stand between his legs.

"We'll make up for this.", she promised, leaning down to kiss him, softly at first but growing more desperate. They both knew they needed to talk about this. But talking once again had to wait.

"Remember that I love you."

"Always.", he kissed her again.

"See you at dinner?", what a stupid question...but yet the only thing she could think of right now.

A nod and then she was gone.

When Angel entered the dining room later, he felt a little better. Darla had apologized again and he had accepted. They had agreed that she would respect his privacy and knock on the door before she entered his room again and both still too embarrassed for various reasons had quickly dropped the topic. Even with that in mind he avoided Buffy´s gaze, guilt-ridden, making polite conversation.

"So, did anything interesting happen today?", Holland asked. Buffy and Angel shared a short

glance, then shook their heads. Holland, of course, already knew about Darla´s little accident and just smiled his I-know-better smile.

Choosing the worst possible moment for bonding with her step-son, Darla chirped: "So, Angel, when are we meeting her? I never saw her leave..."

"Sorry?", Lilah interrupted, the only one lacking serious information. She nudged her brother who had suddenly forgotten to swallow his food.

"It appears your brother has a new girlfriend.", Holland offered the light version, noticing Angel's discomfort.

"Really? Well, that's...that's great!", Lilah beamed. "I wanna know everything..."

Fighting the urge to just run from the room or preferably yell at Darla, Angel sighed, searching Buffy´s face like she could give him the strength he was missing.

"It's nothing...", he started, once again hating himself for having to lie. Sitting opposite to him and therefore being denied the chance of at least squeezing his hand for support, Buffy couldn't do anything than hoping he'd hold on. Her mind was already trying to figure out a way to distract her mother but Angel went on bravely.

"I met her a while ago, I don't know where we'll be going and I´d prefer not to talk about it. It's kinda private."

Holland and Lilah smiled, being used of him not willing to share any details before he wanted to. There was just one more thing.

"But you could tell us her name, just in case we meet her.", Lilah teased him.

Name. Damn.

"Uhm, B...Barbara. Her name's Barbara."

Buffy frowned but was glad the grilling had come to an end.

Boy, was she wrong.

"So, honey, you're awfully quiet today. What about you?", Darla´s voice once again cut through the silence.

Buffy suddenly found herself the center of everyone's attention and looked up.

"Me?", she asked. Try stalling.

"Sure, sweetheart. It's been a while since I saw you dating..."

I can't believe she's doing this!, Buffy thought, feeling the blush creeping up her face.

"Really?", Holland jumped in. "But that's impossible! Such a beautiful girl like you...I´d expect the boys to line up before the door."

Buffy shook her head. "Nope, there's no one." Now it was her time to lie. Seemed only fair after what Angel had to go through earlier.

Lilah noticed her embarrassment, making an attempt to change the topic but found herself cut off by Darla again.

"Honey, maybe you should be less picky.", turning to her husband she added: "You should have seen the guys she turned down!" Facing Buffy again she decided to swing her final punch: "Maybe Angel's friend has a nice brother...wouldn't that be funny? You could go on double-dates and stuff..."

"Mom!", Buffy tried to stop her.

"...but that'd mean you'd accept that there's no Mr. Perfect, Buffy this is reality, not some fairytale..."

"Mom, please!"

"...Angel, don't you have any nice friends you could set her up with?"

A silence followed, then Buffy got up and rushed out of the room, tears threatening to come, unable to believe the way her mother just ignored everything around her. Maggie had always been able to distract her once she got this way, apparently Holland still needed to learn this lesson.

Angel debated whether he should follow her straight away, the desire to comfort her burning inside him.

"Maybe I should go after her...", he suggested, but Lilah had already left the table, indicating she'd talk to Buffy. Which left Angel with Darla and his father, wanting to run and fast.

What a day...

Upstairs, Buffy had already dialed Faith's number.

"´lo?"

"Faith, hey."

"Hey, Twinkie, what's up?"

"Can I...can I come over? For the night?"

"Yeah sure. Something happen?"

"I´ll tell you later...I just need to get out of here for a while..."

"´k. I´ll come get you."

"Thanks."

A knock on the door. But who? She couldn't deal with Darla right now without saying something she'd regret later.

"Buffy, can I come in?"

Lilah.

"Yeah, sure."

"You okay?"

"Yeah. That's mom. I know I should be used to it by now but she tends to surprise even me..."

Lilah nodded, understanding. She'd never really known a mother but by now she'd got a pretty good impression of Darla. "Are you packing?"

"I'm spending the night at Faith's. Long planned."

"Oh, okay...". Seemed like Buffy didn't want to talk about what happened. Lilah turned around to leave, feeling like an intruder.

"Thanks."

"What?", she turned around.

"For coming after me.", Buffy smiled.

"Oh.", Lilah smiled back. "No problem. You're welcome."

Lilah left the room, giving Buffy the privacy she obviously needed. Her stuff soon ready, sitting on the bed, Buffy waited for Faith to arrive and take her away when another knock came.

Still not willing to deal with her mother, she considered answering when the door opened and Angel stepped in.

She got up and rushed into his arms, needing comfort only his arms could provide. They held each other for several minutes, hands softly stroking over backs and hair.

"You're packing.", he finally stated.

"I'm spending the night at Faith's. I just need to get out of here for a while."

"Mmh.", he sounded disappointed but the truth was, he understood perfectly what her motives were. Only that he had nowhere else he could go, really.

"It's just too much right now...", she sighed.

He put a finger under her chin to look her in the eyes. "Hey, you don't have to defend yourself. It's ok. I understand."

"I hate leaving you...", she admitted.

"I´ll be okay...", he whispered. "We're going to be okay."

The doorbell rang.

"I´d better go..."

"Go, leave. I´ll see you tomorrow..."

They kissed briefly, knowing this could only make it harder.

"We'll talk tomorrow.", she promised.

"I love you...", he answered, watching her walk towards the door. She turned around, her hand on the doorknob, smiling despite wanting to cry.

"I love you, too.", she murmured, watching him approach, captured by his gaze.

This time their kiss was longer, more desperate, almost angry. Their first reminder of what they were actually doing had been a screamingly painful one. Maybe some time apart would help them clear their heads a little.

She finally broke the kiss, panting. "I have to go..."

"Okay...", he released her, opening the door. "See you..."

A last look back and then she was gone. He heard her greeting Faith, laughter and then the door. He was alone.

Faith sat on her bed, quietly debating what to do. Buffy had been silent all the way to her house and during the past hour she'd barely said a word. So much for telling her everything later.

"B?", she started, startling her best friend.

"Huh? Sorry...", Buffy mumbled.

"Buffy, come on, what happened? You haven't said a word since I picked you up. If you don't wanna talk that's ok...but you promised to fill me in earlier. At least give me a hint..."

Buffy sighed, suddenly feeling bad. After all, this was Faith. The one person besides Angel she trusted most in her life.

"It's stupid...but Darla was really horrible at dinner. First she grilled Angel about his love life and when she was done she started with me..."

Faith sighed sympathetically, remembering heated mother-daughter conversations about the same issue.

"...It's just...god, she can be so annoying sometimes! She just goes on and on...completely ignoring my feelings!"

"What did she say?"

"Oh, you know, that I haven't been dating in like...forever and that I'm too picky and then she started asking Angel to set me up with one of his friends..."

"Ouch."

"Yeah...well, she just kept going and I bailed."

"Poor thing...", Faith hugged her firmly.

"But how come she started the whole thing?", Faith asked after a while.

"Huh?", Buffy´d already been somewhere else again.

"The whole dating thing. Doesn't sound like a regular dinner conversation to me."

"No..."

"So?"

"Well...she probably will tell you anyway, she'll probably tell everybody from now on cause it's so funny, ha ha. She walked in on Angel..."

"And a girl? Holy shit...", Faith was stunned for a moment.

"Yeah. So, being Darla she just had to start asking questions..."

"Angel has a new girlfriend?", Faith interrupted.

Buffy shrugged, not liking the direction this conversation was heading.

"Since when? And who? Do we know her? Shit...are you okay with this?", Faith blurted out.

"Me?"

"Yeah. I mean...he hasn't been dating anyone after you, right? So...isn't it kinda weird?"

You have no idea.

"It's not really my business anymore, right?", Buffy started sweating, nervously fidgeting on the bed.

"That's not what I mean...I mean...come on, B!"

"God, Faith, I know!", Buffy suddenly yelled. "Sorry...", she quickly added.

"Buffy...", Faith was suddenly very serious. "You and Angel...you're over, right?"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean...you're definitely over, right? You're aware that you are related and that holding on to any feelings that say something else isn't good, right?"

Buffy sat there, stunned, unable to speak.

"Buffy? Say something...please.", Faith now almost pleaded.

Don't tell me you're...

"Faith...", Buffy sobbed, the days events crushing down on her. The shock of Darla walking in on them, the questions at dinner, all the lies she had told during the last weeks, it all became too much for her and she broke down, tears running down her face like a river.

Faith watched her, shaking her head.

No...

Gathering her last bit of strength, Buffy opened her mouth to speak, breathing heavily:

"Angel...he doesn't have a new girlfriend...the girl in...in his bed Darla saw...it...it was me."

Tbc...

Ok, I know...evil cliffhanger there *eg* Any ideas how it will go on? What'll Faith do? And will Buffy tell Angel? Anything? *g* Take a guess...

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Part 18 - The Yoko Factor

Rating: for this part? R-ish I guess, for language

Feedback: thanks for all the feedback on this, please keep going :o)

AN: Well, another 2 months since the last part...I´ll just blame the muse for leaving me in the middle of the chapter. It was tough to write. I know it's Christmas coming up, I apologize in advance for not writing anything more fluffy...but anyway: Happy, Merry Christmas anyone!!! :o)

Dedication: Hannah, sweetie...I'm sorry. I´ll get you some chocolate the next time ;o)

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A silence followed her confession, the only sounds heard were Buffy´s heaving sobs. Feeling too guilty to look Faith in the eye, she just shook with every breath she took.

Faith sat beside her, unable to move. Mentally she was still begging to wake up from this nightmare. This couldn't be real, Buffy didn't just say that. Ok, she had been suspecting that there was something going on that Buffy didn't want to tell her. But this? Faith had thought about attraction, maybe them having trouble to deal with their newly discovered relation especially now, with a whole family in the mix. She had known that Buffy and Angel had been in love with each other before they discovered they were related. But...Buffy was her friend. She knew her. She would never do something like that...even if it was difficult to move on. And Angel, he was older than Buffy, wasn't he supposed to stop, even if she couldn't? This...this was illegal, it was dangerous, wrong in every sense....thoughts went spiraling in her head. Confusion turned to anger and she finally opened her mouth to speak:

"Buffy...no. Tell me you didn't just say that."

Her best friend, or the person she had thought was her best friend until she dropped that bomb on her, stared at her and Faith knew she wasn't going to tell her she was kidding. Buffy was too desperate, too broken to lie to her about anything right now.

"Buffy...please, say something...god, do you know what you just said?", Faith started to get louder, suddenly glad that her dad was out of town once again.

"I...", Buffy whispered. "What do you want me to say?"

"I wanna know what the hell is going on with you...you, you drop that bomb on me and now what? I just say, oh, ok...glad she didn't notice the two of you?"

"Faith...stop....I´ll tell you everything...".

The brunette had started to pace the room, unable to just sit there. "Ok...start...did you...are you sleeping with him?"

Buffy nodded and added a small "Yes."

"Ohgod...I can't believe I'm asking this, but it's been just this once, right?"

"No...", Buffy admitted. There was no sense in lying now that the cat was out of the bag once and for all.

"No? God, Buffy, do I have to beat it out of you? Talk to me, dammit!"

"I...we...ohgod....", Buffy started sobbing again.

"Ok, when did it start then?", Faith knew that if she didn't ask they wouldn't get to anything that night.

"At...at the wedding."

"Oh my god...but...but that's WEEKS!", Faith screamed, noticing Buffy cringe.

"We...remember Angel and I had some cocktails after you left?...It got late and it was so...I dunno, so unreal. We went to our rooms and...we had kissed before that, at the church..."

"...at the church? God, Buffy!"

"...and then it happened...we...and then we woke up together the next morning...and we...we knew that it was wrong and that we had to stop, but..."

"...but then you were alone with him for 3 weeks...."

Buffy nodded. "It just, it just happened. We know it's wrong but..."

"Did he force you?"

"What?", Buffy stared at her. "No...Angel would never do that!"

"Oh my god...", Faith murmured. It was all she could think of right now. Her best friend was sleeping with her brother. Well, half-brother, but still. And not once but for weeks now.

"What the hell do you think you're doing, Buffy?"

"I don't know, Faith...I don't know..."

"Buffy, this is serious! You can go to jail for this...you better have a good reason for this..."

"I love him.", Buffy whispered.

"God, Buffy, listen to you! Do you know what you're saying? You love him? I'm sorry...but that's not possible...you can't, you mustn't!"

"I know...we both know. Believe I've tried not to...believe me."

"Well, try harder!"

"I can't."

"B!", Faith now shook her not too gently. "He's your goddamn brother!"

"Don't you think I know all that? I know he's my brother. I know it's wrong and I hate myself for loving him. But I can't stop. I just can't..."

"But you have to!"

Silence followed again, both avoiding to look at each other.

"Faith...you know me...you know what I felt, feel for him..."

"I don't know you.", Faith's voice sounded suddenly cold. "I thought I did...but you're not the Buffy I know. The Buffy I know would never do anything like that."

"I AM the Buffy you know...", Buffy pleaded.

"Not anymore."

"Faith...please! Can't you try to..."

"What? Try to understand what it's like to sleep with my own brother? I'm sorry that's just not possible! You know, Buffy...there are rules. Morals. We live with them because they make sense. They help us define what's wrong and what's right. And what you're doing, it's wrong. There's no way around it. It's wrong. And usually we stop if something's wrong, because we know that sometimes we can't have everything. Every child knows that."

"Faith..."

"You. Can't. Have. Him.", Faith emphasized. "And don't tell me how much you love him because I think I'm gonna be sick then. You have to stop, Buffy. You need to realize that this isn't some soap opera where it turns out one of you´s adopted in the end and you can live happily ever after...there IS no happily ever after for you. You need to realize that."

Exhausted she dropped down on the bed again.

Buffy was staring at her and Faith knew what she was going to say before she opened her mouth.

"I can't. I don't know how to not love him. Because I've tried."

"Then try harder."

"Faith, please, don't you understand? I love him like nobody else before...he's my soulmate!"

"God, Buffy, you're 20 years old! You'll find somebody else, somebody..."

"...somebody normal?", Buffy continued for her. "Maybe. But what if I don't? What if I never feel this way again?"

"Then you don't. Buffy, please, I am not the one taking him away from you! You have to stop that! Go away, leave town, I don't know, whatever it takes so you can get over him...but you can't go back there!"

"What if I can't? What if I can't stop? I couldn't 'til now..."

Faith knew this was going to come up eventually. Maybe it was time for drastic measures.

"If you don't stop...this, you and me, our friendship, it's over."

"What?", Buffy yelped.

"I'm serious, Buffy.", Faith warned her.

"You're forcing me to choose between him and you?"

"No, you moron, I'm trying to tell you what's right! I'm trying to help you!"

"Well, thanks, Mom!"

"You don't get it, no?", Faith shook her head.

"It's not that simple!"

"It IS that simple! You know it's wrong. You just have to stop. I´ll even help you. But you have to stop seeing him. The sooner the better."

"I can't."

"Then you'll have to accept that I can't be your friend any longer. I thought I knew you, Buffy. I thought I knew you like no one else. But this, the way you are now....makes me think I don't know you at all."

"You know that's not true."

"I don't.", Faith stated. "You decide."

"So...what do you think?", Faith asked after a while, dreading what was to come.

"I think I want out.", Buffy had stood up.

"Out of what?"

"Out of this conversation..."

"Buffy..."

"I can't. I can't choose between him and you. It's impossible. I know you're right. But I love him..."

"Sounds like you made your decision..."

"I didn't. I just...I just don't know what to do. I just wanna sleep."

"Well, ok..."

"In my own bed."

"Oh...", Faith was pretty sure she got it. "So you're going to him...."

"No...maybe, I don't know. It's not...I just wanna go home."

"I´ll drive you."

"Don't."

With that Buffy grabbed her keys and got out of the door, even more miserable than before. Now she'd lost her best friend in the world, too. It seemed like everything was falling apart. First her family, than her whole life, and now Faith. Her Faith, the one person that had always been there for her, supported her, listened when she needed to talk, talked when she needed to listen, the one person that she had given a look into her very soul before Angel came along. Tears never seemed to stop flowing as she stumbled home, her sight blurry, her feelings in chaos. She wasn't even sure how she got home, but when she spotted the by now familiar driveway she realized she was shivering from the night air. Her jacket was probably still at Faith's together with her bag.

The house was dark, good. Hopefully there wouldn't be anybody asking questions.

Thankfully glancing at the key in her hand Buffy realized how quiet the house was. Unusually quiet, since it was a Friday night and therefore no reason for anybody to go to bed early. Granted, it was close to midnight, but still. She sighed again, glad that she wouldn't have to explain her early return and nobody would see her like this. Her world was badly shaken, her feelings upside down, guilt and the slightest bit of relief creating a turmoil. Quietly she closed the door and made her way up the stairs and towards her room. At the end of the hallway she paused, couldn't help staring at the door opposite hers. The brain screamed no but the rest of her being wanted nothing more than open the door, slip inside, into his arms, him. But she couldn't do that now, not anymore. Not after what she did to him, them. Stifling a sob she turned around, ready to curl up on her bed and cry her heart out.

She'd already opened the door when suddenly two familiar arms snaked around her waist, pulling her back. For a moment she allowed herself the luxury of leaning into him, savoring the feel of his strong, muscular chest against her back, the way his soft lips kissed and nuzzled her neck while his voice whispered a sweet welcome.

"Didn't think you'd be back before tomorrow morning..."

Realizing where she was, she immediately stiffened in his embrace, only now becoming aware of the fact that her fingers were intertwined with his against her stomach.

"Sh, it's ok...", he continued, nibbling at her earlobe, turning her into mush despite her better knowledge. "They're all gone. Late night movie..."

"Stop...", she pleaded, trying the best she could to pull away from him.

"I was sitting here, all alone, thinking of you...and there you are...", he continued, taking her struggles as her part in the playful act of foreplay.

"Angel, please...", her voice was what made him realize she wasn't joking.

"Baby, what's wrong?", he turned her around but she refused to look at him. Tears were already welling up in her eyes and a small sob escaped her throat.

"Hey, shh....it's ok...", he reached out to pull her into his arms but once again she took another step back.

"Nothing's ok...", she mumbled.

"Is this about what Darla said?", he decided to take a guess. "Did you and Faith have a fight?"

Only now did she look up, tears running down her face and he sucked in a sharp breath, shocked at how utterly miserable she looked.

"Bu...", he stopped in mid sentence when she nodded.

"I told her, Angel. I told her everything...."

"Everything about what?", he automatically asked, his brain not yet being able to grasp the possible truth behind her words.

"Everything. Me. You. Us.", she started shaking, the agony rippling through her in waves.

"What?", he gasped, gripping the open door for support.

"Angel, please...I...I had to."

"You did WHAT?", he repeated a little louder. "What do you mean, you HAD to?"

Still avoiding eye contact she slumped down on her bed.

"It was too late...she already knew...she knew everything."

"What?", he yelped again. This could only be a dream. A bad dream, a nightmare of the worst kind.

"Angel...", she started, not sure what she wanted to say, not sure what could be said now. The look on his face made her cringe. Seeing Faith's worry turn into horror and finally disgust had been bad. But it was nothing compared to the ultimate betrayal reflected in his beautiful features.

"What did you do, Buffy...what did you do?", he whispered, more to himself than for her ears.

"Angel, please..."

"God, are you out of your mind? How could you tell her? Do you realize what that means?" Anger and terror were flowing through his veins, mixing with fear and creating turmoil of feelings.

"I didn't mean to tell her...she knew..."

"She knew? How could she know if not from you?"

"She just knew, Angel. I've known her all my life, of course she'd notice if something's wrong!"

"So you did tell her!"

"No! God, she asked me, straight in the face if there is something between us. I..."

"You could have lied."

"I can't. I can't lie to her any better than I can lie to you. My whole life's become one big lie...I just couldn't take it anymore..."

"Do you think it's easy for me? I have to lie, too!"

"I know, baby. I know...", she sobbed. "All the lies to Mom, to Holland and Lilah...to everyone around us...Faith's different. I never lied to her, I couldn't..."

"This isn't just some girly secret..."

"I know! Can't you just for one minute try to understand my point?"

"No, I can't. Not when you tell her about us, what we do, what we are, so she can go and tell everyone!"

"She won't tell anyone! She didn't understand when I tried to explain, but she won't talk."

"How can you be so sure?"

"I trust her. And even if she wants nothing to do with me anymore now, she won't talk." Buffy repeated, still crying.

He ignored her agony completely, too lost in his own.

"I thought we had an unspoken agreement to keep this a secret..."

"Of course we have! But what would you have done...what would you do if Giles or Fred or Anya asked you, straight in the face if you were sleeping with me?"

"I´d lie! That's what we do, we lie, we pretend! Our whole life, our whole relationship is one big lie, Buffy!"

"Don't you think I know that? I live with that, too. Every day...I have to pretend, too. My mother walked in on us today! So forgive me for not being strong enough to betray my best friend!"

"But you can betray me? It starts with her and who's next? Gunn? Dawn?"

Her anguish turned into anger at his harsh words and with shaking legs she stood.

"God, listen to you! You're so self-righteous! Do you think you're perfect?"

"At least I know when to keep my mouth shut. What did you tell her? All the little details?"

"What...no. She wouldn't even listen to me...I´d never..."

"Don't say never, Buffy..."

She winced at the coldness of his voice. Would this day never end it's horror?

"Angel, please...", she started to approach him but he only stepped back, out of her reach.

"Look at me...", she pleaded. He shook his head.

"Are you that disgusted wit me? That you can't bring yourself to look at me?"

she broke down on the nearby chair.

"I know I've made a mistake, but I can't help it now. There's no turning back...but Faith, I promise you she won't talk...she'll probably not even talk to me after tonight...", once again she shivered, from the cold earlier, from exhaustion, lack of sleep, it all came down on her and made Angel finally realize her state despite all his anger.

"Did she kick you out?"

"No. She told me it was either her or you...I told her I wouldn't chose. I couldn't. She's my best friend...but I love you. How could I have only one of you? So she told me it was over. Our friendship's...", she broke down, sobbing so hard he was afraid she would choke. "And now I lost you both..."

He kneeled down beside her, tentatively reaching out. "You don't lose me. You'll never lose me. But I need some time to understand..."

"You don't have to lie to me, Angel. I know you're disgusted with me..."

"Buffy, baby, look at me. I love you. I don't understand your relationship with Faith. But I trust you. I don't think I trust her, but you do. We'll have to deal...think about it...there's no turning back anyway."

"Where do we go from here?", she whispered.

He shrugged, not having the slightest clue. "The others will be back soon..."

"Right." Their family. So much more they had to deal with. She rubbed her swollen eyes, suddenly feeling very tired.

"Go to bed...sleep...", he gestured towards the bed. "It'll be good for both of us."

"Ok...", she replied, numbly.

Before he closed the door behind him their gazes met briefly, then he was gone.

Realizing that he didn't kiss her goodnight, Buffy snuggled under the covers, still fully clothed but beyond caring, crying herself into a short, restless sleep.

Across the hall Angel stared at the ceiling, thoughts running amok inside his head, trying to find a way to understand everything that happened today. Eventually he gave up, tossing and turning during his light and troubled slumber.

TBC...

Any guesses? *G*

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Part 19 - Homecoming

Rating: NC-17

Feedback: pretty please?!

Dedication: to all people reading this, to Hannahbee for discussing this :o)

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Eager to avoid talking to every family member that might cross her path, Buffy quietly snuck into the kitchen to grab some coffee before she headed back to her room. The last night had been hell and still she felt like during the day her life was even worse. Sipping the quickly cooling beverage, she flipped through some magazines hoping to find something that'd distract her but soon found herself staring holes into the air again.

Angel wasn't doing much better. He, too, tiptoed down the hall hoping not run into anyone. Unfortunately, he wasn't quite as lucky. Darla and Lilah were sitting in the kitchen, chatting and happily digging their way through a marvelous breakfast.

"Good morning, Angel!", Darla chirped.

"Morning...", he grumbled, reaching for the coffee.

"The croissants are lovely, you have to try one."

"Oh, good luck with that", Lilah laughed. "I've not seen him eat anything for breakfast in years."

Angel gave her a brief smile before he turned around to leave again only to be stopped by his stepmother.

"The movie last night was fantastic...you really should have come! Maybe you and Buffy can go and watch it together..."

He tensed when he heard the name of the one person he tried to forget at the moment.

Ignoring his nonchalant shrug, Darla went on: "Do you know when she'll be back from Faith's?"

"She's upstairs.", he murmured.

"Oh...but when did she get back?", Lilah asked, confused.

"Last night. Before you guys came home...whenever that was...". With that he just left the kitchen again, having enough of this interrogation.

Buffy had just dozed off when a knock at the door startled her. Without waiting for an answer her mother bristled into the room, sitting down next to her.

"Hello, sweetheart. Angel told us you were back already...I thought you wanted to spend the night?"

"Well, I didn't.", Buffy replied gruffly.

"Did you and Faith have a fight?"

"God, why does everyone ask me that?", Buffy exploded, already regretting her little outburst when she saw the worried expression on her mother's face. "It's nothing...really. I'm fine, she's fine...sorry, I'm just tired."

"Are you sure you're alright? You seem so tense lately."

"Mom, it's nothing...I just need to sleep."

"Ok...you do that...", Darla tucked a stray of hair behind her daughter's ear before leaving her alone. Sometimes she just didn't get what was going on in her little girl's mind. Maggie on the other hand always had been able to get her to open up, something Darla had always envied her for. Quickly clearing her head of all thoughts about her former lover, she went back to the kitchen. Buffy would come to her when she'd be ready for it.

It was early afternoon when Buffy was startled once again by a knock on the door. She'd d tried to get some sleep but only ended up crying again. So who would it be now? Darla again? Lilah? Or maybe Angel, telling her he'd made his decision? Quickly wiping her face, she tried not to sound too cried out when she finally answered the door.

"Yeah?"

Through the door came the one person she'd not expected to see.

"Faith?"

Her best friend, or maybe former best friend, just stood and looked at her and from the way her eyes were swollen, Buffy could tell she'd been crying, too. No words were spoken while they just stared at each other until Faith finally closed the door behind her and came running towards the bed, straight into Buffy's arms.

"Faith...I'm sorry..."

"Oh shut up, silly...", Faith hugged the blonde on the bed, both of them crying again.

"God, I'm so sorry...", Buffy whispered again and again, unable to believe this was really happening.

"Shh, it's ok....", the brunette softly stroked over the strays of blonde hair.

"I...I thought I lost you...".

"As if you ever could."

Finally breaking apart, both girls sat opposite from each other on the bed, smiling for the first time that day.

"I can't believe you came...", Buffy started but Faith interrupted her almost immediately.

"I need to get a few things out of my head right now, ok? So please, just listen?"

Buffy nodded, unsure of what was to come.

"That I'm here now doesn't mean that everything's ok, we both know that. I can't believe what you did Buffy, I don't understand why you would do something like this...I didn't know how to react to this, I still don't, not really."

"Faith..."

"Buffy, please. I came here because you are my best friend. I don't wanna lose you, I can't. I love you, even now...so that's why I came.

"I love you, too."

"But I...we'll need to do something. About you and....him, everything...so I made a plan."

"What are you talking about?"

"I'm taking you out of here. We leave, tonight. My dad has a conference in San Francisco the whole week and he agreed to let us come with him."

"What?"

"School only starts in another week and we need to get you out of here, right now. Maybe the distance will help you see things...more clearly, different, I don't know...but we're going."

"I can't just leave..."

"Why not? Because of him? You know your Mom's not going to say anything..."

"I can't..."

"I'm not giving you a choice, Buffy. You're coming with me...or..."

"Or what? Are you blackmailing me?", Buffy hissed.

"Blackmailing you? I'm trying to help you, you moron! Please Buffy...please give it a try...it's just a week."

Buffy stayed silent for a while. Maybe Faith was right, maybe she needed to get out of here a little. Maybe a week away from all this insanity was exactly what she needed right now. Angel made it perfectly clear how he felt about her telling Faith, he'd probably be glad not to see her around.

"Ok...", she finally agreed.

"Ok.", Faith sighed with relief. "Let's ask Darla and then I'll help you pack."

"Thank you, Faith...I know you're just trying to help."

"Shush now...", Faith pulled her up and towards the door, still keeping Buffy's hand tucked in hers when she opened the door.

"Angel.", she stopped dead when she saw him exit his room at the same time, causing Buffy to bump into her back.

"Faith.", he retorted without looking at her. Wow, this was awkward. He tried to get any reaction from Buffy but she seemed to be shocked into silence.

"Uhm, we gotta go...", the brunette blurted out, shooting a quick glance at Buffy who seemed to be completely lost.

Angel watched them hurry down the hallway, Buffy turning around to shoot him one last look and then they were gone. Banging his head on the door, he cursed himself for exiting his room at all, trying to figure out what they might be up to.

As Faith had suspected, Darla was thrilled at the idea of them going to San Francisco for the last week of their holidays together and so Buffy found herself soon back in her room, packing for the trip.

"Don't bring too much...we're going shopping anyway...", Faith called from the bed while Buffy tried to decide what else she needed.

"Oh, so you've already got plans, huh?", Buffy smiled at her.

"Yup. I'm planning on distracting you so much that you don't even remember what day it is. Shopping, clubbing...just the two of us."

"Sounds good...", the slightly distracted answer followed.

"You need to think about something else...of course we can talk, if you want to...you know?"

"Okay..." Even after what happened between them last night, the thought of not seeing Angel for a whole week hurt like hell.

"Ready, B?"

"I guess..."

"So, let's go then." Faith hopped off the bed and opened the door for Buffy.

"Listen Faith...you go, I'll come down in a minute."

"Oh no...you think I'm stupid?"

"Please...I just wanna say goodbye, I promise."

"Fine. But I'll stay right here."

Sighing, Buffy shrugged and knocked on the door to Angel's room. No answer. The second time she knocked a little louder.

"What is it?", came the tense question.

Carefully she stuck her head through the door. "Angel...it's me. Can I..."

He nodded and she closed the door, aware of the fact the Faith was standing there, glaring.

"I...I just wanted to tell you that I'm going to San Francisco with Faith for the week."

"Oh...ok, have fun."

"Angel, please...don't do this.

"Don't do what, Buffy?"

"Don't act like...like..."

"Like a child? Well sorry you feel that way."

"Angel, please...", she took a few steps towards him. "I know you're hurt. But I really think this is the best for all of us right now. You told me you needed some time to think...I just came to say goodbye."

"Buffy, I'm sorry. Maybe it really is for the best if we don't see each other for a while. Things with Faith are obviously ok again...so go. Have a good time."

"Ok...bye.", it almost hurt physically to turn around. Her eyes were searching his but he avoided her. "Angel, I...I..." Finally his eyes shot up and met hers. Their stare was interrupted by Faith banging on the door.

"B, you're coming?"

Shaken out of the brief moment they had, Buffy blushed involuntarily.

"Goodbye...", she whispered once again.

"Goodbye.", he replied fighting the urge to pull her into his arms. The door closed behind her and he was once again alone.

One week later

Looking out of the window, watching the clouds pass by beneath them(,?) Buffy turned around to watch her sleeping friend in the seat next to her. They had really gone at it last night, almost directly heading from the club to the airport. In fact the whole week had passed by in a blur. Chuckling at the thought of all the clothes they had bought, Buffy lovingly tucked a stray of hair behind Faith's ear. Her best friend had really tried to distract her, successfully most of the time. It was only at night when things got worse, when all she wanted to do was call him, just to hear his voice. Faith's no-cell phones-policy had quickly driven her to the edge even though she knew it was probably best for her. They had talked a lot, argued almost every time a certain topic came up until they were both crying again only to go out dancing. They both needed the distractions the numerous clubs provided, their fake IDs enabling them to stay as long as the wanted to. One night when she'd been really drunk Buffy had flirted with a guy only to almost throw up when he tried to kiss her. Faith had brought her home, holding her while she cried her heart out until she drifted off into sleep.

Now that they were on their way back home reality seemed to be a growing shadow looming over their heads. What would happen now? Buffy sighed, wondering if he had even thought about her at all. Maybe he was just glad not to see her face around, thinking about a way to get rid of her.

Some hundred miles ahead of her the object of her thoughts was pacing his room. He knew she was coming back today, he overheard Darla on the phone earlier telling her daughter about the dinner that was already planned to celebrate her return. The week had been the longest of his life, being stuck with the rest of the family, all the times he wanted to call her, talk to her, tell her he was sorry for being such a jerk before she left. All the times he had slipped into her room just to have something that was hers, ending up pressing a sweater to his face, inhaling her scent. Of course he had already forgiven her. He knew it wasn't her fault that she told Faith, he knew Buffy had a hard time lying, especially to her. Truth was he almost envied her for her trust in the other girl. And now she was on her way back from what had most definitely been a week packed with fun, shopping trips, dancing, laughing and dozens of guys flirting with her. What if she had changed her mind? What if she had decided that she wanted a normal life again, without lies and hiding? What could he really offer her? Angel sighed, looking at his watch for the hundredth time. Soon she'd be back.

There was something about flying that always calmed her down. Looking down everything seemed to be so small and unimportant, like as if she could only stay up here all her worries would disappear. Going back down there both thrilled and terrified her. What would come next?

"Thinking about him again, huh?", Faith's voice startled her.

"No...", Buffy blushed. "Ok, maybe a little..."

"You don't look too happy about going back..."

"I don't know...I mean, everything's just so complicated..."

"Tell me about it."

Buffy shot her a funny look.

"You think this is easy for me? God, Buffy I've known you for so long now, I've seen you the past week, asking myself what to do, what to say..."

"Faith, you've been great this past week, you know that."

The brunette's expression suddenly got very serious. "You really love him, right?"

"Yes. I really do."

Faith sighed, sitting up. "Listen Buffy, I've been thinking."

"'bout what?"

"You, silly. About what I'd do when it came to this."

"This?"

"You two are obviously in love with each other. You've always been. I can't even begin to understand what you two feel or what you're going through. I know it's not easy, Buffy. But it's not supposed to be. You're not supposed to be together and you both know that."

"Faith..."

"Please, just listen. I know you two had a fight about me. But we can't change that, can we? I know what I know, probably more than I ever wanted to know, again something we can't change. During the last week I tried to distract you, to maybe make you see things more clearly but I know it didn't work."

"The last week's been so good for me, Faith, believe me..."

"I listened to you crying at night, talking in your sleep and I realized that the only person that can change the way you feel about him is you. So I'm not gonna push anymore. I'm not telling you what to do and I won't try to convince you to act different because I know I'll end up losing you that way, and I don't wanna lose you. I can't."

"I don't wanna lose you, either.", Buffy sniffled. "I'm so glad you understand..."

"Understand? No, Buffy, I don't understand, I'll not ever pretend to understand what you're feeling because I can't. I won't. Listen, listen to me carefully because I don't want to repeat this. I don't agree with what you're doing. I don't want to hear about it, I don't want you to come running to me for support. I won't cover for you, EVER, do you understand? I'll not make up excuses for the two of you and as soon as one of you is asking me to do this we're gonna have a problem. I know how you feel and that you're probably back together when we come home but if you have to do it, do it in private. The fact that I know about you doesn't make it okay for you to act different around me. No kissing, no holding hands, no...nothing that'll qualify as something not resembling a relationship between brother and sister. Do you understand?"

Buffy nodded, taken aback by the determination in Faith's voice. She knew her friend was dead serious about what she told her. "I promise not to do anything...ok?"

"Ok...I just wanted to get it out so we can go home with you knowing how I feel about it."

"Thank you..."

"For what?"

"For caring, for being my friend...everything."

They looked at each other for a long time and then directed their talk to lighter topics for the rest of the trip.

"Dinner's going to be ready soon...she said she'd be back by now.", Darla repeated for the third time, glancing out of the window.

"Darling, I'm sure she will be here soon.", Holland tried to calm her down.

"Maybe we should have picked her up at the airport."

"I'm sure Mr. Matthew's driver is taking care of that."

"Buffy still not here?", Lilah entered from the library. She'd missed the girl despite the fact they barely saw each other anyway. But maybe she'd get Angel to talk about what was bugging him, all the times she had tried herself he'd just brushed her off, assuring her it was nothing.

"Oh...I think that's her!", Darla jumped when the black car stopped in front of the house. Immediately she went to open the door, followed by Lilah and her husband.

"Angel, she's here!", Lilah called, hoping her brother would hear her through the depressing music from his stereo.

He didn't hear her but standing at the window himself he noticed anyway. Watching her carry two large bags towards the house, hugging Faith goodbye, sent a shiver down his spine. She looked beautiful, wearing what seemed to be a brand new shirt with his favorite pair of jeans on her, hugging her hips just low enough to accentuate every perfect curve of her body. He turned away to go downstairs, ready to face the moment of truth.

"Buffy, welcome back, sweetheart!", Darla hugged her daughter as if she'd been gone for a year.

"Mom, breathing's becoming an issue..."

"Buffy, come here...you look good.", Holland made sure to not crush her when he pulled her into his arms.

"Lilah, hi!" The sisters embraced each other quickly. "It's good to see you all again." Where's Angel?

"Dinner's almost ready. Come on, you gotta be starved...", Darla started to pull her daughter with her.

"I'd rather get my stuff up there first...I'm sure we have another two minutes, right?", Buffy smiled only briefly.

"Oh, let Angel carry that for you...these look really heavy.", Lilah suggested.

"You're not wrong!"

"I'm just gonna get him, he's...oh, there you are!"

Buffy's head shot up at Lilah's words, her eyes coming to rest upon the dark figure coming down the stairs. She heard herself suck in a sharp breath. How was it possible that after only a week he seemed to be more handsome, more sexy, more...

"Angel..."

"Hello Buffy."

His voice sounded cold. Oh god, this wasn't good. He was still mad at her, he wasn't even looking at her. How could she let herself believe he'd changed his mind after only a week? Buffy stood frozen in place.

"Oh don't worry...he's been like that for a week now.", Lilah smiled, sensing the tension in Buffy.

"Angel, dinner's about ready.", Holland intervened, gesturing towards the bags.

"Ok. I'm just gonna help you with these."

"Thanks."

Walking up the stairs, down the hallway towards her room she followed him, thinking about a way to start a conversation.

"Home sweet home...", she murmured when they entered her room but he didn't seem eager to reply to that. Great. Now they could not even do small talk anymore. She watched him put the bags on the floor, avoiding his gaze, leaning against the door.

"Angel, listen..."

She stopped when suddenly he came rushing towards her, shutting the door with a bang as he pressed her into it, his eyes locking with hers, his lips delving down to cover hers in a searing kiss. She squealed when he lifted her up, her legs clinging to his hips while his tongue begged for entrance into her mouth, kissing, licking, coaxing her to play. Only too eager she responded, drawing him deep into her mouth, needing to feel him closer and still needing more. Panting for air their mouths soon met again, both lost in the sensation of being together again. One kiss followed another while hands traveled over every inch in reach of each other, passion taking over, want spiraling out of control.

"God, I missed you...", he whispered against her neck, suckling at the soft flesh there. "I missed you so much."

"I missed you, too.", she replied, leading his mouth back to hers, moaning when his erection pressed against the wet spot on her pants. "Angel..."

The lost themselves in another kiss, still unable to separate, still needing to taste each other once again, needing to become reacquainted with each other. Forgotten was dinner, forgotten was their family. Her hands found the buttons of his shirt, rubbing over every inch of his soft skin she could reach while his fingers traveled up to unclasp her bra.

"Oh god, you taste so good...", he panted. There was way too much clothing between them, he needed her, here and now.

"Have to...feel you...", she pulled him into another kiss.

"Buffy, Angel, what are you doing? Dinner's ready!", Lilah's voice echoed from the stairs only barely loud enough to draw them back to reality.

Both froze, slowly realizing where they were. After the initial shock both smiled, kissing again gently.

"I'm glad you're back.", he whispered.

"I can tell...", she grinned, pressing against him once more before sliding down to stand on her own slightly wobbly legs.

"Ok...this went out of control...", he was still panting, only slowly letting her go to button his shirt again.

"Definitely...", she struggled with her bra behind her back.

"Let me help you..." He pulled up her top. Both leaned into each other before he finally closed the clasp again, pressing a kiss to her bare back before smoothing down her shirt.

"We should really go..."

"Do I look ok?", she went to look into the large mirror in the other corner.

"You look beautiful. Rumpled, but beautiful.", he cupped her cheek.

"Let's go then."

Another quick kiss and they went to face the family.

When he'd looked at it from the outside Angel would probably have found the dinner to be very amusing. Being a part of it however was more like trying to walk on really thin ice. Buffy was glowing from their earlier activities and was doing her best to avoid looking at him for too long, answering the questions Darla hammered her with, barely managing to eat during all the talking she had to do. Angel on the other side found it hard to care for food while looking at her, hearing her talk excitedly about all the things she and Faith had done the past week. He couldn't help being a little jealous even though he started to doubt that the two girls had had a happy sunshine life in San Francisco. When Darla started talking about her first week back at work Buffy and Angel finally got the chance of looking at each other more often, accidentally brushing against each other under the table so that need was soon driving them crazy again.

Shooting him a very pointed look, Buffy started yawning heartily.

"Buffy, you look tired.", Holland was the first to notice.

"Yeah, didn't get much sleep last night, plus the trip home...you know.", she lied shamelessly.

"Of course. And school starts tomorrow! You should really get some rest", Darla seemed to notice that her daughter might have enough for one evening.

"I guess...I´ll leave unpacking for tomorrow.", she yawned again. "Oh, I'm so sorry...".

"Sweetheart, go to bed. When is your first class?"

"No class tomorrow, just getting organized. I'm meeting Faith at 10."

"Oh, ok. Remember to leave me you schedule once you know for sure...now go to bed."

"Alright, good night everyone!"

Angel waited for another five minutes before he started to get up as well. "I'm just gonna go to bed, too."

"But it's early for you."

"I know...but I've got this sudden headache and I don't wanna miss the first day on campus."

"Ok...you go to bed then.", Darla shot him a worried glance. "I hope it's nothing serious."

"Probably not, I banged my head earlier. It's gonna be fine by tomorrow I'm sure."

With this horrible excuse for a lie he closed the dining room door behind him, fighting hard not to sprint up the stairs.

Knocking on her door he didn't get an answer. His suspicion was confirmed when he found her nowhere to be seen. Turning around he entered his own room, smiling all over his face when he discovered her cuddled on his sofa.

"Hey there.", he approached her after making sure he'd locked the door.

"Hey yourself.", she beamed, pulling him down on the couch with her. His broad frame hovering above her she once again was struck by how much she wanted him. The feeling seemed to be mutual because he leaned down for a sweet kiss.

Once again one thing lead to another and soon they were locked in a passionate embrace, kissing as if their lives depended on it.

Eager to continue what they had started earlier her hands started to unbutton his shirt once again. With his help she soon had it off and him bared to her gaze. Her fingers traced every rippling muscle, setting him on fire. He needed to feel her skin on his and soon. Impatiently he tugged at her own shirt, relishing in the giggle he got from her.

"You don't like my new shirt?"

"I think I prefer it off."

"Really?"

"Any complaints, madam?"

"No, kind sir, no complaints. Proceed as you wish."

"As I wish, huh?", he leered, loving the way she still blushed when things got too blunt.

The next minutes passed by in silence while he kissed around her now bare belly, ever so slowly moving upwards until he finally came to rest on her right nipple. Already standing out through the thin material, he laved it with his tongue until it was diamond hard.

"Oh god, Angel...feels so good....", she whimpered, impatiently moving him to the other nipple. Her hands were roaming over his back, pulling him closer.

Once again they were interrupted, this time by a knock on the door.

"Angel?"

Darla.

"Uhm, yes?"

"I have some aspirin for you..."

Buffy stared at him incredulously. "What are we gonna do?", she whispered frantically, all the memories of the last incident rushing back to her.

"Sh, it's ok...", he tried to calm her down. Thank god he'd locked the door.

"Uhm, thanks...but I already took some. I guess it's gonna be enough."

"Oh, ok then..."

Angel moved to open the door just enough to peek out. "Thanks, Darla. But I think I'm going to bed now."

"Ok, Buffy's already asleep. Poor thing, she must be really tired. Didn't even answer the door. Better we'll just let her sleep."

"We'll do that. Good night."

Angel locked the door again, turning around to face Buffy. She was sitting on the edge of the couch, clutching her knees to her chest.

"Buffy?"

She looked at him with large eyes and he immediately got lost in her. "What are we doing?"

"Sh, it's ok...it's not like before...", he came to sit beside her, pulling her closer, into his lap.

"I mean...shouldn't we...shouldn't we talk or something?", she leaned her head onto his shoulder.

"We probably should. I'm sorry, I didn't want to rush you. I was just so glad to have you back."

"Me too. And you didn't rush me. I wanted it, too."

"I know we'll have to be careful.", he found it incredibly hard to focus with her, half- naked in his lap.

She nuzzled his neck, pressing closer. "Careful, right."

"Ok.", he gripped her hips to move her so that she straddled him, looking him deep into the eyes. "The problem is, I...I don't wanna talk right now."

"It's hard...", she noticed the pun intended. "Maybe talking can wait for a while..."

He answered her with a kiss that left her breathless once more.

"God, I want you so much..."

"We can't, Angel...not here..."

"We'll be quiet."

"Quiet..."

Giving their best to be quiet, they shed the rest of their clothes, tumbling down on the bed, finally skin to skin again, frantic to become reacquainted with each other once again. Buffy grabbed a pillow when Angel slid first one, then two fingers into her tight channel, flexing them until she screamed into the pillow, his thumb drawing lazy circles on her clit before pressing down hard, sending her into oblivion.

"God, Angel...feels..."

"Shh baby...you have to be quiet...", he smirked despite worrying.

"Can't."

"Then maybe I should stop....", he teased her, pulling his fingers out of her.

"Don't even think about it, mister.", she gripped him, pulling him flush against her, trapping him in her arms.

"Ok, ok...", he smiled. "But you'll have to be quiet."

"How about you being quiet and start making love to me...", she wiggled beneath him, trying to get him to the place where she needed him most. Her hand found his by now painfully aroused cock and with a satisfied smirk she relished in the moan she got from him. "Quiet, baby...remember?"

Finally he couldn't take it anymore. He needed to be inside her. Placing himself at her entrance, he covered her mouth with his when he entered her after what seemed to be like an eternity. This was home, this was where they both felt they truly belonged, the only place they wanted to be. He started to move, carefully at first but then need overcame them both and they rolled around, making love with a fiery passion that threatened to burn them alive.

"God, Angel, yes..."

"Baby, you feel so good..."

"I love you.", she searched for his eyes and he stilled for a moment.

"I love you, too. Always."

"Always", she echoed, biting his shoulder when another wave of passion came rushing trough her.

Too quickly nearing the end of their reunion, he pulled her closer, scraping against her clit with every move now, soon sending her into her second climax muffled by his broad shoulder. When he felt her flexing and fluttering around him, he couldn't hold back anymore and let go. Unable to stifle his moan he pressed against her neck, holding her close until they both felt like they were able to move again.

"That was incredible...", she whispered, tracing his damp face.

"You are incredible my love.", he kissed her forehead until he covered them both with the blanket.

They fell into a peaceful slumber together, waking up hours later. Only then did they finally talk about what would happen next, trying to prepare for what was to come. They both knew they needed to be careful, especially with the new rules Faith had set up for them, especially with their friends around at school and on top of all with their family always nearby. Their promises were sealed with a kiss and after making love for the second time they drifted into sleep again.

At 6 a.m. Buffy was startled by the alarm going off, at first not realizing where she was.

"Baby, you have to get up."

"Don't wanna."

"Me neither, but the others are going to be awake soon."

"Hmmmph...", she grunted, snuggling closer to him.

"Believe me, I don't want this any more than you do...", he nuzzled her face.

"I'm going, I'm going." This was how their mornings would be from now on. One of them would need to get up and go to his own room, trying to get some sleep, making everyone believe everything was perfectly normal.

"I'll see you, soon.", he kissed her.

He watched her get out of bed, grabbing her clothes strewn all over the room and it hurt him more than he'd thought to watch her go.

"Go back to sleep...", she whispered before she tiptoed out into the hall and into her own, dark room.

"G'night, Buffy...", she murmured to herself minutes later, snuggled into the shirt she stole from him, trying to find rest with the poor substitute for his arms.

TBC...

So, school starts and Faith knows what's going on...any guesses? *g*

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Part 20 - Live of the party

Rating: probably R-ish for that one

Feedback: Always appreciated.

Dedication: Hannah, sweetie, I miss you!

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Two hours later Buffy's brief but peaceful slumber was again interrupted by the annoying beeping of an alarm clock. She'd already hit "snooze" two times, trying to draw out the time she spent in the comforting warmth of her bed, when she heard a knock on the door.

"Buffy? Are you up?" Darla.

"Yes, I'm awake."

"I know, but are you out of bed?"

"Any minute!"

The door opened and Darla's blonde head peaked inside.

"Come on, honey! Breakfast's ready. And you don't want to be late on your first day back, no?"

"Ok, ok." Buffy sat up, clutching the blanket to her. No need for her mother to comment on her choice of nightwear.

"See? Up."

"I'll believe it when I see you downstairs. Come on, it's such a beautiful day outside."

Buffy groaned when her mother pulled the curtains open. Darla smiled radiantly at her grumpy daughter before she left her alone once more. How her daughter had become so sleepy was a mystery to her.

"Shower. Now." Buffy muttered to herself as she padded towards the closet. She'd long decided on wearing the new sundress her parents brought home from Hawaii, its color accentuating her tanned skin.

Feeling almost fully awake she arrived at the kitchen forty minutes later. Holland and Lilah had already left for work but Darla was still bristling around. Much to her disappointment, Angel was nowhere in sight.

"Come on, honey. You have to eat something."

"Yes, Mom."

"Feeling better?"

"Yup."

"Is Angel up yet?"

"Dunno."

"Poor guy, maybe he's still sick."

Buffy shrugged, concentrating on her cup of coffee. Darla watched her for a minute and decided to take matters into her own hands.

"I'll just go check on him."

As if he'd heard her, Angel chose that exact moment to enter the kitchen.

"Good morning, Angel! Feeling better?"

"Morning. Yeah, thanks. I'm fine." He answered, his eyes grazing Buffy's form. God, it should be forbidden to look that good so early.

"Coffee?" She offered with a shy smile.

"I'd love some." He slumped down on a stool. They shared another look but were once more interrupted by Darla.

"Are you giving Buffy a ride?"

For a second his eyes widened in shock. Then the innocence of the question settled in and he somehow managed not to blush.

"Uhm, yeah. Sure."

"Oh, this is so exciting. You two, going to college together for the first time." Darla clapped her hands.

"You think?" Buffy cocked an eyebrow. Sarcasm to hide her real feelings.

"You'd better get going. Hop, hop." Darla shooed them instead of listening.

Shooting Angel an apologetic look, Buffy obediently hopped off her stool.

"I'll get my stuff."

She heard Angel come down and reached for her bag.

"Bye, Mom!"

"Bye, sweetheart! Have fun!

"See you at dinner!"

"Don't be late…!"

Buffy rolled her eyes, opening the door to the garage. A thrill crept up her spine when she sensed Angel close behind her. He shut the door with a bang and immediately Buffy was grabbed and spun around.

"Hey." He whispered.

"Hey, yourself." She smiled. Her arms snuck around his waist as he bent down. Their mouths met in a sweet kiss, allowing themselves to relax for the first time that morning. They melted into each other, trying to gather strength for the day ahead. Tongues dueled, teeth nibbled and lips sucked in a playful banter neither wanted to end, the last night still on their minds. Eventually they had to breathe and reluctantly they disentangled.

"We should go."

"We should." She panted. Faith was waiting.

They drove in silence, holding hands for most of the time. His thumb caressed her hand every now and then, feeling her growing tension. At a red light he looked at her more closely.

"Nervous?"

"A little." She admitted.

"Why?" He caressed her cheek, loving how she leaned into it.

"Dunno exactly. Faith. New classes. People. Us…"

"Why us?"

"I wonder how this is going to work. Will we see each other? The others, will they notice? How is this going to work…there's all these people, everywhere. Girls. Will you even still like me?" She whispered, feeling stupid.

He leaned over and kissed her passionately.

"I love you. That's not going to change just because there are other girls. We'll deal. We'll figure something out. I'm not saying it's going to be easy. But you have nothing to be afraid of. Besides, have I told you that you look beautiful?"

She smiled at him gratefully and a little relieved.

"It's ok…"

The lights had long turned green again but they didn't notice, too lost in each other's eyes.

Faith was already waiting at the parking lot, watching them approach. They looked worried. But as far as she was concerned that was something she just had to ignore.

"Hey, B." She hugged her best friend.

"Hey Faith." Buffy leaned into her as if she needed her support to create a physical distance between herself and Angel.

"Angel, hi." Faith nodded. He didn't meet her gaze.

"Hi, Faith."

"So, ready for the next round at good old UCS?

"Sure." Buffy smiled.

"Then hurry or we'll never get to know where the good parties are."

Buffy took the hand Faith offered, looking back at Angel. He looked lost.

"See you for lunch?"

"I'll give you a call."

Angel watched the girls disappear in the crowd.

Time to find the others.

They actually managed to get together with everyone for lunch and when Angel and Giles arrived, they noticed to their surprise that the girls had occupied the whole table with their organizers and flyers in every color.

Angel shot a questioning glance in Gunn's direction but found no surprise there.

"Uhm, what is this?"

Buffy's eyes shot up to meet his. They both smiled.

"Party planning!"

"What?"

"Now, my friend, you'll be introduced to the Summers-Matthews-Party-Marathon." Gunn grinned. "And apparently Fred and Anya decided to join them." He continued dryly.

"The world's definitely doomed." Giles grinned.

"Update needed here." Angel waved.

"Just a sec.", Buffy replied without looking up. "No Faith, the Alpha-Party's on Wednesday, not Thursday."

"No way."

"Way."

Feeling lost, Angel decided it would be wise to just wait until the girls were finished. Which, to his relief, didn't take long.

"Ok. Gunn, write this down." Faith commanded.

"Aye!"

"Ok. Tonight we're at Delta Kappa's. Tuesday we're at Psi Epsilon."

"Oh, great. They have the best women." Gunn grinned. "Ow!" He glared at Anya.

"Wednesday's the big Alpha bash", Buffy went on. "Thursday we're at Faith for the Scoobie-Video-Night and Friday's free so far."

"Wait, what about Lowell?" Faith piped up.

"Right. Lowell's on Friday. Got that?"

"Think so."

"You're really planning on going to every party this week?" Angel asked incredulously.

"Sure.", Buffy grinned. "Those are the best."

What about me? What about us? "If you say so. Did you even sign up for classes?"

"Course we did."

"Just checking."

"Hee, big brother's watching you, Summers."

"Shut up, Gunn." She glared, ignoring the hurt the comment caused her.

Giles' head came up from his organizer.

"So what's on Wednesday?"

"What's wrong?" Buffy asked as she climbed into the passenger's seat.

"Nothing."

"Oh, come on, you have something - face." She looked at him closely. Her hands ached to touch him but they were still in the parking lot. "Are you upset?"

"Upset? Why? Because you're making plans for every night of the week without even asking me what I want to do?"

"I…I'm sorry. I didn't think…"

"Exactly."

"Angel, please. I didn't mean it like that. It's just, I got all excited and…"

"And you forgot."

"It's not like I can say 'oh, sorry, have to ask Angel first' in public!"

"But still…" He knew she was probably right.

"I just assumed you were coming along."

"What makes you think I'm not?" He grinned. God, how he wanted to kiss that pout on her lips away.

"So, we're good then?"

"'Course we are." He reached for her hand. "So, what'll you be wearing?"

"What?" she laughed. "Got any suggestions?"

"Mh, none that I'd like you wearing to a college party…" He leered at her.

"Angel!" She blushed.

"Well, as long as I'll be the one taking you home…"

When they were home there was only time for a quick kiss before they entered the mansion. Dinner was almost ready so they stayed downstairs, chatting with Holland and Lilah. Folding her napkin, Buffy soon excused herself from the table. She needed to get ready and pick an outfit. Angel's earlier hints had given her wicked ideas she didn't dare listen to. This wasn't a date. They were going to a party. With their friends.

Repeating that mantra she finally decided on wearing a knee-length black skirt with white floral print on it and a matching black neckholder top showing off her tanned shoulders and an acceptable amount of cleavage and left her back almost completely bare. Her hair loosely swept up and mascara applied she was barely finished when Angel knocked on her door.

"Wow."

She grinned. "You like?"

"You look beautiful."

"You, too." Mh, white muscle-shirt and dark blue jeans. Definitely yummy.

"Ready?

"Just a sec…" She grabbed her bag and leaned down to slip into her high heels. This was too much for Angel to take. Unconsciously he came closer, pressing against her tight behind teasing him by wiggling in the air.

She gave a small moan.

"Angel…"

They'd never make it out of her room if he kept that up. Suddenly she forgot what would be so bad about it.

He pulled her flush against him, reaching out, his hands covering her flat stomach, gently stroking. She leaned her head back against his shoulder and he couldn't resist kissing her bare shoulders.

The physical contact of his lips on her skin jolted them both back to reality.

"We have to go…"

"Are you wearing a bra?"

"What?" They both yelped.

He turned her around to face him. "I said 'Are you wearing a bra?'"

"Can't wear one with this, dummy!" she gave him a peck on the lips. "Come on."

He followed her dumbfounded and suddenly jealous. She couldn't go out like this!

Not in the least bothered by that, Buffy just shot him another wicked grin and yelled her good-bye to the rest of the family.

Once they were at the party, Angel found it hard to enjoy himself while keeping an eye on Buffy at the same time. He watched her dance, noticed that she drank from a beer a guy offered her and had a good time. To his relief she wasn't flirting. Every now and then she'd walk past him, giving him a look or brushing against him. Her face was flushed, only increasing her beauty, Angel mused. And so thought the other guys surrounding her. But she stayed with Faith, swatting hands away Angel desperately wanted to rip off.

"Come on, Angel. Dance." Fred came up to him.

"No, thanks."

"Just one dance, come on…"

Resistance was futile and once he'd given in to the music it wasn't really that bad.

"See? Doesn't hurt." Fred grinned.

His eyes darted over to where Buffy and Faith had been just a few minutes ago. Where was she?

Before he could excuse himself Fred had grabbed his wrist, forcing another dance on him.

Neither Gunn nor Angel knew where the two girls had gone. Another hour later they were still nowhere in sight. Horror-scenarios of date-rape drugs were already running through his head when suddenly Buffy appeared in front of him.

"Oh god, where have you been?" He fought the urge to pull her close.

"Bathroom. Faith had a little too much."

"I thought something happened to you!"

She saw the concern in his eyes and reached for his hand, squeezing it reassuringly.

"I'm ok. But I have to take her home. I'm going to spend the night, take care of her."

Which meant she wouldn't spend the night with him. Swallowing his pride, he nodded.

"You need help?"

"No thanks. I've got everything covered."

"Ok." Don't go.

"Angel, I'm…"

"Buffy, it's ok. Take her home."

"Good night."

"Good night…"

One last, longing look and she was gone.

Buffy managed to get Faith home and once her friend was safely tucked into bed and sound asleep, Buffy decided to do the same. Her eyes fell on her blinking cell phone. She smiled when she saw Angel's message:

"I love you. I miss you. Call me?"

On the way to the bathroom she already dialed his number.

They didn't see each other all Tuesday, somehow kept missing each other on campus until they were once more back home. Angel's excitement at hearing her voice quickly dropped when he heard Faith laugh. "B! No way!"

The brunette stayed for dinner, doing her best to ignore the looks between Buffy and Angel. She talked to Darla and then dragged Buffy with her to get dressed. Why did this have to be so goddamn hard? Angel sighed inwardly.

Back in his room he heard the shower running and decided to give it a try. But when the door across the hall opened, it was Faith again.

"Oh, sorry. I, uhm…just wanted to ask Buffy when you wanted to leave."

Never buying his excuse for a second, Faith motioned for him to come inside.

"Can I have a word with you?"

"Uhm, sure."

"I've said this to Buffy once and I'm gonna say it again. I know what you're doing. I'm not happy about it, but I realized that I can't to anything about it. Though your secret's safe with me…"

"Thank you, Faith. I…"

"Please, let me finish. I won't tell anyone. But I won't watch this. Whatever you two do, do it quietly. I won't cover for you. I won't tolerate anything in my presence. I won't…" She paused, looking at him. "Got that?"

"I understand."

"Keep your hands and everything else to yourselves. That's all I'm asking. Okay?"

"Okay."

"Oh, and Angel? If you hurt her..."

The door opened and Buffy stepped inside, immediately sensing the tension.

"What's going on here?"

"Nothing." Both mumbled and Angel excused himself, closing the door behind him.

If Angel thought last night had been hard, he quickly learned that he'd been wrong.

He knew Buffy's outfit was probably Faith's fault. Not that he had anything to complain about. She looked gorgeous. Sexy as hell and absolutely fuckable. The tiny tank top she wore exposed her tanned belly with every move she made. And move she did. Gunn had been right about Psi Epsilon having the best women. But they all were nothing compared to Buffy. She and Faith were soon in the centre of everyone's attention again. They moved sensuously on the dancefloor, almost lost in the music. Of course they had to be aware of the guys begging for their attention. They were drooling all over them. Not that Angel was bored. More than one girl came up to him, flirting, offering a drink. One even suggested they'd go upstairs for a while, but sooner or later they all went away, realizing that he wasn't interested. It was no big news that Angel Manners was picky, but this was unusual, even for him.

Even the guys noticed and started making fun of him. He laughed about their jokes, glad for a little distraction. He pretended checking out women with them and after a while he almost believed in his little charade.

Giles was glad to see his friend loosen up little; he was still trying to figure out what had gotten into Angel. Maybe he just had a bad day. Gunn caught his questioning look and shrugged.

"And man, look at Faith and Buffy tonight." A guy Angel new as Steve drawled.

"Yeah, I wouldn't mind finding out what other moves they've got, if you know what I mean." Another guy echoed.

Laughter and other comments followed.

Angel practically fumed with rage. How dare they talk about her like that?

Shrugging off Giles' hand on his arm he stood and stomped away, trying to get away from them before he did anything he'd regret later. But would he really regret it? The thought was so very tempting. Leaning against the next wall, he tried to calm down.

"Angel, you're okay?"

He whirled around to see Faith and Buffy standing in front of him.

"Yeah, I'm fine." He almost growled.

"Are you sure?" Buffy took a step closer. He seemed more than upset. But what had happened? She had watched him all night and nothing she had seen could explain this outburst.

She flinched when he suddenly grabbed her wrist.

"Can I have a word with you?"

He started to drag her away before Buffy could come up with an answer. Faith watched them go, contemplating on following them. Just when she decided to do so, Giles appeared and she lost track of them.

"Angel, stop." Buffy protested. "What's wrong? Where are we going?"

He didn't answer. He needed to find a quiet place, away from all these people. Finally he found an empty broom closet, dragged Buffy inside and locked the door.

"Angel, what…"

She never finished her sentence because his mouth attacked hers with fiery passion. Her surprise quickly became consent and she allowed him access to her mouth. His tongue invaded her, full of anger and bent-up longing. He hadn't been able to kiss her all day. He had watched her walk around like this and the guys' comments had simply been too much. She belonged to him.

Buffy moaned when he pressed her against the door, hoisting her up so that she could feel his arousal against her centre, her own wetness rapidly building, thrilled at his possessiveness. What had gotten into him? He bit her lip hard enough to draw blood and only the coppery tang of her blood made him pause for a second.

Trapped between his hard body and the solid wood of the door, Buffy reached up to cup his face.

"Hey, what's wrong?"

He leaned his forehead against hers, closing his eyes before he admitted: "I couldn't take it anymore. Buffy do you know how you look? Do you know how the guys look at you? How they talk about you? I can't stand this. It's too much."

"Shh…" She whispered, kissing him gently. The amount of his jealousy moved her. "I didn't mean to upset you."

"I know." He whispered, his nose nuzzling hers. "You didn't do anything. But I can't help it. I see you and all I want to do is touch you, dance with you, let the world know you're mine."

"I am yours. I'm right here, with you. See?" She gently kissed his eyelids until they fluttered open. "I'm not going anywhere."

He kissed her again, gentle this time. His tongue caressed the cut on her lip, apologizing for his earlier behavior. Her teeth nibbled at his lower lip before her tongue invaded his mouth this time, gently tracing each tooth, coaxing his tongue to play with hers. They laid all their feelings into this one kiss, trying to make up for the hurt they caused each other, making up for the time they had to stay apart. They kissed on and on, unwilling to stop, not even for air.

Only reluctantly they broke apart, panting.

"Buffy…" He whispered.

"I know…" She gently traced his brow with her thumb.

Somebody bumping into the door broke the magic of the moment once and for all. The outside world was back, threatening to swallow them all over again.

"We should go home, soon." Angel suggested.

Buffy winced.

"What?"

"I promised Faith she could stay with me."

He sighed. "What if you just steal away?"

"Angel, I can't…"

Angel groaned. This couldn't be happening.

"Baby, please…I need you…"

"Sh, please…" she was begging now. "Don't…"

"She won't notice…"

"She will…and I promised I wouldn't lie to her…"

He nuzzled her neck, sensing her reluctance. "Can't you at least try to get away?"

"Angel…" she traced his face, trying to make him understand.

"It's just Faith…she knows anyway." Before he could stop himself, the words had left his mouth.

Buffy pushed against his shoulders, glaring. "Don't. Don't say that. Angel, please…don't make me…"

"I'm sorry…I didn't…it's just that I miss you."

"I miss you, too…"

"I know."

"I'm sorry…"

"Don't be." He gave her a final kiss before he set her down on her legs again. "You should leave first. I'll follow. We have to be careful."

"Right."

He groaned when she closed the door behind her.

Wednesday went by in a blur and with a serious lack of sleep; Buffy found herself dozing off at the kitchen counter during breakfast on Thursday morning. Angel was able to catch her before she fell from her stool.

"Hey, careful." He gently traced her arm.

"So, the Alpha-party was a blast then?" Darla piped up.

Buffy gave her best to nod enthusiastically. "It was great."

"So, are you planning on taking things slow for tonight?"

"Movie night at Faith's. We'll all sleep there. It's closer to campus anyway."

"But we'll see each other on Friday, right?"

"Sure…" Buffy frowned. Was there something she should remember?

"Oh, good. Because your father is taking me on a surprise trip this weekend. We'll leave early Saturday morning."

"That sounds nice." Angel offered.

"It's so sweet of him. It's only our two-month anniversary after all." Darla smiled dreamily.

Was it two months already? Angel sought out Buffy's eyes. Realization dawned on her, too. Darla and Holland gone, Lilah in Baltimore for the week.

"So, we're gonna have the house all to ourselves?" came the prompt question.

"Why, are you planning another party?" Darla teased her daughter. She looked so tired already she started to worry about her nightly activities. But well, Buffy was still young.

"Nah…" Buffy yawned. "Just checking."

"Do you realize what that means?" She beamed at him, cuddling closer.

"Do you really have to ask?" He replied before leaning down for a kiss.

Despite their lack of sleep they arrived in excellent mood on campus, secretly wishing it was already Saturday.

But it was still Thursday and soon Buffy found herself at the Matthews' house, preparing food and trying to decide on a movie.

"So, it's Giles, Gunn and Anya, Fred, Angel, you and me." Faith worried her lower lip. "What about Lorne? Didn't he want to come?"

"He wasn't sure if he'd make it."

"Xander?"

"Have you heard from him lately?"

Buffy shook her head. "You didn't invite Ben, right?"

"I wasn't sure. I figured that'd be kinda awkward…"

Buffy nodded. "Guess you're right."

The bell rang and Faith ran to open the door for Anya and Gunn. She returned to the kitchen only to find her best friend stare holes into the air.

"Earth to Buffy!"

"Sorry…" Buffy felt caught and blushed.

"I don't wanna know." Faith blurted out before she knew it. "Uhm, sorry. I just…try to behave tonight, okay?"

The image of Buffy's rumpled appearance on Tuesday night was something she still recalled vividly.

"Yes, Mom!" Buffy rolled her eyes. "Do you really have to rub my nose into it every time?"

"I'm sorry…" Faith gave her a smooch on the cheek. She knew she was being a pain in the ass. But how was she supposed to handle this?

"Hey, what's going on in there?" Gunn yelled from the hallway.

Despite her earlier warning Faith was able to relax once everybody had arrived and the movie was running. After all the partying it was about time for something quiet, she thought, glancing around the living room filled with her friends.

Gunn and Anya were cuddled in a large armchair, Anya dozing off against his shoulder occasionally.

Giles was lying on his stomach on the floor, watching the movie intently while Fred occupied the other armchair.

Next to her on the sofa was Buffy, one leg tucked under her, the other one down but not reaching the floor. She shifted from time to time, leaning into Faith who then laid her head on her shoulder. But not now. Buffy's eyes were fixed on the screen, but her hands were busy somewhere else. Faith wasn't even sure if Buffy was aware of what she was doing and she didn't dare disturb the picture displayed before her. Angel was sitting in front of Buffy on the floor, his shoulders between her legs, his legs stretched out before him. He too was concentrating on the movie. But what caused an ache in Faith's heart was the way Buffy's hand absently caressed the nape of his neck, drawing tiny circles at the spot where hair faded into skin. From the expression on his face Faith was sure that if he'd been able to purr he would have done so. The intimacy of the gesture seemed so natural. He leaned into the caress, his one hand tenderly reaching out to brush against her dangling leg. Ah, now Buffy was aware of what she was doing. She tucked at his hair slightly and he leaned up to meet her gaze.

Faith sighed. She felt like an intruder into a private moment. The pure emotions displayed here tugged at her heart. They were so much in love, looked so happy. How could something like this be so utterly wrong?

Buffy heard her sigh and turned to find her best friend's gaze on her. And for once it wasn't criticism or judgment but sympathy. Her hand let go of Angel and she shifted on the couch, placing her head in Faith's lap. Twirling a stray of blonde hair around her finger, Faith smiled down at her. For the moment, everything was alright.

Gunn and Anya had been the first to excuse themselves. Being a couple and also first they were already asleep in the only guest room while the other watched the second movie. When the closing credits rolled, Faith hopped up, startling Giles who had fallen asleep on the floor.

"Ok, up for another one?"

Yawning all around was the answer she'd expected.

"Let's call it a night, huh?"

"Please." Fred yawned again.

"Ok. One of you can sleep on the couch. Fred? If you want…"

"If that's ok…"

"Sure. The guys can sleep on the floor, they can handle it."

"What about Buffy?" Giles frowned.

"Oh. I thought that was a given. She's sleeping in my bed. We're used to it."

Buffy smiled, avoiding Angel's face.

"Well then, you guys can use the bathroom across the hall." Faith pulled Buffy up and wrapped an arm around her. "And we'll disappear upstairs. Call me, if you need anything."

"Goodnight!" Fred waved.

"G'night everyone."

"Sweet dreams…" Angel offered, his eyes fixed to Buffy's. Unable to move Buffy let herself be dragged along by Faith. Not quite the outcome she'd expected. But then what did she expect?

In Faith's room she slumped down on the bed, pulling off her shirt and jeans. Faith watched her friend slip into a baby t-shirt and boxers, silent all the way.

"Go ahead." Buffy nodded towards the bathroom. Faith sighed. There was no way around this.

Buffy waited until she heard the water running, then quickly closed the door and ran down the hallway, down the stairs and towards the living room.

"Angel?" She whispered, afraid to wake the others.

"Over here." He whispered back, trying to make out her form in the dark.

Buffy took two steps and immediately tripped over Giles' sleeping form.

"Shit." She cursed. This wasn't going to work. "Kitchen."

As careful as possible they made their way through the house. Light was shining through the windows and they approached each other quickly.

Without a word their lips met, drawing them closer until they were joined from head to toe.

"I just wanted to say goodnight…" she whispered, thrilled by his topless form, his muscles rippling under her touch. "Goodnight." She kissed his bare chest. "Goodnight." Another kiss to his jaw. "Goodnight." Her lips found his again.

He moaned into her mouth, the urge to touch her unbearable. His hands traced the hem of her shirt before they touched her skin.

"Goodnight." He caressed her belly. "Goodnight." His hands traveled higher, drawing a gasp from her. "Goodnight." A thumb brushed against her bare nipple. He stifled her moan with his mouth, kissing her passionately.

"Ehem."

The voice startled them to the core and they jolted apart. Buffy whirled around to face whoever was there.

"Faith! Oh my god."

"Are you fucking crazy? What the hell are you doing?" Faith hissed.

"I…I just wanted a glass of water."

"And then what? You tripped and fell on his lips?"

"Faith, please."

"No. No 'Faith, please.'!" She glared at Angel. "Stay away from her or go home."

Angel nodded and went back to the living room.

"What are you waiting for?" Faith nudged Buffy, hard. "Upstairs with you."

"I'm sorry."

"No you're not. Are you out of your minds? I could've been anyone! What would you've done if it had been Gunn? Or Fred?"

"I know." Buffy sniffled. "I'm sorry…"

"I told you to keep it quiet. This exactly what I didn't want. God, did you even listen?"

"Please, let me explain."

"Fine." She crossed her arms over her chest defiantly.

"I didn't want things to go that far. I…I just wanted to say goodnight. And then, it just happened."

"You know, I believe you. But that's exactly what I meant. Things can't just "happen" between the two of you. It's the second time this week!"

"I know." Buffy sighed. "But you have no idea how hard this is."

"If it's too hard then, stop."

"You know I can't."

"God, you're hopeless." Hopelessly in love, that much was evident.

"I know. Forgive me?" Buffy pleaded.

"Oh, come here." How could she be mad at her, when she secretly wished for a love like this?

One of Holland's meetings was delayed and so, instead of having the weekend off, he had to work on Saturday. Darla was disappointed but what could she do about it? Her day was saved however when Holland called to inform her that he had tickets for the opera that night and that he'd pick her up and drive her to LA.

Their plans ruined, Buffy and Angel were close to going crazy. They had counted on spending the day together, in bed preferably, but found Darla in the kitchen instead. Reluctantly Buffy agreed on a shopping trip with Darla and Faith, so Angel was once again left behind. After sulking for a while he finally decided to seize the opportunity.

When they returned home, Darla immediately rushed to her room to get dressed. Buffy was just about to enter her room, when Angel grabbed her around the waist.

"You can't go in there yet." He whispered into her ear. "It's a surprise."

"Really?" She beamed. "Do I have to guess?"

"No, but you'll have to wait downstairs until your Mom's gone."

"Please, just a peek?" She batted her eyelashes.

"No. And pouting doesn't work." He quickly kissed the full bottom lip teasing him.

"You're mean."

"I'll make it up to you."

"Okay…" She faked disappointment. "I'll be downstairs then…"

Watching her disappear downstairs, he quickly ducked into her room again. He stopped in his tracks when heard the door to the patio open and glanced through the window. His breath got caught in his throat when he watched her take off first her shirt and then her skirt. Pinning her hair up in a well-practiced move she stood there, simply wearing a white bra and matching panties presenting torture in its purest form. Knowing full well that he was watching her, she grinned up to her window and jumped right into the pool.

Shifting to accommodate his growing arousal he watched her shiver from the cold water.

Unable to look away he got even harder when she emerged from the water, her underwear dripping wet and very transparent. Her nipples strained against the soaked fabric with every breath she took and when his eyes traveled down, he saw a nest of dark curls shine through her lace panties. Oh god, she would kill him one of these days.

Wiping off droplets of water, she decided on the ultimate torture. Her bra was unclasped in two seconds and she could've sworn she heard him gasp. Throwing on her shirt, she grinned up to him again. The thought of him, staring at her, made her feel light-headed and deliciously naughty. She stepped into her skirt before pulling down her panties. No need to spoil the fun to come later. Blowing him a kiss, she disappeared inside the house again.

Angel stood there, unbearably aroused. This was too much. 'God, Darla. Please hurry.' He prayed inwardly. He couldn't stand waiting for another hour.

The front door closed and Angel almost ran down the stairs. He found her in the living room, flipping through the channels and for some reason dressed in a tiny black dress instead of her earlier outfit. Must be new, he thought as he came up behind her.

"They're gone."

"Uhu." She acknowledged, pretending not to be interested.

"So, you wanna see you're your surprise now?"

"Dunno. There's this really interesting documentary on spiders I wanted to watch."

Now he knew she was teasing him. But if she could do it, so could he.

"Spiders? Damn, if I'd known that I'd have made other plans."

"Bad luck." She shrugged, close to bursting with laughter.

But ever since he saw her little peep show, Angel was on the edge.

"Buffy?"

"Uhu?"

"Fuck the spiders."

He reached over to take her into his arms. She squealed but didn't fight him when he carried her towards the stairs. The both laughed with happiness. Alone at last.

Then, the doorbell rang.

"This can't be happening…" Angel groaned. Was the whole world against him?

"Go away, we're not here!" Buffy yelled. It could've been the president and she wouldn't care.

The bell rang again.

"Just a minute." Angel whispered and gave her a brief kiss before he sat her down.

"Angel?" A male voice came. No, this couldn't be…

Angel opened the door.

Oh my god. "Jesse?"

"Hey Angel, man!" a tall, dark-haired man hugged Angel.

"Jesse! What on earth are you doing here?"

"Nice to see you, too!"

"Come in."

Both Buffy and Angel noticed the suitcase at the same time.

"Thanks. Actually, I have to ask you, can I stay for a week?"

What?

"Uh, sure! But tell me, what are you…"

Jesse's eyes fell on Buffy leaning against the wall.

"Oh shit. This is a bad time, right? You've got company…"

"No, of course not." Angel lied. "Buffy, this is Jesse, my best friend. Jesse, this is my baby…sister Buffy."

"Well, nice to meet you, baby sister Buffy." Jesse grinned, eying her appreciatively. "I've never heard of you, but I'm sure Angel will fill me in."

"Hi." Buffy managed to get out. This had to be a bad dream!

"The Bronze's still standing, right?"

Angel nodded absently.

"Let's go then. See you later, Buffy."

Laughing, Jesse dragged Angel out of the door.

He didn't even look at her.

Furious and sad she trotted towards her room. What had she done to deserve this? And who hell was this Jesse? When she entered her room, she stopped. Roses were strewn everywhere, vanilla candles were lit and soft music was playing. Next to the bed were a bowl of strawberries and a bottle of champagne.

Taking in the romantic scene, Buffy fell on the bed and started to cry.

TBC…

I've been thinking a lot about this fic…I planned for it to be much longer. But there are also other fics I'm dying to write. So, what do you think? Should I continue with it? Or should I write another 1-2 parts, then posting my notes how I planned to end it?

I really, really want some feedback on this…if you (don't) want more, simple yes or no will do. Please? :o)

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Part 21 - Harm's Way

Rating: R-ish for this one

Feedback: Pretty please? Because it's Christmas?

Dedication: Thanks for everyone who encouraged me to keep writing this, thanks fot the beta, Hannahbee *smooch* and Merry Christmas everyone!!!

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The next morning, or rather noon, Holland was thrilled to see Jesse at the breakfast table. Due to the boy's years of friendship with Angel he almost looked at him as a second son. It had been a long while since Jesse had been at the Manners' mansion.

"Jesse! It's good to see you."

"Thanks, Holland. For letting me stay and everything…"

"You're always welcome here, you know that."

"Thanks."

"May I introduce you to my lovely wife? Jesse, this is Darla. Darla, this is Jesse, one of Angel's oldest friends."

"Hi, nice to meet you, Mrs…Manners?"

"Darla is fine. Nice to meet you, too. I'm sure you've already met my daughter, Buffy?"

"Yep. Saw her last night…I'm looking forward to getting to know her."

"I'm sure you will enjoy her. She's wonderful." Holland smiled proudly. "But I'm afraid you'll have to wait until she comes down."

Angel stared at his plate in silence all the way through the conversation. He once flinched at the mention of Buffy's name, but put it off as a cough. He still vividly remembered last night.

"So…baby sister, huh?" Jesse asked him after they arrived at the Bronze.

"Long story…" Angel mumbled.

"Still wanna hear it…"

Angel sighed. "As it turned out, my father and Darla had an on-and-off affair for the last 20 years. We never knew about it until he told us a few weeks ago. Then Darla split from her lesbian lover to marry my father and Lilah and I got to know that we had a half-sister."

"Man! That's like a goddamn soap-opera!"

"Tell me about it!"

"So, she's Holland and Darla's?" Jesse asked but continued without awaiting the answer. "Well, she certainly comes after her mother. You two don't have a single thing in common."

Besides the sex? No. Angel shrugged.

"And you're okay with this?

"Sure, why not?"

"Dunno. It's a lot…"

"Mh…" Angel replied, not sure what to say.

"So, what's she like?"

"Who, Darla?"

"Yeah, well, she, too. But I meant Buffy."

"Oh…"

"I mean she's hot…"

Angel's eyes shot up, glaring at Jesse who quickly apologized.

"Little over-protective, huh?"

You have no idea.

"Sorry. You're probably right." Probably???

"See? Now we're talking."

"She's…she's great. She's funny. And smart. We like the same things, we get along pretty well."

"Nice to hear that." He paused and chuckled. "Hey, back in the old days she would've been exactly your type. Isn't that funny?"

Angel tried to laugh off his uneasiness. This wasn't the kind of conversation he wanted to have.

"So, anything new in that department?" Jesse nudged him. "Or anyone?"

"No." Angel shook his head. "Don't know why exactly, but that's the way it is…"

"Happens…"

"So, what brings you back to the Dale? Europe starting to get boring?"

"Actually, yes. I was thinking about switching to UCS. Or some other colleges."

"So you're gonna take a look at classes here?"

"Yup. Figured that'd be the best way to find out."

"Well, you missed the good parties…"

"Oh, don't think so. From what I remember there's always a party. So, forget it. You're not getting away that easily…"

Angel relaxed and soon heard himself laugh and before they noticed, they had talked the night away.

Buffy didn't come down for breakfast. In fact, Angel didn't see her all day. He spent the afternoon at the pool with Jesse, every now and then glancing up to her window, hoping to catch a glimpse of blonde hair. She never came in sight until it was time for dinner. Still no Buffy around, he decided to ask Darla.

"Have you seen Buffy today?"

"Oh, she went over to Faith's a few hours ago. She said we shouldn't expect her back until tomorrow."

"Tomorrow!"

"Yes. Though not definitely. Can't tell you what the girls are up to." She smiled, touched by his concern.

Buffy didn't return home until very late that night. She had considered spending the night at Faith's but since she had none of her stuff with her, she opted for going home. Entering the large house she once again noticed how silent it was, once everyone was asleep. A week ago she would have snuck into Angel's room and snuggled against him but that was not an option. The day had taken some of her anger away, even though she was still mad that Angel didn't even try to call her to explain things. He had just taken off with Jesse, ruining their romantic evening, treating her like…well, like she was just his little sister, leaving her with the remainders of his surprise. A part of her knew she was probably being irrational but a larger part of her was furious with Angel, mad at him because he didn't call, mad at him because he didn't even try to get rid of Jesse. Who was this Jesse anyway? Angel never talked about him…and what probably irritated her most about that was the fact that it pointed out just how many things she didn't know about Angel.

She tiptoed towards her room, only then noticing that apparently Angel and Jesse were still busy talking. Well, fine. Pushing every thought of Angel out of her brain, she went to bed, falling into a light slumber that did nothing than bring her confusing dreams.

Monday morning it was time for classes to start. Buffy got up in time; feeling more tired than before she went to bed but determined not to let anyone notice. She showered and got dressed in a pair of jeans and a shirt she knew drove Angel crazy. Payback's a bitch. The shirt was just short enough to offer a peak at her tanned belly with every move, the neckline dipping a little lower than she normally felt comfortable wearing to class and the jeans hugged her form just in the right places. Some make up and she was ready.

Angel almost choked on his coffee when he saw her enter the kitchen. God, she looked beautiful. Casual but yet incredibly sexy. But she ignored him, offering a cheerful "Good Morning!" to the kitchen.

"Good morning, sunshine!" Jesse smiled, taking in her appearance.

"Hey, did you have fun last night?" Buffy immediately started a conversation with him. Angel's head moved from one to the other in confusion and a little bit of jealousy at seeing them connect so easily. Was she doing this on purpose? Well it's working, isn't it?

Buffy continued her little game until it was time for them to leave. She climbed into the back seat without complaining and was fairly silent all the way to campus. They had just entered the parking lot when she piped up:

"Will you guys be at the Bronze tonight?"

"You bet we'll be." Jesse grinned.

"Ok, see you then…" Buffy flashed him a blinding smile, hopped out of the car and disappeared into the crowd.

Jesse wasn't sure if she really did see him - he most certainly saw her. Hell, he would have been blind in order to not notice her. He and Angel had arrived early and were now able to watch Buffy and Faith's entrance. As if to prove the reputation preceding them right the girls immediately drew the attention of every guy at the Bronze - as they had intended to. Their outfits were once again casual but sexy - Buffy was dressed in a pair of incredibly tight red leather pants and the tiniest black top he'd ever seen. The brunette holding her hand was wearing dark blue jeans and a white tank top that was almost see through. Once the girls had spotted them, Buffy introduced Faith to Jesse who had a hard time deciding which of them looked hotter.

"Ladies…wow!" He grinned widely. "Can I order you a drink?"

"I was just going to get us something…" Faith let go of Buffy's hand. She was positive that she didn't know the whole story of what had happened between Buffy and Angel but she knew Buffy was pissed and out for a little revenge. Which was perfectly fine with her, it wasn't like they hadn't done this before.

"Mind if I join you?" Jesse asked. "Angel, what's it gonna be?"

Angel waved him off and watched the two brunettes disappear into the crowd. As soon as they were out of earshot, he turned to face Buffy, grabbing her arm.

"What the hell is going on here?"

"What do you mean?"

"Oh, come on. Don't play stupid with me."

"I don't know what you mean, Angel." She struggled to loosen his grip until he gave in.

"You, showing up…like that. What…"

"What do you want from me, Angel? Stay at home until you care to explain? You just left without so much as a word!" she hissed, her hands on her hips. "You didn't even call! I was up all night, waiting for you but apparently you were too busy."

"Look, I'm sorry I didn't call. I didn't know he was coming. But he's my friend! I haven't seen him in ages! What did you expect, Buffy? What do you want me to do?"

Her response was cut off by the return of Faith and Jesse, leaving them to just glare at each other. Angel had to shake his head, she was clearly furious with him. And that made her look ten times more sexy.

Buffy quickly plastered a fake smile on her face, grabbing the drink Faith offered her.

Faith watched her friend gulp down half of her drink and made a mental note to dig into her later. She should probably know better than to ask but something was obviously bothering her.

"Come on, let's dance." Buffy put down her third glass of Bacardi Coke.

"Aaalright…" Faith grinned and took her hand again.

Jesse watched them, mesmerized by their casual sexiness. These girls were definitely something. Faith was incredibly hot but yet, somehow, she didn't hold a candle to Buffy. He shot a glance at Angel who suddenly seemed very grumpy. His best friend glowered after the two girls, not leaving them out of sight. What's wrong with him?

On the dancefloor, Faith pulled Buffy closer.

"Okay, I don't know what's going on between the two of you. You obviously want to prove something. Fine, I'll play. But you owe me an explanation later."

"I promise, I'll explain everything later. Just work with me, k? For old time's sake?" Buffy pleaded. She knew she was asking a lot but right now she couldn't think of another way to get to Angel.

"Oh, I'll work…" Faith laughed and both girls started to move.

From across the room Angel watched her pull Buffy closer until they were inseparable. He watched Buffy run a hand through Faith's hair and down her back to grab her ass. He groaned when the brunette nuzzled Buffy's face before she grabbed her by the hips, grinding against her.

"Little sister's got some spunk, huh?" Jesse nudged him.

"What?" Angel was startled.

"Oh come on…you have to admit they look hot!"

"Whatever…" Angel shrugged, not leaving the girls out of sight for a minute.

"But they're not…" Jesse paused. "You know…"

"What?" Angel yelped. "Of course not!"

He returned his attention to the dancefloor and lucky for him, Jesse, too, was easily distracted.

"So, you do this a lot?" Jesse asked, once Buffy and Faith had decided to take a break.

"What do you mean?" Buffy panted, still exhausted from her activities on the dancefloor and feeling a little dizzy from the alcohol. It was hard to focus on Jesse when it took almost all of her willpower to not look at Angel.

"Oh, come on…" Jesse nudged her.

"Well, ok…one could say we do this from time to time…" Buffy smiled innocently.

"You must be the dream of every college boy come true."

"You think?" Faith piped up from behind Buffy, pulling her closer.

"Believe me when I say uhu." Jesse nodded. "Right, Angel? I know some guys who'd pay for this…"

Angel looked at him, fuming. Didn't Jesse see what they were doing? That they were just trying to get to him?

"Oh, really?" Buffy grinned devilishly. "Definitely gotta remember that...huh, Faith?"

"Come on, Twinkie. Give the boy a break." Faith winked. "I think he's drooling."

Jesse blushed, feeling his pants tighten. This so wasn't good.

"What do you think? One for free? Cause it's his first night here? Well, actually, his second…" Buffy shot Angel a pointed look. "But I think we can make an exception…"

"Okay…but just because he's cute." Faith licked her lips with a devilish smile. Buffy so owed her for this…

Jesse was just about to ask what exactly he was getting for free when Buffy tilted her head backwards and Faith captured her lips in a sensual kiss that seemed to intensify with every second. He groaned as he watched the girls make out, completely missing the fact that Angel had left the table. This was too god to be true - but before he knew it, it was already over.

"Oh my god." He managed to get out.

"Yeah, we kinda get that reaction sometimes…Welcome to Sunnydale!" Faith grinned and pulled Buffy towards the dancefloor once again. Time to ask what the hell was going on.

Buffy and Angel still weren't talking until Tuesday. While Buffy gave her best to ignore the looks he gave her, Angel allowed himself to be distracted by Jesse's presence. Having his best friend around made him realize how much he missed their almost mutual understanding of each other. He knew Jesse was probably irritated by Angel's unusual moodiness and was glad that his friend didn't dig into him. After all, how could he possibly explain that not only was he in love with his sister who was currently furious with him but that he had to constantly restrain himself from dragging her into the nearest closet to make up with her in the most delicious way? No, talking to Jesse was not an option, even though he had to admit that he longed for someone to confide in. Buffy had Faith to talk about the mess they had gotten themselves in, even though the brunette made it more than clear that she wasn't interested in counselling them - she was there. And Angel knew, too, that Faith wouldn't let Buffy down. He was in this alone and the person he most longed to talk to was not only avoiding him, but driving him crazy with jealousy.

Angel sighed and ran a hand through his hair when he entered the cafeteria. He was supposed to meet Jesse here but his friend was nowhere in sight. Very much in sight on the other hand was a certain blonde goddess, casually leaning against a nearby column. Her long hair was floating down her back and he only too vividly remembered the feel of it between his fingers. Every now and then she'd tuck a stray behind her ear while her other hand held on to her book bag. It was obvious she was talking to someone - someone still hidden from his view.

Angel stepped closer, ignoring the people around him. Now he could hear her laugh and a new rush of jealousy ran through him. This was her flirty laughter, not the usual full-hearted laughter or giggle she so often couldn't hold back. It was his laughter.

His jealousy only increased when he was finally able to catch a glimpse of her opponent - Graham Miller, leaning against the same column, almost touching her. He was practically undressing Buffy with his eyes, not the least interested in what she was talking about. God, where the hell was Faith when she was needed? Angel growled. There! He had touched her arm oh-so-casually… Angel couldn't help but smirk when he saw her pull back. But apparently Graham wasn't one to give up easily. Angel watched the exchange for another minute before he had enough. Green, pure jealousy was running through his veins like the blood he needed to live. They needed to talk. Right now.

Just when he had crossed the distance between them, Graham started to take off.

"See you later!" He heard Buffy say and then Graham was gone and Buffy turned around to face a furious Angel.

"Angel…" she almost gasped.

"Buffy." He managed to get out tersely.

Silence settled between them.

"This is not what it looked like…" her eyes pleaded.

"Please don't do this to me…" his seemed to respond.

"I…I gotta go." She blurted out before he had a chance to say anything. Watching her disappear, he stared into thin air, dumbfounded, until Jesse tapped him on the shoulder.

Busy with classes for the rest of the day, Angel was almost able to forget about the incident, until he came home. Once again facing Buffy's closed door, he excused himself from Jesse and knocked. No answer. He carefully peaked inside but the room was silent and empty.

"Where are you?" he muttered to himself.

"She's probably already at the Bronze…" Jesse offered, grinning. "Sorry, couldn't help but overhear your little conversation."

"You're right." Angel nodded, inwardly pleading that his friend was right. Buffy's words echoed in his head, she had told Graham she'd see him later. Later where?

"Is everything okay?"

"Sure, why?"

"No offence man, but you're not exactly a happy ball of sunshine these days. If I didn't know better I'd guess some chick was on your mind."

"It's nothing, really." Angel tried to assure him.

"So there's nothing going on between you and Buffy?"

"What?" Angel yelped.

"You guys didn't have a fight or something?"

Angel let out a relieved sigh. "Jesse, I'm telling you, it's nothing. Just a misunderstanding."

"Okay…you ready to go then?"

"Give me five minutes.

Just when he had convinced himself that everything was okay, Angel was faced with Faith and Gunn. Alone.

"Hi guys."

"Hey man!" Gunn greeted him. "Jesse."

"Hi Angel." Faith gave him a sympathetic smile. It didn't take a genius to figure out Angel was on the edge.

"Have you guys seen Buffy?" he tried to sound casual.

"Nope." Gunn shook his head.

"She's not here tonight." Faith informed him.

Angel pulled her aside. "Where is she, Faith?"

"Relax, cowboy." She pulled her arm from his grasp.

"I'm sorry…" he apologized, realizing he'd went too far. "Please, where is she?"

"Sorry, can't tell you." Faith looked at him, feeling actually sorry for him. Sure, Buffy had her reasons to be mad but Angel looked like he'd suffered enough already.

"Faith, please…"

"I'm sorry." She patted his shoulder and turned around.

Angel just stood there, unable to form a coherent thought. Buffy wasn't here and Faith wouldn't tell him about her whereabouts. Gulping down the first drink Jesse offered him, he started to head towards sweet denial.

Wednesday afternoon was slow, class-wise. Buffy and Angel had originally synchronised their schedules, hoping to spend some quality time together. Instead, Angel found himself lounging at the pool with Jesse, basking in the autumn-sun. They weren't alone for long; laughter echoing through the house soon announced the presence of Buffy and Faith.

"Hey guys!" Faith grinned, heading towards one of the deck chairs.

"Hello ladies!" Jesse beamed, glad that his day had just gotten a whole lot better when Buffy, wearing only a bikini and holding a bright red Popsicle, stepped out of the house.

"Hi Jesse!" Buffy smiled. "Angel…"

"Buffy." He returned her short greeting.

"So, have you come up with a decision yet?" Buffy asked Jesse, avoiding Angel yet again and focussing on her Popsicle instead.

"Nope, still not sure. Give me a few more days…" He couldn't take his eyes off of her, it was impossible.

These were by far not the only words spoken this afternoon. Faith and Jesse were soon engaged in a vivid conversation while Buffy mastered the art of driving Angel crazy, licking and sucking on her Popsicle - sometimes seductively, sometimes almost ferociously. Every now and then she glanced at Angel, licking her lips and smiled a satisfied smile when he grabbed a towel to place it in his lap. Not that it didn't affect her, too… Angel remained fairly silent, trying to decide if Buffy's behaviour fuelled his anger or his horniness. God, she looked good in that tiny two- piece. And now the torturous Popsicle - it was almost too much for him to take. Visions of them in the pool were dancing before his eyes and he involuntarily groaned. Buffy caught his gaze and blushed deep red.

"Penny for your thoughts…" Jesse grinned.

"Sorry, but no…" Buffy, finally finished with her Popsicle, managed to remain calm. "I guess I need to cool down a bit."

"Rough night?" Angel blurted out before he could stop himself.

"What?"

"You heard me."

"Yes, but what the hell makes you think I'll answer that?" Buffy snapped.

"Oh, that good…" he muttered.

"Excuse me?"

"Uhm, guys? What's going on?" Jesse waved. Too lost in a mental debate about whether he should ask Buffy out he had missed the beginning of the fight.

"Nothing…" Angel replied quickly, his eyes shooting fire in Buffy's direction.

"At least I didn't get wasted…" Buffy attacked again.

"Easy to say when you've got no one to prove it."

"Oh, I need prove now?"

"Weren't you going to cool down?" Angel snapped.

Buffy shot him a last furious look and dove into the cool water.

"Sometimes I'm so glad I'm an only child…" Faith sighed, trying to ease the tension. Realizing that she was unsuccessful, she joined Buffy in the water, repeating over and over that this wasn't her problem and she needed to keep out of this.

Thursday night was once again movie-night. None of them had class very early the next day and so everyone gathered in the Manner's living room. Darla was accompanying Holland and Lilah to a conference, so there was no need to keep things quiet. Considering they watched one comedy after another, this was probably for the best. Buffy and Faith shared one of the armchairs, while Gunn, Anya and Fred were lounging on the sofa. Angel sat in the other armchair and Giles and Jesse were lying on the floor.

Faith couldn't help but notice that things between Buffy and Angel were still tense. They barely talked and if they did, they snapped at each other sooner or later. But with Jesse still there 24/7 it was probably not easy for them to find a minute to sort out their differences. Jesse…that was another chapter. She knew they guy had the hots for Buffy; she knew the dreamy look on a guy's face when her best friend was in the room all too well. And Faith knew that Buffy knew. She noticed that the blonde flirted with Jesse every once in a while, something that seemed to enrage Angel even further.

Must be hard for him…Faith thought. Not being able to do anything. She quickly shook her head. These thoughts were not helping things.

"What's going on in there?" Buffy tapped against her forehead with a mild smile.

"Oh, this and that…" Faith grinned.

"Sounds serious." Buffy cocked an eyebrow, keeping up their pretence of a serious conversation.

"Very." Faith nodded with wide eyes.

Buffy tucked a stray of brown hair behind her friend's ear and leaned back again. Her glance once again drifted over to where Angel was sitting, pretending to enjoy the movie.

She knew it was all a façade, knew it all to well from her own experience. Even though she was still mad at him, hurt from his snide remarks, a part of her wanted nothing more than to crawl into his lap, kiss him and tell him that she was sorry, that she missed him terribly and then show him just how much. She missed his smile, his jokes and the way he looked at her. She missed kissing him or just talking to him. Faith was right. They were both too stubborn to admit they were wrong so they caused each other even more pain. Their whole relationship seemed to be painted in either black or white, the different shades of grey were yet unused.

Buffy sighed and got up to go to the bathroom.

On her way back she almost collided with Angel on his way to the kitchen.

"Sorry…" she mumbled, barely looking up.

Silence followed while neither of them moved.

"So…you're having fun?" he asked, his tone a little more sarcastic than he intended.

"Yeah, it's a blast!" she snorted.

"Sorry for asking!" he sounded hurt now.

"Yeah, whatever…" she decided to leave but he grabbed her by the arm.

"Let me go!" she hissed but he pulled her with him and into the kitchen.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" he asked, still trying to keep his voice down.

"What's wrong with me? Shouldn't you ask yourself that?"

"Jesus, Buffy! Quit acting like a brat!"

"Oh, nice one. Thanks very much."

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean it like that…"

"Really? What did you mean then, Angel?"

"You think this is easy for me?"

"Yeah, that's exactly what I think. You're the one who always says "Oh, come on…it's just Faith…". Tell me, Angel, why do you avoid me all week? It's just Jesse!"

"It's different. You know that. I…I can't just…And I'm the one avoiding you? What do you think it is you're doing?"

"Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. Ever heard of that?"

"Oh, you're doing this to get to me?"

"Well, it's working, isn't it?"

"Oh please!

"Please what? Begging already?"

Without noticing their position had changed. Buffy's back collided with the fridge and Angel was now almost hovering above her. Their faces were inches apart, both red with anger and frustration. This was it; Angel couldn't take it any longer. Without further thought, he grabbed her and kissed her, hard. Her initial struggle ended soon, when her moth met his with equal fury. The kiss held nothing gentle or tender; it was merely taking their battle to another level. They mauled each other, biting at each other's lips hard enough to leave bruises and yet neither of them cared about visible reminders. The almost brutal kiss lasted mere seconds until Buffy pushed him away with all the strength she could muster. Tears were welling in her eyes and she backed away.

"Buffy, I'm…" he started to move towards her.

"Don't." she held up her hand. "Just leave…"

He took a long look at her and turned around.

Bracing her hands on the counter, the only sound in the now empty room her own ragged breathing, Buffy tried to regain enough composure to follow him back to their friends.

Friday night. Time to party. Buffy had been unusually quiet all day, not exactly grouchy, just…Faith took a closer look once again…sad? Why she didn't say. Faith had tried last night before they went to sleep but without success. Her best guess was that something had happened between Buffy and Angel, again. After her blonde friend sighed for had to be the hundredth time, Faith nudged her not too gently.

"Hey, what's going on?"

"Nothing…" Buffy tried but stopped herself. "Really, it's nothing. I'm just a little grumpy today."

"Wanna share?"

"Dunno…" Buffy shrugged. "Sorry I'm such a bore today…"

"Hey, forget it. We just have to cheer you up."

Buffy gave a weak smile, grateful for the distraction. "Suggestions?"

"Mh…" Faith grinned impishly. "What about we go shopping for a killer outfit for tonight?"

Buffy chuckled. "Special occasion?"

"Two young, extremely hot young women going to a party with countless young, extremely hot men?"

Buffy laughed. "Sounds like a plan."

"I knew you couldn't resist the call of the mall!"

Walking towards Faith's car, Buffy couldn't help but feel grateful for a friend like Faith. She hadn't even been sure if she wanted to go to Lowell tonight and just like that, Faith had yet again managed to distract her from all her sad, Angel-related thoughts.

Dressed in her new "killer-outfit", Buffy walked down the stairs, waiting for Faith to pick her up. In front of the big hallway-mirror she paused, to check her appearance again. Hair in loose curls, pinned up here and there? Check. Dark eye shadow? Check. Lipstick? Check. Black corsage? Check. Black micro-mini? Check. Boots or high heels, that'd been the hardest decision. Finally Buffy had decided on a pair of matching black high heels, if she wanted to show her legs tonight, she might as well show all of them. The outfit hugged her curves in all the right places, even if she knew it was risky. But, nothing to boost your ego like a new outfit, she mused, turning around.

"I'm not sure I should let you leave the house like that…" Holland stood there, smiling.

Buffy blushed, feeling caught.

"Don't listen to him, he's getting old!" Lilah called from the living room. "You look beautiful."

"Thanks." Buffy blushed even more.

"Still, I'm not sure…" Holland kept teasing her. "I assume there will be plenty of boys at the party?"

"Dad, don't you think that's the point?" Lilah laughed.

The doorbell rang and Holland moved to open the door for Faith.

"Hi Mr. Manners!" Faith grinned. "Ready, B?"

"Dad's still debating if he'll let her leave the house like that" Lilah approached them.

"I'm just kidding…but I want you two to take care. Two beautiful young ladies like you; I really hope the boys there will know how to behave."

"Maybe we don't want them to…" Faith laughed and pulled Buffy with her just as Angel and Jesse came down the stairs, stopping dead in their tracks.

"Wow!" Jesse gave a whistle. He was definitely asking her out tonight.

"I really hope you will have an eye on these two ladies." Holland still looked amused.

"You bet we will." Jesse smiled while Angel just stared; dumbfounded at the vision that was Buffy.

"See you then, guys!" Faith called and pulled Buffy out of her stupor.

"Have fun!" Lilah called after them.

They hit the party just when it started to get crowded. After a while, they were able to find Gunn and Anya and both girls were thrilled to see Ben with them.

"Wow!" he echoed Jesse's earlier words. "Slayers in action, huh?"

"Maybe?" Faith grinned.

Since the short encounter in the hallway, Buffy had barely opened her mouth to talk, threatening Faith's plan to cheer her up. She could still feel Angel's eyes on her, his stare boring into her. Immediately she had felt guilty about showing off that much skin in public. What the hell was wrong with her? She could dress like she wanted to; she didn't rely on Angel's judgement! Angrily she gulped down her first drink. The alcohol warmed her stomach and slowly spread through the rest of her body.

"Let's go dancing…" she pulled Faith and Anya with her, determined to have fun.

Angel and Jesse arrived a short while after them, fighting their way through the crowd. After long minutes they were able to find Gunn and Ben - alone.

"Where are the girls?" Angel tried to sound casual.

Gunn just nodded towards the dance floor, busy watching. So Angel did the same, watch. Watch her dance in her skimpy little outfit that threatened to either ride up or down with every wild movement. Watched her smile at the guys that had gathered around them. Finally they seemed to have enough and went in search of drinks. Five glasses were immediately offered to her. One by Graham Miller, he noticed. What was up with that guy again? Didn't he have a thing for Tara? Well, apparently tiny blondes were all the same for him, Angel fumed. In his anger, he didn't notice that Buffy didn't take the drink but the one Faith offered her. He didn't notice that her smile was a forced one and he didn't see her roll her eyes when her new partner in psych-class tried to make yet another move. For Angel it looked all flirty and carefree. Well, if she could do it, so could he.

Once the girls had made it back to their table, Angel had been asked to dance by more than two girls already and was busy on the dance floor. Buffy watched him interact with the blonde at his side and tears sprang to her eyes. She had driven him away, straight into the arms of other women. Suddenly everything around her felt wrong, she was cold, despite the heat in the room and no drink or joke from Gunn was able to cheer her up. Faith watched her and sighed. She was fighting a lost case. These two would never be easy. It just bugged her to see Buffy hurt so much.

"I gotta go." Ben announced after midnight. "I have a plane to catch early tomorrow."

"Vacation?" Faith asked.

"Not really. My Dad's getting married."

"Oh, good luck then." Faith smiled sympathetically. She clearly remembered the troubled relationship Ben had with his father.

"Thanks."

"Could you give me a ride home?" Buffy suddenly piped up.

"What?" All eyes turned towards her.

"I'm not feeling well today…maybe a cold. I think it's best if I just go to bed." Buffy replied with another sad look towards the dance floor.

"I'll take you home." Faith offered.

"No, sweetie, you have fun. Ben can take me." She assured her best friend. "If that's ok with you, of course?" she looked at Ben.

"Sure, I'll drop you off."

Buffy hugged her friends and promised to call Faith the next day and then, with a last look in Angel's direction, left.

When they were almost out of the door, Graham grabbed her from behind.

"You're not leaving, are you?"

Buffy disentangled herself and moved away. "Yes, I am."

"But you promised me a dance."

"Graham, please. I gotta go."

"But we have to set a date for our project!" he kept following her.

"I'll give you a call."

"Oh come on, Buffy…" he slurred, slightly drunk.

"She said she'd give you a call." Ben stepped in. "Good night."

Buffy smiled at him gratefully, pulling on her jacket. "Thanks."

"No problem…" he held open the door to his car.

Silently they rode through the night, interrupted only by Buffy giving him directions.

"So…is everything ok?" Ben asked.

"Sure…" Buffy nodded. "I just think I caught a cold or something…"

"And, besides that? How's Darla?"

"Oh, you know…Darla's being Darla." Buffy smiled, knowing Ben would understand. "I think she enjoys her new life."

"Good for her…" Ben nodded.

"How's Maggie?"

"Better, I think. She misses you…"

"Really?"

"Of course! We both do. You should come visit her…"

"Thanks, but I'm not sure…she said…maybe I should call first."

"You do that."

"So, Spike's getting married?"

Once they had started they chatted on and on, falling back into familiar behaviour. It seemed like a lifetime ago they'd been family.

"So that's where you live now…" Ben stopped.

"Impressed?" Buffy grinned.

"Intimidated." He admitted. "Looks nice."

"It is."

"Where's your room?"

"On the other side. See the window up there? That's Angel's room. Mine's across the hall…but I don't wanna keep you."

"Please. You're the one that needs sleep."

Buffy leaned over and hugged him. "Good luck tomorrow…"

"Good night."

He waited until the door closed behind her. Something bothered her…that much was obvious.

Angel finally showed up at their table again after hours. Even though he was slightly intoxicated he immediately noticed Buffy's absence. So she had really left with Graham.

"Having fun?" Faith asked, slightly snappish.

"Oh yeah. Pay attention so you can report everything back to her tomorrow." He snapped back, but not loud enough for anyone else to hear.

"I think she's seen enough."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"She left hours ago."

"With Miller, I'm sure he'll spill tonight's events in detail next week." He gulped down another drink.

"I don't think he's going to remember much tomorrow."

"Oh, thinking that low of Buffy's qualities?"

Faith just glared, fighting the strong urge to slap him.

"You know what? I'm not talking to you - not until you've come to your senses again."

Angel buried his face in his hands. How could everything get so messed up in only one week? A week ago he and Buffy had planned a romantic weekend and now she was with some guy doing god knows what.

"Getting tired?" Jesse nudged him.

"A little…" Angel admitted, suddenly wishing he was already home.

"We're leaving in a minute." Gunn informed them. "Need a ride?"

So they soon found themselves in front of the Manner's mansion, bidding goodnight to their friends. Silently, they made their way through the house until they were standing in front of Angel's room.

"What do you say? One last beer?" Angel offered. Or something stronger?

"Sure." Jesse grinned. "You got something upstairs?"

Angel nodded and opened the door. His eyes already used to the dark, he could easily make out the tiny figure curled up on his bed. He blinked, unable to believe his eyes. This wasn't possible…

"Uhm, hello?" Jesse interrupted from behind him.

"I…I just remembered that I don't have beer upstairs." Angel quickly closed the door before Jesse saw anything. "But there's some downstairs…"

Much to his relief Jesse bought the lie and followed him to the kitchen.

Angel quickly gulped down his beer, impatient to get upstairs. Faking some yawns cut their after-party short and soon they were in the bathroom, brushing their teeth.

"Good night." He whispered to Jesse who made his way towards the guestroom.

"Night, man." Jesse replied and then Angel was finally able to slip into his room silently. Closing the door, he decided not to take chances and locked the door. Pulling of his shoes, he carefully approached the bed.

Once Buffy had reached the silence of her room she couldn't stand it. Her outfit felt too tight, her make-up made her skin itch and even the prospect of crawling into her warm bed felt wrong. So she took a shower and dressed in a pair of sweatpants and a baby t-shirt and, after a moment's consideration opened the door to Angel's room. Closing her eyes, she took in the smell of him, lingering in the air as if he was right beside her. There was his shirt, carelessly thrown to the floor. She picked it up and pressed it to her face. God, how she missed him. Her eyes fell on the bed. No, she couldn't…but maybe, just a minute… Before she knew it, she had already crawled onto the large bed. His scent was stronger here. She closed her eyes again; barely able to keep them open now. Curling up in a foetal position she imagined he was here, next to her, making her feel safe and loved. His arms would sneak around her and he would hold her in the way only he held her. Buffy sighed and soon, she was sound asleep.

She didn't hear the door open and close again. She didn't hear Angel enter and she didn't wake up when he approached the bed.

Angel paused for a second to look at her again. Curled up on his bed she looked so peaceful, more relaxed than he'd ever seen her in the past few days and absolutely beautiful. Sniffing his clothes he decided to change into something clean, something comfortable. What on earth was she doing here, in his room, in his bed after all they'd been through; after all they'd done and said to each other the past week? Suddenly it was hard to remember what had caused them to fight, what had caused them to drift apart…everything seemed to disappear and what was left was just them.

Careful not to wake her he climbed into bed and approached her tiny frame. She didn't move an inch until he was pressed against her back. He felt her relax against him when his arm snuck around her waist to pull her closer. He buried his head in her hair, still slightly damp from the shower but smelling of vanilla and of Buffy. The tension inside his own body slipped away when he once again marvelled at how perfect she fit into his arms. Her hand moved to cover his in her sleep and he was so touched by the unconscious gesture that he pressed a kiss to her neck. A small sigh escaped her and he paused, hoping he didn't wake her.

But she didn't wake up and soon he drifted into a deep slumber, holding here tight against him.

It was still early when Angel woke again. He forgot to shut the blinds and now the sun was shining brightly through the windows. He groaned, ready to curse until he remembered the tiny bundle in his arms. Smiling, he looked down on her and pressed a kiss to her bare shoulder.

"Good morning, beautiful."

Buffy murmured something nonsensical and barely moved. It took a moment for her to register what was going on but when she did, a smile crossed her face, too.

"Morning…" she mumbled, turning around to face him.

She opened her eyes and met brown eyes watching her intently. "Hey."

"Hey." He replied, leaning his forehead against hers, not wanting to break the magic of the moment just yet.

Her arm wound around his waist and pulled him closer, mirroring his own movement. The smile on her face grew even wider when he tucked a loose stray behind her ear in a by now familiar movement.

"I'm sorry." They both started at the same time. Their laughter was a happy one, distracting them from their explanations.

"I'm sorry for what happened with Jesse, for what I said…" Angel started.

"No, I'm sorry for…for acting the way I did. I said things, too…"

"I didn't mean to hurt you, you know that…I was just…"

"Jealous?" she offered. "Well, I gave my very best to make you think that, didn't I?"

"Successfully." He admitted.

"Aw, poor baby." She laughed. "Did I give you a hard time?"

"You have no idea." He murmured before he caught her lips in a kiss.

Playful at first their kisses soon became longer, passion too long suppressed sparking up whenever their mouths met. Buffy sighed into his mouth and felt Angel's lips curve into a smile. She giggled a sound of pure happiness and Angel pulled her closer. His tongue sensuously licked her lips before delving into her sweet mouth again, where her tongue eagerly awaited his to play. Duelling for dominance, they fought a battle not meant to end quickly. Panting for air, their kisses grew languid and lazy, their lips swollen from teeth nibbling and gently biting. Shifting her leg, Buffy could feel his arousal and moaned, the ache inside her increasing from the mere thought of things to come.

Angel groaned and pulled away to look into her eyes again.

"We need to go away…when this is over, we need to go away."

Buffy expressed her agreement by pressing a kiss to his jaw. They really needed to spend some quality time together, soon. But for now, things were perfect.

Pushing against his shoulders until he was lying on his back, she crawled on top of him, blanketing his large frame with her tiny one. Her head came to rest on his chest, almost in the crook of his neck, while he nuzzled her hair. Angel's fingers started to draw small circles on the part of her skin left bare between her shirt and pants and Buffy gave a content sigh, listening to his heartbeat, tracing his muscular arm. Silence settled over them once again while they basked in the fact that they were here, together, in each other's arms.

Over an hour later, Angel was the first to speak again.

"So…you and Graham…"

Buffy's head came up from her comfortable resting place on his chest to look at him.

"He's my partner in psych-class, that's all. Prof threw us together, nothing I could do about it."

A relieved smile crossed Angel's face and he kissed her, softly.

"Nothing to worry about, I promise…" her thumb gently traced his brow. "Okay?"

"Jesse has a thing for me, you know?" Buffy continued, feeling him stiffen.

"Says who?"

"Faith. She said he already had the sad puppy look." She couldn't help but grin as a scowl crossed her lover's features.

"He better not try anything…" Angel growled, his suspicion confirmed.

"Why? Don't trust me to handle him?" Buffy enjoyed teasing him.

Angel suddenly flipped them, trapping her with the weight of his body to kiss her passionately. "You're mine."

Buffy grinned, amused and touched by his increasing possessiveness.

"I'm not going anywhere…" she whispered. "I promise."

"Good." He replied, moving in for another kiss.

Tucked safely against his side, Buffy's hand wandered over his body, tracing the muscles rippling under her touch.

"Angel?" she whispered, glancing up.

"Mh…" he replied almost purring.

"Let's not fight for a while, okay?"

"What?" he chuckled.

"Seriously." She sat up. "I'm tired of fighting with you. It's terrible and it hurts and…"

He stopped her by placing his right index finger over her lips.

"Sh, I know. I'm sorry…"

"Me, too." She once again crawled on top of him, hugging him close.

"I love you…" he whispered against her ear.

"I love you, too." She whispered back, snuggling into him.

Their basking was soon interrupted by sounds from the hallway, indicating that the rest of the family would soon be up. Neither of them wanted to leave the room, let alone the bed but they knew ignorance wasn't helping here.

"We…" he started.

"I know…" she nodded.

When she refused to leave her new favourite resting place, Angel was forced to try a little harder. Still extremely ticklish, Buffy was soon squirming and giggling all the while trying to be as quiet as possible. Finally they managed to get up and walked to the door, still holding hands, trying to figure out if it was safe for Buffy to leave.

"You hear anything?" she whispered.

"No. I think the coast's clear." He unlocked the door, peeking outside.

"Okay, bye then." She stood on her toes, kissing him good bye for an unknown length of time.

"Bye…" he pulled her closer one last time before he let her down, watching her quickly cross the hall and duck into her room.

"So, what's it gonna be on your last night here?" Angel asked Jesse once he had made it down for his first cup of coffee.

Jesse noticed the change in his best friend's mood from to minute he entered the kitchen. Must have been one nice dream he had. Hell, he wasn't going to complain.

"I don't know…the week's been pretty busy. Last night was a blast…why don't we keep things down tonight? Let's just hang out."

"Getting old?" Angel teased him.

"Look who's talking, Mr. I-sleep-'til-noon." Jesse grinned back.

Angel chuckled, keeping his thoughts on the matter to himself. "So…what kind of hanging out are we talking? Just you and me or to you want the whole gang over?"

"I say the more the merrier." Jesse shrugged. "We could make dinner or something…"

"Sounds good. I'll call everyone and tell them to be here at eight."

"Perfect."

As if on clue Buffy chose that exact moment to enter the kitchen. "Morning guys!" she smiled a radiant smile in Angel's direction but managed to grace Jesse with it, too.

"I see you're better…" Jesse smiled widely.

"Well, you know what they say about a good night's rest…" she hopped on a stool.

"Here you go…" Angel placed a mug of coffee in front of her, his thumb gently brushing hers in the process.

"Thanks…" She placed her hand on his for a moment, needing the contact.

They shared another smile while Jesse observed them from across the counter. What had gotten into them? They hadn't been this close all week and he had started to think Angel's first description of their relationship wasn't very close to the truth.

After they had filled Buffy in on their plans for the night, all was left to do was to ask for Holland's permission. Jesse's plea and Buffy's smile cut the discussion short and soon the coast was clear. Time to go shopping.

"Buffy, can I ask you something?" Jesse put his hand on her arm to stop her before they went upstairs to get Angel.

"Sure.", she turned, once again smiling.

"I…this is complicated." He blushed a little. "I know this is my last night here but since I might be coming back soon I thought that maybe…when I come back, you and me…Would you like to go out with me some time?"

"Oh…" she tried to keep smiling. "Well, I'm definitely flattered…and it's…" She paused, cursing herself for not foreseeing this. "To be honest, I like you Jesse. You're Angel's best friend and I'd be happy if you decided to stay here…but I don't think I can go out with you. It's just…I don't think it'd…I don't see it. Sorry."

Jesse's face fell, if only for a second. "Oh, ok."

"I'm sorry, really…" she searched his face for a reaction.

"No, don't be. It's ok, really. I just thought I'd try, you know. No harm done."

"Really?"

"Really."

She sighed with relief, believing him. Good thing Angel didn't hear this. Remembering what they were about to do she turned on her heels.

"Why don't you wait here while I get Angel? We'll be down in a sec."

Jesse nodded and watched her disappear.

"Damn…" he muttered, shaking his head to clear his thoughts. No harm done, yeah.

He headed downstairs to the garage, oblivious what was going on a floor above him.

Without knocking, Buffy burst into Angel's room where he just finished talking to Giles. Crawling into his lap, she gently nipped at his bottom lip before he grabbed her to deepen the kiss. Almost frantic, their mouths sought out each other, trying to draw out the stolen moment. Pausing for air he finally managed to ask what she was doing here.

"Coming to get you." She kissed him again. "Jesse's waiting downstairs."

He pulled her closer for another heated kiss. "Better get going then…"

"Uhu…" she agreed, walking backwards while he kept kissing her until they had reached the door.

"List?"

"Got it." She was reluctant to leave his arms again so soon but finally sighed and reached for the doorknob. "Ready?"

He kissed her one last time, far from ready to let go. "Ready…" he nodded and together they headed downstairs.

Faith matched Jesse's surprise at the change in the way Buffy and Angel were around each other once she arrived early to help with dinner. But other than Jesse she knew exactly that she was going to get answers to her questions. For now she just watched them, sometimes with a frown, sometimes with a smile. It was obvious they had put their differences behind them, it was evident in every smile, in every gesture. There were the oh-so-casual touches that seemed to last a little longer than necessary, there were the smiles out of nowhere and there were the looks. Poor Jesse, he had no idea that the girl he wanted was taken, and right now barely trying to hide it from the world.

"Here, try this…" Angel held out a spoon for Buffy and she obediently opened her mouth.

"Oh my god, that's delicious!" she beamed seconds later, her eyes locking with his once again.

Faith stared at them when Angel reached out and brushed a spilled drop from her mouth with his thumb. Buffy leaned into the caress and both jumped when Faith cleared her throat, announcing Jesse's return.

"Buffy? Could I talk to you for a second?" Faith pulled her friend with her into the dining room.

"I'm sorry…" Buffy immediately started to apologize, knowing things had once more gone too far.

"Keep it. That's not what I wanted to say." Faith whispered. "You two have obviously made up, well, fine. But you might want to keep the PDAs down a little."

"That bad?" Buffy's eyes widened in shock.

"Worse, believe me."

"Sorry…"

"Yeah, yeah. I know…" Faith rolled her eyes.

Buffy took a deep breath, ready to return to the kitchen. Only one more day...

Stuffed until even Gunn didn't ask for another round they lounged groggily in their chairs around the table.

"That was excellent…" Fred groaned happily.

"Yeah, good stuff." Giles agreed.

"So, Jesse…made a decision yet?" Anya turned her head into the brunette's direction.

"Nope." He shook his head. "Still got UCLA and San Diego to check out."

"But won't you lose an entire semester that way?" Fred piped up again.

Jesse laughed. "So what…It's not like I'm in a hurry…"

Buffy's gaze once again met Angel's and while everyone else discussed college options, they enjoyed their moment of nonverbal understanding. Maybe it'd be safe to…

"I'll just put these in the kitchen…" she grabbed to dishes next to her. Across the table, Angel mirrored her movements.

"Let me help…" Giles got up, ruining their plans. Soon everyone was busy running around between the kitchen and the dining room until the dishwasher was loaded and the leftovers safely in the fridge.

The party then retired to the living room where they talked and laughed the night away until the first started to yawn.

"Bye, man. It was nice to meet you." Gunn shook Jesse's hand.

"Yeah, maybe we'll see you around more often, soon." Anya hugged him.

"That'd be nice."

"It's been fun…" Giles was next.

Fred smiled shyly before she, too, gave Jesse a hug.

After the four of them had left, Jesse returned to the living room, where Buffy and Faith were once again lounging in an arm chair, yawning.

"Ok, I get why you're tired…" he grinned at Faith. "But you?"

Buffy grinned innocently but said nothing to defend herself.

"I'm not tired…" Faith complained, stifling another yawn.

"No, 'course not…" Buffy pulled her closer. "Party on…just don't expect me to carry you upstairs later."

"As if you could…" Faith giggled.

"Careful, she's stronger than she looks." Angel's voice came from the sofa, interrupting the playful banter.

Buffy smiled at him adoringly but continued to tease her friend.

"I'll just leave you here so that Mom has someone to talk to when she gets up early tomorrow."

"Please, woman, have mercy!" Faith threw her arms up and around Buffy's neck.

"Ok, ok…I'm not that cold-hearted." She grinned mischievously. "If one of the gentlemen would be so kind as to lift that burden from me and carry it upstairs?" Her eyes caught Jesse's. "Pretty please?"

Laughing, Jesse complied, lifted a squealing Faith from the armchair and threw her over his shoulder.

"Upstairs, to the left, all the way down the hall, the last door on the right, please." Buffy giggled while Jesse started marching up the stairs. She watched them disappear with a smile when two arms snuck around her waist from behind her.

"Hey…" she whispered, her smile growing wider.

"Hey." He murmured into her ear, pulling her closer.

Her head tilted back they met in a sweet kiss, both trying to keep things under control.

"Tomorrow…" he whispered once their lips had parted again.

"Actually…it's today…" she sought out his eyes. "Just a few hours…"

"Piece of cake…"

"Nothing…"

She turned around to kiss him passionately, her tongue tickling his lips before she sought out his to play with. He met her eagerly, almost desperately. How could a few hours seem so long?

They disentangled only to turn out the lights in the living room, then suddenly he swiped her up in his arms, stifling her squeal with another kiss.

"What are you doing?"

"Carrying you. Can't have you think he's stronger than me…"

"Macho." She nipped at his chin.

"Princess."

He finally let her down just outside her room, whispering his goodbye for the night. She reluctantly let go of his hand before she entered her room.

Inside waited Faith with a bottle of wine and a request for girl-talk.

He stared at the closed door for a few seconds and turned when he heard a muffled giggle.

Closing the door to his own room, he faced Jesse, holding two beers.

Angel knew he should be sad. A part of him was. His best friend was leaving town again and while they had talked about so much this week, the things that really concerned him had been left untouched. It would have been nice to have him here longer, for a year, maybe forever. Seeing him again made him realize how much he really missed him. Yet, even while the train left the station and his arm was raised in a final wave goodbye he couldn't help but feel thrilled about what was to come. Tightening his hold on Buffy's hip he watched the train disappear until it was out of sight. His arm fell to his side and he looked down with a smile.

"Ready, princess?"

"Mr. Macho Man, take me away…"

TBC…

So, Jesse's gone for now. But, to my own surprise, I like him a lot. So I'm not sure whether I want him to come back or not. What to you think? More Jesse? ;o)

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